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  1. #1
    klngskir is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Escaping the friend zone. She's reconnected, I don't want to bugger it up

    A back story, I'll try to be brief. She got cheated on by her BF of 7 years 9 months ago and ran into my arms. I was genuinely her friend before that so we hung out and things got really datey - dinners, walks, museums, etc. I fell for her (foolish but emotions aren't subject to logic). She, still distraught from the breakup moved to a different city to with the pretext of 'taking some classes'. I had reason to be there some soon after she moved and things seemed just a intense, lots of touching, eye contact, continued date activities and nearly continuous texting when we were apart.

    Over the summer we didn't see each other much and texting dropped off a lot. This fall I had a work project there that required my presence one day a week for a month and a half. She made time in her schedule (80 hours a week between classes and jobs) most of the times I was down there and each time we hung out for several hours, going to dinners, going on walks etc. Some weeks she seemed to be very into me and other's she was more withdrawn.

    On the last weekend I was down there I asked her out. I should have done this earlier, when I first started falling for her and when she was showing strong signals but I justified that I didn't want to take advantage of her when she was on the rebound (really, it was at least 1/2 cowardice). Anyway, she didn't immediately say yes or no. Later, after I had left, she texted me that it wasn't a good idea for us to date but that we should keep it friends. I texted her basically ok but was really disappointed and haven't contacted her in any way since. I saw her once over thanksgiving at a bar and we talked some, if somewhat awkwardly.

    Last week she texted me about the name of a place we had gone and tonight she sort of asked if she could go skiing with me tomorrow (she asked for a ride to the resort and given our history, in the past this means we'll end up skiing together).

    To my understanding, this might be progressing well for getting out of the friend zone. I cut off contact and have been doing my own stuff. Now she is chasing after my attention with no promoting from me. The question is how do I act now when we hang out? Do I remain friendly but cool? I need some advice on where I go from here.

    Thanks

  2. #2
    Kyl3's Avatar
    Kyl3 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Escaping the friend zone. She's reconnected, I don't want to bugger it

    Look at my thread I typed years ago. Click my name and find it. That should help.

  3. #3
    Honcho is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Escaping the friend zone. She's reconnected, I don't want to bugger it

    She probably just needs a ride. Stay away from that one.

  4. #4
    klngskir is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Escaping the friend zone. She's reconnected, I don't want to bugger it

    I'm certain she could get another ride just as easily. Even when I saw her over thanksgiving she suggested that I take her to this cool spot I knew of. I was leaving the next morning so nothing happened.

  5. #5
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: Escaping the friend zone. She's reconnected, I don't want to bugger it

    Next time you see her, put your hand on her vagina and see how she acts...

    Or maybe on her thigh...

  6. #6
    Honcho is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Escaping the friend zone. She's reconnected, I don't want to bugger it

    Why do you assume because she wants to ride with you, she automatically wants to have sex with you. Despite the fact that she told you quite abruptly she DID NOT.

    My advice, find a different chick to focus on, you can still hang out with her if you want, but don't get pissed when nothing ever becomes of it.

  7. #7
    Bluenose10 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Escaping the friend zone. She's reconnected, I don't want to bugger it

    I'm no expert but i consider myself an intelligent person and i have read a few things about pua here and there.

    You should have made a move early on when things seemed hot, not doing so tells a girl you're beta, and girls don't want betas.

    Also i don't know if it's true but people on the forums say texting a lot bakc and forth leads to being in the friend zone, unless your game is very strong and you have girls melting over you, you should probably avoid texting too much, you'll probably be coming off as being to easy/close instead of distant/mysterious which is what girls are attracted to. So unless she's your girlfriend or your game is spot on and you already f closed this girl, you should avoid texting so much imo.

    Also in regards to her wanting to ski, she could just be lonely and genuinely just wants to hang out and that's it. You have hung out with her many times already and i just don't see anything happening imo at this point, not to put you down but this is how girls tend to be, things tend to need to happen soon or won't happen at all in most cases.


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