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  1. #1
    Bluenose10 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Continue this abusive friendship with benefits or no?

    This girl i know is toxic, she's a weak 7. She acts all good and she's on her white horse like many girls out there but she's no different then he rest of girls out there who are promiscuous. Talks to me like i'm her boyfriend saying "baby" and "i love you". While she's talking to and messing around with other guys. She's been flakey with plans which has been pissing me off, but what pissed me off the most is when we made plans in the beginning of the week to hang out on the weekend, the day of she says her schedule got switched and she has to work that night. I tell her ok cool i'll come visit at work, (she works at a restaurant), then she says she'll "be in the back all day replenishing stock" yeah ok bull shit. Then quickly goes to say they are also probably letting people go home early. She's such a bad liar, my suspicions were up of course at such a bad lie, so we ended up arguing because i knew it was bull shit even though i didn't care her out on it, we argued mainly about the flaking. A few days pass and I get confirmation she was hanging out with another dude in his room...Now i know i got a case of oneitis and this girl is toxic and i should forget her. Yet girls are really the only thing that excite me in this world, again i know that's really bad, you don't need to tell me. I'm lonely and don't get the chance to go out of the house much let alone be able to hook up with my friends who actually have some sort of game to go out with due to the fact we're all busy and schedules conflict.

    So my question is do i bite my tongue and just use this girl for sex like she uses me? I know i know i have to find other girls and destroy my oneitis. But do i keep this girl on the side? Or do i sit her down and have a serious talk with her telling her i don't like being flaked on and lied to like a chump and i know she hung out with another dude that day. I know that is 95% not gonna go well and destroy the friends with benefits thing but it's taking so much from me not to call this girl out between that and flaking, and she's got the nerve to act all good. Mind you this girl is also around me and my circle of friends often so i gotta basically live with her figuratively speaking.

    I've called her out and stuff before and she acts all apologetic but then goes back to doing the same bull.

    Do I call her out?(most likely to turn my bridges with her but it's what my mind and body wants to do so badly because i hate when shitty people do shitty things, makes me furious.) Bite my tongue? Mind you i'm lonely and it's p****

    I know i have a case of oneitis and it's very bad and destructive i know i know and i don't need you guys telling me that, i'm working on improving myself as a person and physically in the meantime. I want your opinions on what to do with this girl considering the situation at hand.

    Typical daddy issues girl.

  2. #2
    Slickwilly is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Continue this abusive friendship with benefits or no?

    Get rid of her! You're disrespecting yourself and your values/ beliefs just to get laid. I know, I've done it before, actually broke up with her, felt good about it, than a month later tried to go running back to her just to get laid. Not proud about that but I did it and moved on. Learned a lot about myself because of it.

    you know what you have to do, you're just afraid to be alone, so you posted this question in the hopes that someone will tell you to stay with her and put up with her crap. It's more comfortable to be with someone you know rather than approach someone you never met and be rejected. I know because I've done that before also.

    Good thing is, you've got friends, some of which I assume are girls. So start hanging around them more and ask em to set you up with there friends. Odds are they have other girlfriends outside you're group that they could set you up with and there's a good chance there a better person than the chick you're with.

  3. #3
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: Continue this abusive friendship with benefits or no?

    Does she hit you up for sex, or is it always you asking her?

    There's nothing wrong with letting someone come over to suck your dick and fuck you as long as you are looking to replace her in the mean time.....

    Does she have money? Ask her to buy you something for putting up with all her shit...

  4. #4
    Bluenose10 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Continue this abusive friendship with benefits or no?

    I ask her to chill more than me, but even when she asks me to chill on so and so day she'll end up flaking, very frustrating. It's easier for girls to have options because to get guys all they need to do is open their legs, while for guys to get girls they need to run strong game and lots of attraction has to be built correctly....so naturally...i've been hitting her up to chill more than she hits me up. It doesn't matter though, i'm done with her.

    She texted me some bull shit last night her saying she's not gonna bang me and she's trying to be a good girl basically so I blew up on her calling her out on all her bull shit and her shitty personality canceling our week long plan to chill to hang out with that other dude. I was drunk so I was definitely just gonna let it all spill out, it's a good feeling and better than having oneitis for this toxic girl. She said she was sorry and spewed a bunch of random bs....like she's afraid of catching strong feelings for me again and doesn't wanna do that because she knows she can't be with me (because i don't put up with her bs and don't just use her like other guys do)....which is all bs she just doesn't wanna give up banging a handful of dudes. I digress. I ended it off saying i don't wanna fuck her anymore, I want a girl I can chill with who is real, so cut the bs or don't talk to me at all.

    Today she texted me a bit with just some random small talk, i gave short responses back showing no real interest. She'll have to put a lot of effort towards me and basically come to my house to pick me up if she wants to bang me. I'm done reaching out to her, she's literally poison to my soul. Some girls can be such ridiculous liars, which bothers me 10 fold considering i've known her for years and always been real with her and she knows that yet still bull shits me. I'm done with her.

  5. #5
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: Continue this abusive friendship with benefits or no?

    Yea it's that kind of behavior that makes me fly into misogyny mode... it sucks... it's like you can't believe anything they say.... and yes all they have to do is open their legs, but I don't THINK all of them are like that... I could be wrong about this... if they are, then it leads me back to thinking why I live my whole life to impress a bunch of people that are going to act like this... I

    I think you just have to ask what is she offering you...

  6. #6
    Slickwilly is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Continue this abusive friendship with benefits or no?

    Quote Originally Posted by redstar1324 View Post
    Does she hit you up for sex, or is it always you asking her?

    There's nothing wrong with letting someone come over to suck your dick and fuck you as long as you are looking to replace her in the mean time.....

    Does she have money? Ask her to buy you something for putting up with all her shit...
    How is this guy not banned?
    and fuck this 30 letters thing!

  7. #7
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: Continue this abusive friendship with benefits or no?

    Why would you ban me?

    Why not let it ride until you find someone better?

    You said yourself that you would otherwise be doing nothing.


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