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Thread: I feel so artificial... Need real expert help

  1. #1
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    Default I feel so artificial... Need real expert help

    I didn't want to say anything about this on the forum, but I really wanted some advice from pros that have been in lots of LTRs as well, I will keep this as clear as possible.

    Met this rare hottie from my own country twice back around April - June of last year, through family.every scenario we met in was a group scenario She was 19 at the time and I didn't really make any moves, just a Fb close. Fast forward to details, she was attracted to my appearance primarily and flirted with me quite intensely, I kept the flirting to a minimal in decent bite sized chunks and kino was always somewhat in play hiddenly. The first time, I showed a major ioi that aimed for one goal which paid off on the third meet.Finding attractive looking people from our country is quite difficult. She and I both know that. I'm also quite tall and well built, which is rare in our country and she compliments my height. But that's all pure attraction and its foolish of me to believe that in itself will keep her waiting for me. In the first 2 meets since it was purely group scenarios I was the leader directing all interactions, and I met her BFF on the second visit and I got her approval and all of her other friends, her parents loved me too.The third time we met the one thing I can remember is "aww you'd make a great hubby," It is exactly what I was aiming for with my major ioi from earlier.I acted unaffected when she said this though, bad choice? She is very submissive around me. I could not build any rapport as isolating her was impossible. I could only build attraction.

    My decision

    I know I'm a beginner, No F - closes yet from gaming, (Not a virgin but I don't count that first one) I still did not get past my chumpy behavior, that looks only get you through the front door, it happens to me with every girl, they are very attracted to me at first based on appearance, then weak game helps me lose the girl completely. Because of this factor I took her Fb to open her later, and I also felt that I needed to have my career a go if I were to pursue her(for her parents approval), which I am starting to admit may be just an excuse, but I felt that I will be better off if I game her in 6 - 12 months from now cause I was a wussy, I would have financial stability I said to myself. I didn`t not want to ruin it between us, with my bad phone game at the time either. If I lose her I lose her completely right...

    For that reason since August of last year no contact. I have been practicing and talking to other girls since then. But my one-itis for her keeps getting worse. Especially because I stalk her Fb sometimes, I know I shouldn't be.

    So should I be pursuing this girl and building that all important relationship that requires a lot of time and effort, dedication and connection. Seeing if she likes me for genuinely for who I am even if my skills aren't as great yet? or is that a bad idea and I can lose her for good? F&$k the DHV's the good looks and every f*$*ng other bullshit excuse and detail and just go and talk to her? or do I improve my game so I can 100% secure her.

    I believe she is just looking for the right guy to give it too lol kind of a dream come true for me, because I've been looking for her type for a looong time. I know she's really into me,but I don't want weak game being the factor that made me lose her.

    What to do if she doesn't remember my FB is dead with no profile picture? I would just number close her quick over FB. I'll give it a try if you guys think I should go for it now.

    I know its a long post, but I would appreciate it immensely if I could get some help. I don't know if I should be afraid or I should embrace this fear and just dive deep while " the iron is hot"... or improve myself more?

  2. #2
    wildstorms's Avatar
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    Default Re: I feel so artificial... Need real expert help

    Forget it I have the complete wrong mentality for gaming her right now I'm going to stay away from facebook and go sarging often, just forget about her for a few weeks or months and open her all or nothing.

    Personally, it is kind of stupid to have waited so long. But maybe not.

  3. #3
    Grey2fox is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: I feel so artificial... Need real expert help

    You've answered your own question really. Sarge and get rid of that oneitis feeling. Stay away from social media as it does more damage than good. Challenge yourself to not check your status for 30 days. I did that and it felt great. FB becomes insignificant and you are no longer bombarded with people pretending to have great lives all drunk and smiling when they can't even remember what they did on their last drunken night. The more you view those type of posts you will start to compare your life when you already live an awesome life.


    Either choose to stay away and refocus your mind or open her up again whilst your contact is still fresh in her memory. You seem like a cool guy so don't let financial instability kick you in the nuts. Money isn't an issue

  4. #4
    wildstorms's Avatar
    wildstorms is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: I feel so artificial... Need real expert help

    Quote Originally Posted by Grey2fox View Post
    You've answered your own question really. Sarge and get rid of that oneitis feeling. Stay away from social media as it does more damage than good. Challenge yourself to not check your status for 30 days. I did that and it felt great. FB becomes insignificant and you are no longer bombarded with people pretending to have great lives all drunk and smiling when they can't even remember what they did on their last drunken night. The more you view those type of posts you will start to compare your life when you already live an awesome life.


    Either choose to stay away and refocus your mind or open her up again whilst your contact is still fresh in her memory. You seem like a cool guy so don't let financial instability kick you in the nuts. Money isn't an issue
    Thanks for the reply grey2fox, Means a lot to me. I have slowly begun to realize building the relationship and having emotional equity and connection with her is far greater then any dhv. Giving her time and being there for her when she really needs her opposite half when her world is falling apart is far greater than anything else. It just really means a lot to woman. Just bonding with her and making her a natural part of your life. Keeping her happy and being her man. I'm actually glad I did what I did, because I did not see it that way before and would have lost her due to materialistic things and weak game! but now I''m going to dedicate honestly to improvement and Open her once my confidence has peaked, when I feel the time is right., I feel like I know what to do now and that in time all the answers to the rest will come to me as I go along this journey of life.

    I feel more of an urgency to complete my goals in life, like I' m high off life. I'm just glad I even have circumstances and challenges to deal with in the first place, like life is a gift

    Meteora really saved me today, thanks brother your advice saves me again and again. I remembered what you told me in a previous thread. Along the lines of "regardless of the situation, it is your attitude and behaviour towards the situation that will really make the difference." I would be depressed and sorry for myself but I'd rather go and challenge everything and crush it in life instead because of you. How will I ever repay you for your kindness ? You the boss bro! & Thanks y'all!

  5. #5
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    Default Re: I feel so artificial... Need real expert help

    As long as you're building attraction, you really can't fail. I work with a TON of hot chicks. It's work though, so it's always a mess when something comes up there, but the point is, I can build attraction with a girl one day. And then the next. Then not talk to her for a few weeks, but next time I see her, build more attraction. As long as I'm making the right moves, it really doesn't matter whether I move on her or not-- the attraction can still be there, just waiting for that right moment of serendipity. And of course, being experienced, I know how to provide that as well.

    So sarge away! And also keep in touch.

  6. #6
    wildstorms's Avatar
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    Default Re: I feel so artificial... Need real expert help

    Quote Originally Posted by Blackbird View Post
    As long as you're building attraction, you really can't fail. I work with a TON of hot chicks. It's work though, so it's always a mess when something comes up there, but the point is, I can build attraction with a girl one day. And then the next. Then not talk to her for a few weeks, but next time I see her, build more attraction. As long as I'm making the right moves, it really doesn't matter whether I move on her or not-- the attraction can still be there, just waiting for that right moment of serendipity. And of course, being experienced, I know how to provide that as well.

    So sarge away! And also keep in touch.
    Thank you for the reply my friend. Cheered me up . and soon I shall indeed.


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