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  • 2 Post By marvilo

Thread: Doubt about feelings and perceptions

  1. #1
    GabeLogan is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Smile Doubt about feelings and perceptions

    Hey guys,
    Speaking from Brazil here. The thing is: I'm fresh out of a relationship, which I used as some sort of comfort zone to avoid meeting new people. A day after the breakup, I hooked up with a HB 9, so my ego went through the roof. Realized my social skills weren't that bad, just a little rusty because of the comfort zone. Anyways, I just started going to College in a whole new place. Just know a few people there, but I'm not that close to them. I'm doing all these efforts to meet new people - making friends and socializing with women, but as I do this, I'm feeling like I'm alone. Sometimes my self esteem drops down. It's like when things are going well on my social interactions, i gain momentum, but when it goes bad, I start to feel lame for myself. What I would like to ask is: in your perspective, there is this point that you reach where you just don't care anymore about bad social interactions and rejections? Just have to keep pushing through? And about this no friends thing in the new college situation, any tips on how to deal with it? At my old school I had a social group with my friends, we would talk about girls, go to parties and blast a good time... but it seems that this is just gone. And at this new place, I'm at the second semester, and I couldn't bond deeply with anyone yet. Any tips for me? Sometimes, because of the fear, I just lose the will to approach and start talking. I'm like all on my own! Some advice? Studied PUA in a hardcore basis for a long time in the past, but when things started get good, like getting a girlfriend, I stopped. Now, it's like all my insecurities and some sudden self esteem drops are taking place. Well, even still, think I'm back in the game. Don't want to be a loser once again.
    Brazil here, sorry for any bad grammar
    Thanks...

  2. #2
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    marvilo is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Doubt about feelings and perceptions

    For the rejection and not caring it never goes away, but it subsides. You'll learn that rejection makes you better and everytime you get rejected you'll learn something new for the next time you go out and approach. Lol we've all been there, when you're winning of course you'll be happy but then you'll also be dependent on always winning and every interaction you get into you'll think you already have it in the bag and when you don't meet those expectations that's when you'll feel bad and start to question yourself and your skill. We've all been there, those who have actually been doing PU for many years are the ones that understand that things can't always go your way and not every woman will fuck you, no matter how good you are. Yes it hurts but if you keep at it you'll see a new yoyouyour confidence will be abundant. For the approach anxiety the way you stop it is just to approach. Don't give your mind the chance to give you reasons not to approach. Do it a lot and you'll start to approach any girl you want without thinking about it for less than 3 second. Also in my opinion being alone is better because others may mess up your flow and they may not know what to do. Idk about you but I'm doing pick up to better myself, so why bring someone who isn't there for the same thing? Think about it. Better to go by yourself then with someone who doesn't want the same thing as you .
    You lose some you win some, learn from your mistakes and get better!

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    Default Re: Doubt about feelings and perceptions

    marvilo is right. You care less and less the more you go out and approach. Most of the time the anxiety or fear of rejection won't full go away, sometimes you will just be on fire and be a machine. I also usually prefer to go out alone unless I'm with a wing is on the same page as me, but having a social circle can help. Start befriending a few cool people and invite them out to regular social gatherings and they will also reciprocate and invite you out. Your social network will grow and you will begin to develop social proof and pre-selection.
    Elevate Your Game | Check out my blog for lay reports, attraction and dancefloor game tips !

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