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  • 1 Post By Mr. Assertive
  • 1 Post By OG_PlMP

Thread: I have really bad oneitis with a girl 10,000 miles away

  1. #1
    OG_PlMP is offline PUA in Training
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    Default I have really bad oneitis with a girl 10,000 miles away

    I was dating a girl who about 8 months ago moved to Europe. She is coming back in 6-8 months and we plan to be together again, but in the meantime we are both single and I want to meet more ladies. The only problem, I'm obsessed with this girl. She's all I can think about. As for me, I'm single, have only hooked up with 1 girl since she left (one night stand from tinder), and have no social life. I work 9-6 M-F, no one my age or compatible to be in my social group at work, and I know nobody in my city as I moved here for work from another state. What can I do to cure my oneitis and improve my social life? I would love to meet more girls (even guys to build a circle of friends).

  2. #2
    Mr. Assertive is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: I have really bad oneitis with a girl 10,000 miles away

    OG Pimp huh...right right...

    Hook up with more girls and see if you still obsess about her. The only way to build your social life is by going out and meeting people. There are things such as meetup.com or you can try to befriend people at work. Take up some hobbies, do something, anything. Tinder and online dating is also another venue to meet chicks. Possibilities are endless, the fact that you even mentioned 10,000 miles away should be enough to understand how irrational your one-itis is.


    What bothers me is that you have game my friend, I just checked out your likes and you know your shit man isn't this you ?

    I feel like what can help you here is looking at your own past advice to other people on this forum. Just slap yourself with some clarity. You are letting your emotions run you right now and you can't let that happen.

    I would like to see this guy that wrote below come out, because hell, I still need some advice on how to game chicks. Leave the oneitus dude on the bench.

    I've posted about the tinder app before, but lately I've been using it much more and getting amazing results. I'm talking to so many females right now I've got them begging to meet up with me (not literally begging but you get the point). Its a huge confidence booster, a great way to practice your text game with little risk, and a great way to meet dozens of girls, many of which are either dtf or looking for a relationship (you'll figure out which one when you talk to them).

    All you need is a smartphone/tablet, a facebook profile, and the tinder app (free). I won't explain the mechanics of the app but just "like" or swipe right on every decent looking girl you see. It takes a lot to get a match, even if you're good looking, so don't get discouraged...but if you use it enough you will get plenty.

    Once you have a girl that likes you back (a match) then you can open and fire away with your text game. In my experience 50% of the girls I matched actually respond to my opener. Get their number after a little banter (cocky/funny works great in my experience) and text away!

    I'm not going to get into text game itself as there are pretty decent guides in the stickies, but a few rules I follow are:

    1. Act like you're the shit, AKA the prize (cocky/funny)
    2. Never ask the "get to know you" questions unless playing a 20-questions type game
    3. Try to be the one to control the frame
    4. Be mysterious or answer "get to know you" type questions indirectly

    Gotta run - meeting up with a chick from tinder who already sent me naked pictures of herself. Peace.

  3. #3
    OG_PlMP is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: I have really bad oneitis with a girl 10,000 miles away

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Assertive View Post
    OG Pimp huh...right right...

    Hook up with more girls and see if you still obsess about her. The only way to build your social life is by going out and meeting people. There are things such as meetup.com or you can try to befriend people at work. Take up some hobbies, do something, anything. Tinder and online dating is also another venue to meet chicks. Possibilities are endless, the fact that you even mentioned 10,000 miles away should be enough to understand how irrational your one-itis is.


    What bothers me is that you have game my friend, I just checked out your likes and you know your shit man isn't this you ?

    I feel like what can help you here is looking at your own past advice to other people on this forum. Just slap yourself with some clarity. You are letting your emotions run you right now and you can't let that happen.

    I would like to see this guy that wrote below come out, because hell, I still need some advice on how to game chicks. Leave the oneitus dude on the bench.
    Thats exactly what bothers me as well. But you know what? You're absolutely right. Your answer got me thinking...the "old" me would never let this happen... I used to juggle girls quite frequently and look at me now, hung up on one girl that I know I can't be with right now...

    This girl was my safety net. When I moved to a new city, this was the only person I knew. I quickly grew romantically involved with her and things were awesome. I know things were tight between us so I pictured myself with her for the long term. Then she moved away. I know she's coming back not too long and she wants to be with me so in my mind I didn't need to try hard to meet other girls (even at my best, PUA still didn't come natural to me, I had to think about every single step to make the correct outcome happen). Now that she's gone, I'm single and alone. Instead of getting out there and meeting more people, I felt more and more attached to someone I know I cant be with now.

    Thinking about the situation, I need to fall back with this girl. Stop texting her so frequently, stop webcaming with her as often, stop thinking about her coming back and being with her. In other words, keep her on the back burner but focus most of my energy to starting and improving current relationships. Even though shes coming back, I need to get into the mindset that its 100% impossible for me to be with this girl and pretend she doesn't exist in my life. That way I can realize how pathetic my situation really is and make a change. I have no girls in my life, very few people I can actually rely on, and its going to stay this way unless I do something. And the first change comes in my mindset. Nothings going to happen unless I make it happen.

    Yeah that was me, I feel like I used to be much better with girls but then after finding a little success in my PUA studies, I found what I was looking for and stopped trying/reading PUA posts. Now that what I'm looking for isn't there anymore, I need to go find it again. Thats all there is to it. The girls are out there, now I just have to find them.

  4. #4
    Mr. Assertive is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: I have really bad oneitis with a girl 10,000 miles away

    You should always put yourself first, since no one else will do it for you. You are the most important person in your life, always remember that and being selfish is what I think saved me from my past relationship when I got the oneitis. I could see why you liked the girl, she was the only person you knew in a place you were not familiar with. It is easy to take a backseat and let someone else run the show, but that isn't what a masculine man does, does he ?. A confident man tells himself, that he is able to tolerate uncertainty. You live in a new place, but if you tell yourself that you are okay and things will work out, because no one can predict the future..I am sure you will be successful in no time.

    You know what the strategy is, you laid out for yourself, it might take awhile to break bad habits but if you constantly remind yourself everyday why this needs to be done, you will recover quickly and bring out that original pimp from months ago. I think this time around, even though you do find what you are looking for, I recommend sticking with it for a little while longer, even if you found the woman of your dreams. That was my bad when I got into my relationship, I saw the safety net and chose the net instead of unleashing my full potential.


    I can't wait to see your lay reports/ advice again...see you soon.


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