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  • 1 Post By Vicodin24
  • 1 Post By Tetembay

Thread: gaming an old friend, hadn't seen her for years

  1. #1
    tonyp is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default gaming an old friend, hadn't seen her for years

    I've noticed that if girls want you in the FZ they tend to LJBF you pretty fast. If they don't, does it mean you should escalate until either you get a clear LJBF or you get either body-language IOIs to show attraction and some qualification too? I'm assuming you've already got comfort, so we're working in reverse order, so to speak.

    I'm thinking of one girl in particular whom I knew as an emotionally close friend 10 years ago at college. Both of us have been through dire marriages and are now on the market. We recently met up and spent a long time talking. Her father is a leading politician, which I think made me too shy to escalate or suggest a physical relationship and romance with her back in the early years of the century when we knew each other and I was a pathetic AFC. So we just became close friends instead. I'm not f***king shy like that now!

    We're reminiscing a lot, and I've had some obvious body-language IOIs, so should I tell her I had the hots for her back when we were at college? Or is that utterly wimpish, because who cares about then because that was then and now is now and I should treat the situation as if I'd just done a PU without knowing her before? I'm kind of in the FZ without having been LJBFed. Making her jealous isn't something I want to do because she's depressed a lot. I'm getting lots of emotional connection and rapport and comfort...but...game advice anyone?

  2. #2
    Vicodin24's Avatar
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    Default Re: gaming an old friend, hadn't seen her for years

    Kino kino kino kino kino and....KINO!

    You're in a great situation to escalate. You're both older AND more mature. That will play into how much more receptive she is. Say something cheesy while you stroke her face and put her hair behind her ears:

    "I just noticed how revealing/piercing/intelligent/crossed (don't say the last one; you get the picture) your eyes are..." (Triangle gaze and lean in; do NOT hesitate.)

    Side note - be careful if she's depressed. Keep your intentions clear.
    Always leave her better than you found her.

  3. #3
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    Default Re: gaming an old friend, hadn't seen her for years

    I already responded to another post of yours about the "friend zone". I recently wrote a post you should check out about a woman I've known for 12 years. You can read it here https://www.puaforums.com/field-repo...iend-zone.html

  4. #4
    tonyp is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: gaming an old friend, hadn't seen her for years

    Quote Originally Posted by Vicodin24 View Post
    Kino kino kino kino kino and....KINO!

    You're in a great situation to escalate. You're both older AND more mature. That will play into how much more receptive she is. Say something cheesy while you stroke her face and put her hair behind her ears:

    "I just noticed how revealing/piercing/intelligent/crossed (don't say the last one; you get the picture) your eyes are..." (Triangle gaze and lean in; do NOT hesitate.)

    Side note - be careful if she's depressed. Keep your intentions clear.
    Thanks for this. I get the picture from what you and DirectIsBest are both saying, and I will raise the flirting and then make a move. Cheesy? Sure, I've got some cheese in my repertoire!

    Can you expand on your side note a bit? I'm aiming for a gf-close but if I don't get it then I want to stay in the FZ, either getting the gf-close eventually or staying friends. Some might call me a wuss for this, but she's depressed a lot and I don't want to make her situation worse (I like women, for goodness sake!! ) or cause her to lose her equilibrium. So "f*** me or f*** off" is the opposite of the frame I need to create. I'd appreciate some advice on this specific point.

  5. #5
    Alergy is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: gaming an old friend, hadn't seen her for years

    you're forgetting one of the simple basics.. IOI's, if she's giving you 0 of them then you know where you stand, but if you're escalating with kino to kissing/foreplay/sex then I really don't think she'd friendzone you after doing those things with you, she might say no or not now if you're missing rapport, if you don't want to risk then just don't ask the big question, I really don't think it has that much importance, but if you think otherwise, go for it when you feel the time is right

  6. #6
    Tetembay is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: gaming an old friend, hadn't seen her for years

    Sounds like you have a good start. You have lots of touch going on, but it sounds like you need to give a statement of intent. That one about how you used to have a crush on her sounded good. Say "I remember I used to have a crush on you back in college. Anyway I was just thinking about that time that we.... blah blah blah." Just start layering in statements of intent and then kiss her.

  7. #7
    tonyp is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: gaming an old friend, hadn't seen her for years

    Quote Originally Posted by Tetembay View Post
    Sounds like you have a good start. You have lots of touch going on, but it sounds like you need to give a statement of intent. That one about how you used to have a crush on her sounded good. Say "I remember I used to have a crush on you back in college. Anyway I was just thinking about that time that we.... blah blah blah." Just start layering in statements of intent and then kiss her.
    Thanks for this, Tetembay. I was thinking I'd read all the main good books on game (the ones without a misogynist or instrumentalist flavour anyway), but I've only just come across the theory of SOIs and I'll read Juggler's book. I've just read TheManSohan's post on this forum.

    "Looking at me like that is just asking for trouble" is a very nice line - great ambiguity and possibly a powerful connection with her emotions if she's giving an IOI such as doe eyes. Multilevel, and since when were women's emotions anything else?

    So is "Shut up and kiss me" after some preparatory kino.

    I think I'll first say something about how sexy I found her when we were at college though (not as coldly as that, of course), as you suggest... Got quite a lot to draw on!


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