Got a little story for you all to help you understand the situation I'm currently in, which is annoying as fark as I'm completely lost and have no idea what to do, so hoping maybe someone had a similar situation. If you can't be bothered to read it all you could pretty much skip to the bit after the hashtags
Last summer met these 3 student girls, a blonde and two brunettes. It also happen that they lived together in a share-house for 3 years so they're really good friends. Anyway they all went home for the summer and because the blonde one was moving her studies to another city after the summer, they started to look for a replacement. I happened to be the one. It also turned out that the blonde one was into me and I was into her as I thought she was best looking out of them at that time. So, Just before she moved out and I moved in, I went out with her a few times and ended up sleeping with her few times. However I quickly realized it wasn't it, but unfortunately she developed some feelings towards me. She still moved out and as I didnt really want to continue it, we basically said, ok no point dragging it, so whatever it was between us it has to end and it did.
Few months later I was home with one of the brunettes, and we watched a movie and we ended up having cuddles (no sexual activities, but was close). We both realized that we always had a very good contact with eachother and that we're attracted to eachother. She obviously was a bit backed away because she knew about me and the blonde but later on decided to not to worry about it, even if we have to hide or stay away from eachother when the blonde one comes around.
This brunette girl even if I feel she is my soulmate and I would give her 11/10 for her character, she's a HB7 with make up, without make up something like HB6/5. And now there's two problems:
1. Due to the fact that I've had quite a lot of women before, some better looking, I keep thinking that I can still find myself a better looking girl, even If I know that there's almost no chance of meeting a better looking AND with similar or better character, as I actually think she almost has a perfect character for me
2. Of course I cannot fool my heart and make myself fall in love with her, but because of the above I think I cannot develop any feelings for her...
I can't say we're in a relationship because we're not. It's weird it's like she's waiting for me to make the move and I have no farking idea what to do. I do not want to hurt her because she's a genuine good girl, as was the blonde but for some reason it still happened...
So Guys any ideas as of what to do or what not to do?
Thanks for everything, feel free to ask if you didnt understand something, in the end english is my 2nd language