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Thread: what strategy/bf destroyer to use for a LTR

  1. #1
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    Question what strategy/bf destroyer to use for a LTR

    So there's this girl who's in a LTR (about 12-15months), she wasn't happy with the relationship and they had a brake after which he "changed" and she took her back after his many attempts at sucking up to her. Anyways, during their brake we were seeing each other but since I had no experience in the art of PU, I was very needy, jealous and made many more mistakes, I was able to **** it up about within a month - even though she was extremely attracted to me. We still meet up about once a month just to chit chat but I try to be as plutonic as possible since I don't know what type of boyfriend destroyer tactic I should use since I already know that she has a boyfriend and she never seems to mention him. I know that the whole boyfriend destroyer thing is about being under the radar, and that's exactly how I want to act but honestly, I don't know where to start.

    Before you start to criticize me, I just want to point out that he's an asshole, doesn't treat her well, and from what I've heard about him from her lips in the past, I should feel no shame interrupting their relationship. And that's truly saying something because I'm a very nice guy and would never lay a finger on these types of things if I knew I was in the wrong

  2. #2
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    Default Re: what strategy/bf destroyer to use for a LTR

    I had no experience in the art of PU, I was very needy, jealous and made many more mistakes
    nothings worse than a bad first impression. if you couldn't fark her when she was "taking a break" from her boyfriend, no boyfriend destroyer is going to make a difference when she's "seeing him"

    I don't know where to start
    the place to start is by pursuing other girls as well as this one. that will help destroy your "needy, jealous, and worried about making mistakes" behavior more than anything else. having options will boost your confidence and non-neediness to the levels they need to be at. "she has a boyfriend? so what I have a girlfriend" "I really want her! but if it doesn't work out I have 3 other girls in line to praise my c*ck" "I don't want to mess this up. but even if I do I'm still getting wet in someone else tonight"

    do you see the difference? having a buffet of options will make non-needy behavior come naturally.

    I know that the whole boyfriend destroyer thing is about being under the radar, and that's exactly how I want to act but honestly, I don't know where to start.
    here's an idea, instead of obsessing over exactly how to boyfriend destroy, use my tactic:

    1. do not ever mention her boyfriend
    2. if she mentions him, change the subject.
    3.keep escalating physically
    4.make her feel safe. (ie, do things to demonstrate that no one will ever know if things happen between the two of you)
    5.escalate to the point of farking her.
    6. if she continually mentions her boyfriend throughout the whole damn night. flat out tell her: "your boyfriend troubles are none of my business"

  3. #3
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    Default Re: what strategy/bf destroyer to use for a LTR

    yeah it's crucial to have more options not only because you'll have a plan b,c,d,e but also because she will see that girls are attracted to you and will feel like she's missing out. The thing is, I do have some other options at the moment and they are definitely attracted to me, I don't fear that it is going to be hard to spark the attraction back wit her but rather to make her think of her boyfriend not as a night in shining armor. Because - if I do manage to make her feel attracted to me and escalate physically there is a chance that it would be successful to do, but in the end LMR would kick in and ruin everything, not just the physical escalation but everything for she would just stop seeing me. So even though I like your advice to not mention her boyfriend, I'm in a rather different situation where I'm not just trying to sleep with a girl and make her rationalize her actions with me for a few hours - one night stand. So even though your tactic's pretty good to make it seem like you don't care about the bf what so ever, I can't really apply it to my current situation if I want to seek more long-term results

  4. #4
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    Default Re: what strategy/bf destroyer to use for a LTR

    To be honest I don't think the BF destroyers work that well and I've seen girls actually get angry and start defending the BF ..... I would do what Meteora said ...... run normal game, and avoid any and all BF talk

  5. #5
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    Default Re: what strategy/bf destroyer to use for a LTR

    yeah it's crucial to have more options not only because you'll have a plan b,c,d,e but also because she will see that girls are attracted to you and will feel like she's missing out.
    the idea has nothing to do with using pre-selection to make her want you. its all about the psychological effect that having options has on you and your inner game.

    one-it-is ,is your problem. you're still way too worried about how this girl sees you and how you're going to "get a relationship" with her.

    she's on a pedestal, you've already allowed her to infect your mind without forcing her to work for it every step of the way.

    So even though your tactic's pretty good to make it seem like you don't care about the bf what so ever, I can't really apply it to my current situation if I want to seek more long-term results
    I don't just "make it seem" like I don't care about the boyfriend. I genuinely don't care about or care to hear about the boyfriend.


    To be honest I don't think the BF destroyers work that well and I've seen girls actually get angry and start defending the BF
    the whole idea of the boyfriend destroyer is that you are the one defending her boyfriend wile getting her to say bad things about him. it only works if the girl is on the brink of breaking up with him anyways.

    I would do what Meteora said ...... run normal game, and avoid any and all BF talk
    yes. if there's enough attraction, you shouldn't need a boyfriend destroyer or any other cheesy routine.

    I know its frustrating when you really like a girl and she doesn't feel the same way, but it won't change until you let go of this idea that you have to have her, and her alone.

    hit the buffet, and come back to the ice cream when the desert line gets shorter.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: what strategy/bf destroyer to use for a LTR

    you're missing what I'm trying to say, I'm not worried about not being able to build attraction again, I genuinely believe.. hell I know I can do it, but she's not going to be able to rationalize her actions with me for a long time if she still thinks of him in a good way. And yes - I know that the whole point of using a bf destroyer is to defend him and make her talk bad about him, for the record - I wasn't talking about bashing about him and telling her that he's a prick and what not.

    There is no thought in my mind that I only need to "have" this girl because at this moment it would be idiotic to say that she's "the one" but I just want to know how it will go down, now - when I managed to get rid-off the mindset of an AFC. I know it may seem that I'm only going after her and her only, but truth be told I just want to get her by doing it in the smartest and most effective way possible - not to be confused with putting her on a pedestal. Anyways, you're obviously more experienced in the art PU than me, so I will trust your guidance - completely ignore the fact that he exists and just use negs to keep my game under the radar

  7. #7
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    Default Re: what strategy/bf destroyer to use for a LTR

    There is no thought in my mind that I only need to "have" this girl because at this moment it would be idiotic to say that she's "the one" but I just want to know how it will go down, now - when I managed to get rid-off the mindset of an AFC. I know it may seem that I'm only going after her and her only, but truth be told I just want to get her by doing it in the smartest and most effective way possible - not to be confused with putting her on a pedestal. Anyways, you're obviously more experienced in the art PU than me, so I will trust your guidance - completely ignore the fact that he exists and just use negs to keep my game under the radar
    I'm glad to hear that she isn't the only girl you're talking to/hanging out with. having other girls around (even female friends) will make you much more comfortable, and less outcome dependent.

    [QUOTE][doing it in the smartest and most effective way possible/QUOTE]

    smartest and most effective way possible is to act like she's single, avoid the boyfriend topic, maintain your friendship and continue to work on yourself during this time.

    keep her in the line-up of girls you hang out with, and one day you might get a good opportunity to be with her.

    example: last week I went to a birthday party for one of the girls in my line-up. we had been friends for a while and every time I hang out with her we get drunk and do cool stuff (like drunken beach ball at the pool, bar hopping, house parties, ect...) I really only kept her around because she's a fun friend to get drunk with and because she gets invited to a lot of parties. she was dating a mutual friend of ours for a while and I really didn't care about sleeping with her. I just enjoyed some of the fun stuff we do. that night though was different, her boyfriend had broken up with her a week before her birthday. so of course she was hanging all over me the whole damn night, I was sort of annoyed by it. so of course I power drank to catch up with her level of drunk. she kept sitting on my lap and I would shove her off. then she really wanted me to dance with her, I only danced with her in exchange for more alcohol.(I had drank the whole 6 pack of beer I brought, and she gave me 3 more) some of the other dudes had came there to score with her, they saw what was going on and decided not to stick around. I had a few more drinks and a large number of the people from the party left to go get mcdonalds. we were the only two in the living room, and she literally started groping my man parts. I told her to slow down, so she just pulled my pants down, got on her knees and did bad things with her mouth. I woke up the next day with a horrible headache laying naked beside her with a used condom stuck to her thigh. I f*cked her again that morning.

    I probably could have had a relationship with her had I not ignored her for the rest of the week. (now she's telling me about her new "boyfriend" trying to make me jealous so i'll fark her again.) (despite being attractive, and tight; she was a dead fish in bed, and even worse at giving head)

    so I will trust your guidance - completely ignore the fact that he exists and just use negs to keep my game under the radar
    that's the way to go. just don't overuse negs. too many people use them as a crutch for bad game and destroy peoples self confidence just so they can get laid. I prefer playful teasing, sarcasm and thinly veiled innuendos: anything to keep from becoming too predictable.


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