Top 10 Stats
Latest Posts Loading... Loading...
Loading...
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Results 1 to 4 of 4
  1. #1
    pepito is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 314, Level: 6
    Level completed: 28%, Points required for next Level: 36
    Overall activity: 35.0%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered250 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Posts
    131
    Points
    314
    Level
    6
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    22

    Default Is this a red flag and how do I deal with it?

    Hey guys,

    I met a really nice girl about 2 weeks ago and we had our first date yesterday. She is the girl-next door type, sweet and cute. I have to say I really like her. She is also a very interesting person with quite some knowledge. We got along pretty well the 2 times we met and we had very fun conversations.

    I think she also likes me as she was practically laughing at everything I was saying (even when it was not meant to be something funny), she was playing with her hair really a lot, and her body language was open. We already made plans to meet again as we have several interests in common (plus she also offered to practice German with me since she is a native speaker - I am taking classes after work since last year). She is also curious about me and my country (I am Mediterranean).

    Now, there is one little problem. She told me she broke up with her ex just about a month ago. She was with some Brazilian guy for some(?) years and they had a long-distance relationship (we live in Europe). It turns that things didn't work out and that he wasn't ready for some type of commitment. She seemed very upset about the break-up. I didn't make a big deal out of it, I simply shared my experience with long-distance relationships and that break-ups can indeed be hurtful but they are not the end of the world. People eventually move on once they digest the whole thing. She also said that she still occasionally talks with him through skype (guess that's normal, I did the same thing after my 3-year relationship with a girl). I then switched the topic to something lighter and funnier.

    So, is this a red flag of sorts and how do I handle this? I am looking for a relationship with a nice girl and without too much drama. Should I run or should I give her a chance? I really don't want to become the rebound guy...

    Thanks in advance for any advice.
    Cheers mates

  2. #2
    Hightower4000 is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 285, Level: 5
    Level completed: 70%, Points required for next Level: 15
    Overall activity: 64.0%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered250 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    Amsterdam
    Posts
    24
    Points
    285
    Level
    5
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    16

    Default Re: Is this a red flag and how do I deal with it?

    I don't think it's a red flag, but an opportunity to be everything she wants right now: fun! Have a good time with her, build attraction but don't pressure it to be something serious. Chances are she won't feel so good after talking to her ex, while feeling great and forgetting all about it while being with you. She will do the math eventually.

  3. #3
    drgnsfire12 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 3,671, Level: 38
    Level completed: 14%, Points required for next Level: 129
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    1000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Location
    New York, New York
    Posts
    588
    Points
    3,671
    Level
    38
    Thanks
    5
    Thanked 37 Times in 36 Posts
    Rep Power
    181

    Default Re: Is this a red flag and how do I deal with it?

    He's in Brazil, you are there with her so you have the advantage. Do your thing, go out with her, have fun, build attraction, and make her forget him. GL

  4. #4
    pepito is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 314, Level: 6
    Level completed: 28%, Points required for next Level: 36
    Overall activity: 35.0%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered250 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Posts
    131
    Points
    314
    Level
    6
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    22

    Default Re: Is this a red flag and how do I deal with it?

    Hey guys, thanks a lot for the feedback, much appreciated

    I admit I was a bit bothered by the fact that her break-up was so fresh and that she still talked to her ex. This makes the dating process harder as I have to take things slower and she may not be ready to move on yet... Sure, I may be over-analysing things but I certainly ain't giving up

    The best way I have found for dealing with "dating anxiety" is to date multiple girls. I get so busy that I don't have time to worry about trivial issues.

    So, we just had a lunch date today. I really like how I can practically talk about everything and that we share the same views on so many things. She also really liked the place and the food, she did not talk about her ex and she even invited me to her birthday party next week. Hope that's a good sign...

    But then, we added each other on facebook and I realised she has kept literally all of her pictures with her ex... Yup, she seems to still be hooked...
    I also checked the guest list for her birthday party, and there's an impressive amount of guys, all from her samba class... Damn, and I am really no good dancer


Similar Threads

  1. How Would You Deal With This?
    By CaConfused in forum General Questions
    Replies: 1
    Last Thread: 05-02-2014, 01:29 PM
  2. Is this a red flag? How should I react?
    By shadzzz in forum Online And Text Game
    Replies: 5
    Last Thread: 10-31-2013, 07:16 PM
  3. Is this a red flag?
    By bhawker in forum Online And Text Game
    Replies: 5
    Last Thread: 05-22-2013, 09:59 PM
  4. Not Sure What Her Deal Is
    By Falcon in forum General Questions
    Replies: 1
    Last Thread: 01-07-2013, 07:06 PM
  5. How do I deal with this?
    By howser111 in forum Online And Text Game
    Replies: 1
    Last Thread: 11-03-2012, 09:40 AM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
DMCA.com