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  1. #1
    Venjfel is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Worth moving forward?

    Gentlemen, signed up just now for some progression advice. Just found the courage to ask a Co worker out on a potential date. I engaged her with a bit of small talk then lead to saying "hey when your schedule frees up a bit let's go out sometime"

    She responded by saying yea sure but says she works most nights (implying that it would be tough) I then kind of nervously said cool let's chat about it over text. We parted ways after that. I find it hard to tell whether that was being Dodgy or just being realistic. Would you guys still try and text her the next day to see how her week is looking like? Or should I leave the ball in her court?

    I don't want to come off as too pushy.

    Mind you she's fairly shy and introverted so it's really hard to read her but we've had some slight flirting here and there but I find it somewhat tough to establish rapport with someone like her. Any thoughts would he appreciated.

  2. #2
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: Worth moving forward?

    Quote Originally Posted by Venjfel View Post
    Gentlemen, signed up just now for some progression advice. Just found the courage to ask a Co worker out on a potential date. I engaged her with a bit of small talk then lead to saying "hey when your schedule frees up a bit let's go out sometime"

    She responded by saying yea sure but says she works most nights (implying that it would be tough) I then kind of nervously said cool let's chat about it over text. We parted ways after that. I find it hard to tell whether that was being Dodgy or just being realistic. Would you guys still try and text her the next day to see how her week is looking like? Or should I leave the ball in her court?

    I don't want to come off as too pushy.

    Mind you she's fairly shy and introverted so it's really hard to read her but we've had some slight flirting here and there but I find it somewhat tough to establish rapport with someone like her. Any thoughts would he appreciated.
    I doubt she's shy or introverted in the right situation. She sounds like she's not into it all that much. I could be wrong, though...

  3. #3
    Venjfel is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Worth moving forward?

    Quote Originally Posted by redstar1324 View Post
    I doubt she's shy or introverted in the right situation. She sounds like she's not into it all that much. I could be wrong, though...
    I believe your right.. I've been out of this shit for awhile now and I think I'm seeing the small things like a touch here and a remark there as indicators or interest. I think my brains just kind of fucked up from too much pua stuff all at once thinking to be persistent and maybe just rushing it.

  4. #4
    cocotuiri is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Worth moving forward?

    Quote Originally Posted by Venjfel View Post
    I believe your right.. I've been out of this shit for awhile now and I think I'm seeing the small things like a touch here and a remark there as indicators or interest. I think my brains just kind of fucked up from too much pua stuff all at once thinking to be persistent and maybe just rushing it.
    I think you should text her one more time with a time and place and then wait for her answer. Maybe she is in to you but is really busy with her job! If you get an answer with a lame reason why she can't than you have to move on!

  5. #5
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    upperhandy is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Worth moving forward?

    IMHO... give it a couple of days...then shoot her a text

    hey! let's get together this week
    when's good for you?

  6. #6
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: Worth moving forward?

    Quote Originally Posted by redstar1324 View Post
    I doubt she's shy or introverted in the right situation. She sounds like she's not into it all that much. I could be wrong, though...
    You should go to clubs 4 -5 nights a week so that you see hotter girls than her all the time. That's probably what she wants to be doing, anyway.

    But, at this point, I'm not into the whole dating/monogamy thing... so if you are... then that's what you are looking for.

    It depends what you want out of it. Do you want to have children with her? If not, then is it worth seeing as something "serious?" And if it's not serious, then why would you commit to her in a monogamous mode, or even worse, why would you give her the full choice and option of DECIDING whether she ALLOWS YOU to be monogamous to her.

    I think the ball is way too much in her court, but what do I really know. Maybe nothing. And maybe I don't practice what I preach.

  7. #7
    Venjfel is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Worth moving forward?

    Quote Originally Posted by upperhandy View Post
    IMHO... give it a couple of days...then shoot her a text

    hey! let's get together this week
    when's good for you?
    Yea I think I've made my decision. I was going to but i'm definitely ignoring the signs. She's so emotionally unstable its crazy. She just got out of a year long emotionally abusive relationship (controlling boyfriend, highly insecure never wanted her to go out) and I guess she's just latching on to whatever can comfort her. I've been ignorant and I guess in scarcity mode seeing all these little things that I thought were IOI's when I wasn't seeing the bigger picture. Lowered my own standards just to try and please her and ended up making it awkward now.

    Which i'm totally fine with...Its always nice to get a kick in the arse to help reboot your mindset.

  8. #8
    Venjfel is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Worth moving forward?

    Quote Originally Posted by redstar1324 View Post
    You should go to clubs 4 -5 nights a week so that you see hotter girls than her all the time. That's probably what she wants to be doing, anyway.

    But, at this point, I'm not into the whole dating/monogamy thing... so if you are... then that's what you are looking for.

    It depends what you want out of it. Do you want to have children with her? If not, then is it worth seeing as something "serious?" And if it's not serious, then why would you commit to her in a monogamous mode, or even worse, why would you give her the full choice and option of DECIDING whether she ALLOWS YOU to be monogamous to her.

    I think the ball is way too much in her court, but what do I really know. Maybe nothing. And maybe I don't practice what I preach.
    That's the thing too, I kept fantasizing how it would be nice if we did end up dating and how 'awesome' it could of became but that was me being stuck in my head. I do want to find a companion and someone cool but truly I don't see that in her. Good insight though, thanks.

  9. #9
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: Worth moving forward?

    Quote Originally Posted by Venjfel View Post
    That's the thing too, I kept fantasizing how it would be nice if we did end up dating and how 'awesome' it could of became but that was me being stuck in my head. I do want to find a companion and someone cool but truly I don't see that in her. Good insight though, thanks.
    Wow someone actually listened to my advice.... I must be getting smarter....


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