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  • 1 Post By xavier

Thread: What is the value that I'm missing that prevents me from making approaches?

  1. #1
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default What is the value that I'm missing that prevents me from making approaches?

    I can ask people the basic fact questions, but someone on a different thread said I have approach anxiety because I lack any value that would extend the conversation past 15 seconds?

    What is this value?

    If it's different for every person, what is it for you?

    What value do you feel that you have to offer these girls?

  2. #2
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    xavier is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: What is the value that I'm missing that prevents me from making approac

    My penis and nothing more it's what she wants , other than that I'm an awesome cool fun guy and normally I am perceived as nice to talk to and hang out with.
    "The world will never change much less become what you want it to be. The only thing that can change is you. Face your fears, grow stronger and become what you want to be."
    _Xavier.

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    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: What is the value that I'm missing that prevents me from making approac

    Quote Originally Posted by xavier View Post
    My penis and nothing more it's what she wants , other than that I'm an awesome cool fun guy and normally I am perceived as nice to talk to and hang out with.
    Do you have any decent field reports?

    What do you talk about? Every guy has a penis.

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    Default Re: What is the value that I'm missing that prevents me from making approac

    That means every guy can get any girl, 'decent' field reports no, because I don't have time to write a 4 hour interaction!
    You still are under the impression that there is one way to game! as if all your interactions should go the same to get the girl. That doesn't exist ! Ideal game is only a myth !
    "The world will never change much less become what you want it to be. The only thing that can change is you. Face your fears, grow stronger and become what you want to be."
    _Xavier.

  5. #5
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: What is the value that I'm missing that prevents me from making approac

    Quote Originally Posted by xavier View Post
    That means every guy can get any girl, 'decent' field reports no, because I don't have time to write a 4 hour interaction!
    You still are under the impression that there is one way to game! as if all your interactions should go the same to get the girl. That doesn't exist ! Ideal game is only a myth !

    Well I am only one person with one identity... so maybe all mine should go approximately the same....

    Mystery says the same lines every time... I'm not trying to be something that I'm not....

    I still don't know what to say and this "lack of value," (as Alergy put it) that prevents me from approaching still exists...

    I have a dick... I can't exactly walk up to a girl and whip it out or I will go to jail and be a sex offender for the rest of my life and probably be on the news....

  6. #6
    althurber is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: What is the value that I'm missing that prevents me from making approac

    What he means by value is confidence in who you are and what you stand for. When talking with a lady, don't agree with everything just to make her happy, because in actuality that'll piss her off and you'll lose her attention and focus. Do you believe that what you stand for is right, unchangeable, and unmovable?? If so, you're good. You want to be a solid foundation of pure man, know who you are before you approach anyone. ANYONE!!! If you don't, you're just a run of the mill AFC that will always fail in life. Jobs, careers, social events, anything. I can't stress enough that you need to be confident in who you are, and if anyone dares to object, to hell with them, understood?? Value can also mean that you have money, means of transportation, a house, friends (and lots of them), and always have a good conversation starter such as her eyes, glasses, shoes, dress, lipstick (most pua's on here would think that's an impossible opening) but it is, and also, before you attempt to go up to a woman, always have a main topic in mind. Politics, religion, current events, Wall Street, etc. Anyways, hope this helps brother.

  7. #7
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: What is the value that I'm missing that prevents me from making approac

    Quote Originally Posted by althurber View Post
    What he means by value is confidence in who you are and what you stand for. When talking with a lady, don't agree with everything just to make her happy, because in actuality that'll piss her off and you'll lose her attention and focus. Do you believe that what you stand for is right, unchangeable, and unmovable?? If so, you're good. You want to be a solid foundation of pure man, know who you are before you approach anyone. ANYONE!!! If you don't, you're just a run of the mill AFC that will always fail in life. Jobs, careers, social events, anything. I can't stress enough that you need to be confident in who you are, and if anyone dares to object, to hell with them, understood?? Value can also mean that you have money, means of transportation, a house, friends (and lots of them), and always have a good conversation starter such as her eyes, glasses, shoes, dress, lipstick (most pua's on here would think that's an impossible opening) but it is, and also, before you attempt to go up to a woman, always have a main topic in mind. Politics, religion, current events, Wall Street, etc. Anyways, hope this helps brother.
    Okay... I don't let anyone change my opinions about things... that's never been a problem...

    But this is still turning into idle chit chat.... do I really want to talk to someone about Wall Street? Not in the least...

    I am beginning to realize that the frame of mind that I need to be in is that when I'm talking to someone for the first time, I should be kind of "screening" them to see if they are someone I want in my life... whether they be hot or not...

    However, this doesn't always work because it's kind of like playing a stupid game of "hard to get" when we all know why we're out... and, being a man, I'm the one who started the conversation in the first place...

    I know that the openers should be simple if all of the rest of the stuff behind it is taken care of... something as simple as "Hi, I'm _____" (my name)....

    But it's something about what is behind it that is lacking or missing.... I don't know what value I have to offer, except, like xavier said... a dick (and add a tongue and fingers to that).... but maybe that's all they want and all the "social" stuff on top is just a facade... who knows....

    There are lots of guys that are unmovable in their opinions that don't get any girls... it just means that their opinions are stupid or irrelevant.... that in itself is not enough to get them.... there is still something that is missing....

    Something about an underlying CHARACTER that the girls need to see....

    Hitler was unmoving in his opinions. That doesn't mean that he was a pimp. Get what I'm saying? That in itself is not enough.

    It is my underlying character that is what's missing. I am aware of this now. Who I am as a person. My personality is what is lacking and that is what is preventing me from making approaches. So now it's time to figure out what is wrong with my personality and fix it....

    To start with.... I am narcissistic, although I think I have a lot to back some of it up... I also have a certain antisocial aspect to me, which I don't really like and I don't know why it's there or where it comes from....

    I think I appear quick to anger and I have always had a temper...

    I think I just found my issue....

    What do you think?

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    althurber is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: What is the value that I'm missing that prevents me from making approac

    I say you pretty much answered your own question, you just needed a little advice and math to get your gears spinning. Also, it is important that you let her have her say on things. Ask her about her. Women love to talk about themselves. Ask her what her favorite movie is or you know, I wouldn't recommend this very often, but in certain occasions, if you know what you are doing, use the cube in the desert. Classic Mystery right there. Get to know a little about her with it, but study up on it hard before you use it. But yeah, you answered your own question brother. Good luck!!


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