Quote Originally Posted by Somebody View Post
No, I don't need to believe it because I think I can't get one. That's like accepting that I won't ever be able to get one, which I don't accept. I just don't think I'm ready yet to get one because I've been depressed almost every day and am facing social anxiety and poor social skills. I haven't figured out how to conquer these problems yet and I don't believe hardly any women is going to want to have a relationship with me when I'm in this state, even though I'm tall and good looking.

I'm saying I need to understand that my happiness shouldn't be dependent on another person, including a woman. So I agree with you 100%. I think having a woman in my life would boost my happiness and confidence, but I should be happy and confident without one as well. I understand that this is what women and people in general are attracted to. In fact, I understand a lot of why I have been so unattractive to women. I can picture the man I need to be to attract women. I need to be happy, confident, fun, indifferent, blah blah blah. It's not different from who I am because being depressed and unconfident all the time is not really who I am. They're feelings....deep rooted negative thoughts and beliefs that must be uprooted and burned. Doing so though has been the biggest challenge I've ever faced.

I'm not trying to be someone different here. I'm trying to bring out the real person I am inside....the real jewel inside me that I know is there. As a man, I was born to be confident and good with the ladies, but I've only been one 2 dates my entire life. I would date more, and I did learn a lot from my last rejection, but I don't know if I'm ready. Why I got rejected last time was because of depression, a lack of confidence, and poor social skills. Should I really just say "fuck it" and start approaching women or try online dating if I'm in this state?
I've never tried online dating because I don't find it really sincere, like hiding behind a screen and all, but don't be prejudiced like me, by all means try it, maybe it'll benefit you in certain ways.

If you're really anxious about approaching beautiful women, start approaching the ones who aren't really attractive to you. Hell if you can't even do that, just approach random people. Dudes, old ladies, anyone you see...

You say it's your biggest challenge so far and you being able to acknowledge that is already half the way. Trust me, many people live and die without even getting to know themselves fully. Self-evaluation and self-criticism takes a lot of courage.

It's also men's instinct to attack problems. So attack them. There is no magical formula that will make you do it in a day. Start small like I told you. Step by step.

I remember I was kinda like you about 3 years ago. I didn't even have friends. Then I found this forum, started reading. Here we're trying to teach people that PUA is not just about women, instead it's actually about the self. When you make yourself better, women will come running.