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Thread: How do you ask for sex?

  1. #1
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default How do you ask for sex?

    I am putting obsessive amounts of energy into fixing this area of my life... I don't want to be seen as the forum troll.... I did not go out tonight, but I will pose my questions for the day....

    1. How do you ask for sex? At some point, it is necessary to physically, verbally ask a girl to have sex with you. Who are they guys on here that get laid regularly? How do you ask? What words come out of your mouth?

    Do you just straight up ask... do you want to have sex with me?

    Can you describe the last time you've done this?

  2. #2
    Bluenose10 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: How do you ask for sex?

    Not an expert, but sex isn't something you verbally ask for. That's just weird and unnatural to "ask" that's just my opinion, it's not alpha to ask. Initiating sex is supposed to be more natural not mechanical. With enough attraction built up, displaying higher value, kino, isolation, kissing and just all around being fun and in the moment, sex should happen right then and there provided you are able to get the logistics right, like going back to her or your place or a car. If not sex should ideally happen the second date if you guys couldn't get a place to f close the first time you met, shouldn't take any longer than 3 or 4 dates at max to f close, if you hadn't by then, then work on yourself as a man because you didn't attract her enough.

  3. #3
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: How do you ask for sex?

    Quote Originally Posted by Bluenose10 View Post
    Not an expert, but sex isn't something you verbally ask for. That's just weird and unnatural to "ask" that's just my opinion, it's not alpha to ask. Initiating sex is supposed to be more natural not mechanical. With enough attraction built up, displaying higher value, kino, isolation, kissing and just all around being fun and in the moment, sex should happen right then and there provided you are able to get the logistics right, like going back to her or your place or a car. If not sex should ideally happen the second date if you guys couldn't get a place to f close the first time you met, shouldn't take any longer than 3 or 4 dates at max to f close, if you hadn't by then, then work on yourself as a man because you didn't attract her enough.
    How do you personally go about displaying higher value? And do you mean higher compared to her, or higher compared to the other guys she knows?

  4. #4
    Bluenose10 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: How do you ask for sex?

    You want to show that you're more valuable than her and other guys, the more valuable the more she'll want you of course, if you can look like the most valuable guy in the room, why wouldn't you?

    Displaying higher value is definitely the most difficult thing to do in my opinion, again i'm not expert so if someone here with experience can chime in if i'm wrong then by all means please do.

    Displaying higher value cannot be faked in my opinion, because to do so you really need that value. For example lets use a bar setting. Showing up to a bar with other alpha males having a good time together being happy and laughing and enjoying yourselves, being social with other groups of people (especially groups of girls) brings up your perceived value. Being friendly with the waitresses and bartenders and staff is always good, because they'll always be there and they're someone you can socialize with and get to know and you're gonna only seem more valuable/popular the more people you know and speak to in a bar. Basically the more popular you are the more you demonstrate higher and higher value.

    Of course it's ideal to show up with women or attract women and have them wanting to be around you and talking to you, this is kryptonite to any other girls because they'll be going crazy wondering what's so special about you since all these other women want you, they're going to want you to.

    I was at a bar this past weekend that this girl I made out with a few times on a few dates works at, she denied sex though, I didn't game her/attract her enough. Anyway she works at this bar I was at and at one point in the night I walked up behind a girl on a stool at the bar and she turned her head sideways to look back and talk to me, and as she did that i could see in my periphials that the hot babe that i hooked up with but didn't wanna bang me was straight up staring at me when she saw me talking to another girl, regardless the conversation was about nothing, that doesn't matter because she didn't know but it just looks good when girls are talking to you, shows value.

    Simple concept the more popular you are especialy with the women the more valuable you look. It's just the most difficult because you gotta win people over for them to feed your popularity, it can't be faked.

    I would say the easiest way to display higher value and attract other chicks in a public setting is to go out in public with an attractive lady friend if you have, and just have fun, other girls will be looking at you and wanting to meet you.

  5. #5
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: How do you ask for sex?

    Quote Originally Posted by Bluenose10 View Post
    You want to show that you're more valuable than her and other guys, the more valuable the more she'll want you of course, if you can look like the most valuable guy in the room, why wouldn't you?

    Displaying higher value is definitely the most difficult thing to do in my opinion, again i'm not expert so if someone here with experience can chime in if i'm wrong then by all means please do.

    Displaying higher value cannot be faked in my opinion, because to do so you really need that value. For example lets use a bar setting. Showing up to a bar with other alpha males having a good time together being happy and laughing and enjoying yourselves, being social with other groups of people (especially groups of girls) brings up your perceived value. Being friendly with the waitresses and bartenders and staff is always good, because they'll always be there and they're someone you can socialize with and get to know and you're gonna only seem more valuable/popular the more people you know and speak to in a bar. Basically the more popular you are the more you demonstrate higher and higher value.

    Of course it's ideal to show up with women or attract women and have them wanting to be around you and talking to you, this is kryptonite to any other girls because they'll be going crazy wondering what's so special about you since all these other women want you, they're going to want you to.

    I was at a bar this past weekend that this girl I made out with a few times on a few dates works at, she denied sex though, I didn't game her/attract her enough. Anyway she works at this bar I was at and at one point in the night I walked up behind a girl on a stool at the bar and she turned her head sideways to look back and talk to me, and as she did that i could see in my periphials that the hot babe that i hooked up with but didn't wanna bang me was straight up staring at me when she saw me talking to another girl, regardless the conversation was about nothing, that doesn't matter because she didn't know but it just looks good when girls are talking to you, shows value.

    Simple concept the more popular you are especialy with the women the more valuable you look. It's just the most difficult because you gotta win people over for them to feed your popularity, it can't be faked.

    I would say the easiest way to display higher value and attract other chicks in a public setting is to go out in public with an attractive lady friend if you have, and just have fun, other girls will be looking at you and wanting to meet you.
    You have to have that value where you cross the "social hook point" of the majority of the population of planet Earth. If someone doesn't like you, there must be a problem with them.

    What are these qualities that makes a person so socially valuable? I have not seen it in a long time. There are just certain people who are socially better, like the popular kids in high school, but as I get older, I see it more in business men. I have even seen DJs that showed poor social skills. I have only done this occasionally and temporarily while drunk, but I don't drink any more.

    It's a scary feeling to be so open with people. You are so VULNERABLE. It's like you have to remove all the hate from your body. It's hard.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: How do you ask for sex?

    Oh, my friend, what a feeling it is to be young and in lust! haha.
    Our buddy bluenose 10 is very intelligent and has touched on a great point.
    Being Higher Status (Higher Value/Higher Status, same thing)

    Walking into the bar with a bunch of girls draped over you is one way to show that you're higher status, of course. It shows that you have been Preselected by a group of females, and, therefore, other females will automatically think you are not creepy, douchey, or a wimp. They will see that other females think you are valuable. And boom, there you are, High Status.

    I understand that as a man who is just starting on his journey of badassery, you may not have that type of clout, just yet
    But there are other ways to show you are high-status, and they do not require anybody else's help. Although, I wouldn't encourage you to go to the bar alone. Go with some of your boys, of course.

    Being High Status has very little to do with how much other people value you, and a ton to do with how much you value YOURSELF. When you value yourself highly, others will as well. Other people will hold you in the same esteem you hold yourself. The previous sentence is worth rereading a couple times.

    So in order to come off high status, you only need to act high status by yourself, here are a few tips:

    High Status Eye Contact: When you shake a woman's hand, or speak with her, look her dead in the eye, and don't flinch.
    A rule of thumb that I tend to follow- If somebody is speaking to me, I'll look them in the eye for about 2 seconds, then look away to the left or right (never downward). If I am speaking to them, I'll stare deep into their soul for about 5 seconds, then look into the distance.
    Also, eye contact, in all cases, should be relaxed. Relax your face, don't get all tense and nervous.

    High Status Walk: Walk just a little slower than you usually would. Walk as if you have a gun, or a 12 incher, in your pants. Walk like a GUNSLINGER. Slow and steady. Draw your body up tall.

    High Status Vocal Tonality: There's a lot that goes into this one, but one quick tip is to always sound certain of yourself. Try not to trail off at the end of your sentences. This tends to happen if you say something slick, and you're not sure about it. Just own everything you say.

    Check out youtube videos of George Clooney, especially how he carrys himself in the Oceans 11 films. Notice how he walks, how he talks, even in high tension situations. Emulate that.

    Now, when it comes to the sexytimes, here's my advice:
    You have to build that sexual tension brother.

    Tease her about sexual things, but in a cool way.
    Say things like "I don't think you could handle me in the sack." "Oh, you're from LA, LA chicks are soooo innocent" (can be used with any city) "Are you trying to seduce me?" (That one works wonders if she throws you a shit test) "Seriously, stop doing that, you're getting me all hot and bothered" (blame it on her)

    Again it is important to OWN IT when you say these things, you can say them in a playful way (and you should) but don't raise your voice too high, and don't trail off at the end.

    Say things like that. Teasing, challenging things. Let her giggle or whatever. Play with it for a minute. Then (and this is the important part) switch the conversation back to non-sexual things. You don't want to hammer on the topic of sex for too long, she'll think you're a creep.

    It's good just to put it out there, then YOU be the person to change the subject. You can even tease her about it like, when you're on the subject of sex, say something like "Jeez, you girls only think about ONE thing...let's talk about something else." That's gonna make you stand out because most other guys would hold onto the subject of sex and bleed it dry of all of its tension.

    So you just keep pushing and pulling and turning up the heat as the night goes on.
    If you keep escalating verbally, and then start with some touching, then escalate that touching (put her hand on your leg, tell her to bite your neck while you're dancing with her), she'll be begging you to have sex with her. Problem solved.

    You're a champion man, and I know if you keep going out there and trying you're going to have success. I've been where you are and I know it can get discouraging. But if you keep seeking help and taking action no matter what, you will get this skill down. Before you know it, picking up women will become second nature.

    If you need any more specifics, let me know, brother.
    Jake Berreth
    Check out my dating blog:
    www.mostbadass.com
    Need 1 on 1 Private Coaching?
    PM me for details

  7. #7
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: How do you ask for sex?

    Quote Originally Posted by JayBee View Post
    Oh, my friend, what a feeling it is to be young and in lust! haha.
    Our buddy bluenose 10 is very intelligent and has touched on a great point.
    Being Higher Status (Higher Value/Higher Status, same thing)

    Walking into the bar with a bunch of girls draped over you is one way to show that you're higher status, of course. It shows that you have been Preselected by a group of females, and, therefore, other females will automatically think you are not creepy, douchey, or a wimp. They will see that other females think you are valuable. And boom, there you are, High Status.

    I understand that as a man who is just starting on his journey of badassery, you may not have that type of clout, just yet
    But there are other ways to show you are high-status, and they do not require anybody else's help. Although, I wouldn't encourage you to go to the bar alone. Go with some of your boys, of course.

    Being High Status has very little to do with how much other people value you, and a ton to do with how much you value YOURSELF. When you value yourself highly, others will as well. Other people will hold you in the same esteem you hold yourself. The previous sentence is worth rereading a couple times.

    So in order to come off high status, you only need to act high status by yourself, here are a few tips:

    High Status Eye Contact: When you shake a woman's hand, or speak with her, look her dead in the eye, and don't flinch.
    A rule of thumb that I tend to follow- If somebody is speaking to me, I'll look them in the eye for about 2 seconds, then look away to the left or right (never downward). If I am speaking to them, I'll stare deep into their soul for about 5 seconds, then look into the distance.
    Also, eye contact, in all cases, should be relaxed. Relax your face, don't get all tense and nervous.

    High Status Walk: Walk just a little slower than you usually would. Walk as if you have a gun, or a 12 incher, in your pants. Walk like a GUNSLINGER. Slow and steady. Draw your body up tall.

    High Status Vocal Tonality: There's a lot that goes into this one, but one quick tip is to always sound certain of yourself. Try not to trail off at the end of your sentences. This tends to happen if you say something slick, and you're not sure about it. Just own everything you say.

    Check out youtube videos of George Clooney, especially how he carrys himself in the Oceans 11 films. Notice how he walks, how he talks, even in high tension situations. Emulate that.

    Now, when it comes to the sexytimes, here's my advice:
    You have to build that sexual tension brother.

    Tease her about sexual things, but in a cool way.
    Say things like "I don't think you could handle me in the sack." "Oh, you're from LA, LA chicks are soooo innocent" (can be used with any city) "Are you trying to seduce me?" (That one works wonders if she throws you a shit test) "Seriously, stop doing that, you're getting me all hot and bothered" (blame it on her)

    Again it is important to OWN IT when you say these things, you can say them in a playful way (and you should) but don't raise your voice too high, and don't trail off at the end.

    Say things like that. Teasing, challenging things. Let her giggle or whatever. Play with it for a minute. Then (and this is the important part) switch the conversation back to non-sexual things. You don't want to hammer on the topic of sex for too long, she'll think you're a creep.

    It's good just to put it out there, then YOU be the person to change the subject. You can even tease her about it like, when you're on the subject of sex, say something like "Jeez, you girls only think about ONE thing...let's talk about something else." That's gonna make you stand out because most other guys would hold onto the subject of sex and bleed it dry of all of its tension.

    So you just keep pushing and pulling and turning up the heat as the night goes on.
    If you keep escalating verbally, and then start with some touching, then escalate that touching (put her hand on your leg, tell her to bite your neck while you're dancing with her), she'll be begging you to have sex with her. Problem solved.

    You're a champion man, and I know if you keep going out there and trying you're going to have success. I've been where you are and I know it can get discouraging. But if you keep seeking help and taking action no matter what, you will get this skill down. Before you know it, picking up women will become second nature.

    If you need any more specifics, let me know, brother.

    I go out alone all the time. I don't have male friends to go with.

    I own an apartment complex. Does that make me high value? I think it does. I see other guys with girls around them, but I think the guys themselves are stupid, and I think the girls are stupid much of the time also...

    I have been with over 30 girls, but most of them were people I met online...

    I have trouble initiating a conversation at this point, let alone making it last for any amount of time, let alone having it actually mean anything other than pointless talk...

    I think my only value is to add to my bank account, which I plan to do soon in droves through real estate investing... and this is what I mean when I say I have more value than the girls who have nothing more to offer than a pretty face...

  8. #8
    JayBee's Avatar
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    Default Re: How do you ask for sex?

    Ok so you're trying to improve your in-person approach skills then?
    I can help you with that.
    But first, answer a couple of questions for me eh?

    And if you have all of this "value", then why do you have all this trouble making friends and approaching women?
    Why do you think the guys with girls around them are stupid? Don't you want to have sex with women, just like them?

    Value is much more than the money in your bank-account, my friend.
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    www.mostbadass.com
    Need 1 on 1 Private Coaching?
    PM me for details

  9. #9
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    Default Re: How do you ask for sex?

    How have you been with over "30 girls", yet you're posing the question, "How do you ask for sex?"

  10. #10
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: How do you ask for sex?

    Quote Originally Posted by JayBee View Post
    Ok so you're trying to improve your in-person approach skills then?
    I can help you with that.
    But first, answer a couple of questions for me eh?

    And if you have all of this "value", then why do you have all this trouble making friends and approaching women?
    Why do you think the guys with girls around them are stupid? Don't you want to have sex with women, just like them?

    Value is much more than the money in your bank-account, my friend.
    I have trouble making male friends because I am extremely competitive. I see them as competition. I don't want to hang around them and waste time. The majority of them talk about stupid stuff all the time.

    I don't have that much trouble approaching women. I have trouble thinking of anything to say that isn't obviously some bullshit excuse just to talk to them. If there's something obvious to talk about, then I can say it, like "do you go to this school" or "what are you doing for Christmas?", but that depends on environmental circumstances.... and as much as I hate to rely on routines, I'm almost searching for a few good opening lines.... I've read the best people on other forums say that they say the same things as openers to every girl... one guy would say "will you marry me?" to every girl he went up to....

    You can work on inner game all you want... but you still have to say SOMETHING.... they will never just come up to you and spread their legs with no effort on your part...

    When I said the guys were stupid, I was talking about these drug-addict looking guys I saw with these girls last night. I have no idea if they were fucking the girls or not. I'm talking about the type of guys that walk around with hats with marijuana leafs on them like they're 15 years old hanging out with above-average looking girls. I KNOW I'm better than those guys.

    Then what is this value that I'm missing if it's not money in a bank account. But you also neglect all the effort that goes into putting that money in the bank account. Creative thought process, risk taking, etc...


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