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  1. #1
    wildstorms's Avatar
    wildstorms is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Went to an event last week...

    Hey everyone just looking for some general ideas here.

    Last week I decided to go to a cultural event. I went with family, and did not really have much gaming in mind just basic social dynamics practice. So I went well dressed and tried to just enjoy myself.

    There was a little concert going on and fair enough most of the event was around the concert and so I happened to get seated with a 2 set, mother and daughter. Daughter I would honestly say is a 6 but maybe even a 7 (she had almost no make up.)

    She was giving me many iois and 45 minutes in however she starts shit testing me. It's a bit of a rock concert and everyones going a bit wild jumping and dancing to the song like it should be, now however I myself wasn't and so when she sat down she asked whats wrong? are you ok, you're just sitting? bored ? etc...

    LOL so thrown into this situation I was not prepared, and tried to play it off like a I was too cool for it. Twice she busted me for trying and then finally I called her a "groupie" WITHOUT KNOWING what it meant LOL. (I thought it just meant you're a hardcore fan of the band... OOPS) So based off her reaction I realized she was offended and said "just joking" and said something positive.

    So as the night continued she still kept giving me iois and kept asking if I was bored etc. I felt like I screwed up and the conversations died + I started in comfort not attraction so I'm sure I'm leaning closer to the friendzone anyways. So now her mom leaves to talk to some people while the concert is in full effect, while she stayed, which I took as a passive ioi. Second once she finally left after about 20 minutes to talk to her mom she she had left her bag and umbrella beside me. She came back after 10 minutes and called me to get them for her (This is an ioi I read somewhere) She was at the very edge of the seats and I was in the middle, I felt it was way to much hassle for me to squeeze through everyone and I did not bother with it leaving her to struggle herself to get them. Once the concert ended she said "I won't forget that."

    Funny thing is about 5 minutes later I still keep seeing her walking around saying bye to people, and she comes to me and number closes me lol? I sent her this text that I made up that has ALWAYS gotten a positive reaction and reply but she did not reply.

    So aside all jokes about me aside;

    What would me calling her a "groupie" do to her?
    What would me rejecting her bag request do to her?

    She never replied to that text, she expects me to call, but I haven't yet. I will sooner rather than later.

  2. #2
    mystique's Avatar
    mystique is offline A woman's perspective
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    Default Re: Went to an event last week...

    1. Who cares
    2. She was obviously interested in you or she wouldn't have kept trying to talk to her
    3. Phone her and ask her on a date
    You will never do ANYTHING in this world without COURAGE. - Aristotle

  3. #3
    Cool Lover's Avatar
    Cool Lover is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Went to an event last week...

    I jokingly called a girl a groupie the other day, that pretty much ended the conversation. I think that word may be easily misconstrued to have a sexual connotation (the groupie chicks who follow the band trying to hook up with them), even though it technically doesn't necessarily mean that. The root of the word is group, it just means they group around the band (admirers).

    Remember, people don't always know the precise definitions of words. Even though I thought I delivered it in a kidding/teasing tone, the word itself may have triggered her ASD or whatever, and I really didn't demonstrate enough value/rapport at that point, so she was probably genuinely insulted without my knowledge.

    Plus, she's a little music groupie, and the sound of the word amplified the bad tone in her auditory-favoring nuerolinguistic psychological circuitry. Or, maybe not. I know that going forward, I'm gonna swap the G-word with "roadie" for my little negs!

    As for the bag, leaving her stuff next to you can be an IOI. Giving you shit about not dancing might be IOI (is she the dance police?). I've never heard of calling for you to get her bag as being an IOI. If it is was less reasonable for you to get the stuff than for her to get it herself, then it could be a shit-test, which is sometimes seen as an IOI. But shit-test or not, it also creates also an opportunity! Ideally, I would've added my own terms:

    If things were fiesty, you could give her an order, "First, Blow me... a kiss!". But, remember to calibrate to the situation. Maybe not with the pause with mom in earshot. Basically, "What's in it for me?" Or, get the purse and umbrella "Sure, but...", and before handing them over, add the terms, "... but, you have to give me a 10-minute backrub". I mean she should reward you being a gentlemanly awesome dude and for watching her stuff. If she can't give you one now, then get her number so she can give you one later. Shit-test or not, those little requests give you options to escalate. You probably knew this... It's easier on a keyboard than in the field.

    Honestly, I wasn't there, but it sounds like she got cocky with you about the bag request, mirroring your own cockiness for calling her a band tramp and making her get her own stuff. She was intrigued enough to approach you to exchange numbers. Call her, assume attraction, resume attracting, set up a date, qualify her before building rapport. Hope it works for you, bro.

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