I posted on here about saving a dying relationship, but as it turned out it was already gone. After a year and a half, my girlfriend left me. We had fought, and after that had not talked for two days. On the second night she messaged me saying shes bringing my stuff to me at my parents place (as we lived at her place mostly), that this isn't working and we need to break up. We talked when she came, and she said she isnt happy, that we havent been doing well for a long time and that "she loves me, but isnt in love with me anymore". Now, we had problems, and fights but I know that the underlying issue is that after i fell for her, our lives became one. I dropped my hobbies, friends and betrayed myself as she became the only thing i cared about. I had changed, and obviously that codependency was unattractive, causing her to become hostile and argumentative over menial things. Neither of us were happy near the end. Still, when she came and said it was over, I was in shock. I wanted to work things out, saying I could change, be that partner she needed (she thought i was too demanding and controlling), told her to give it a chance, but of course she was already set on her choice (Trust me, I know better than to be begging). I know a lot of you would suggest to leave and never come back, but I do love this girl still and want to work this out. Ive decided to detox myself by going No Contact for 30 days, and sorting out my own insecurities and issues. Its now day 5, and I havent talked to her. She sent me a long email two days ago pretty much summarizing what she felt were the problems and saying how she didnt mean to hurt me, how she deeply cares for me, and would be open to working this out in the future (within months, a year, or years as she put it), but she needs to focus on herself (i can PM the email if anyone wants to see and help me analyze). First few days were fucking terrible, but i still went out, I laid another girl and have been trying to focus on myself. I didnt respond to her email which i trust is the right choice if we are to get back together at some point. She knows how codependent I am so i figure fighting the urge to reply would both help me and show her she's wrong. Im still pretty distraught and dont know whats going on... How does she feel, is she relieved? Does she miss me? Is she looking for someone else? What are the chances that we do get back together after this time of No contact passes? Was it okay that I didn't respond to the email? God Im fucking wrecked, its like coming off heroine.
I need your thoughts and your help with this one boys, I do love this girl