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Thread: 'I'll call you later' Shit test

  1. #11
    JackSarge's Avatar
    JackSarge is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: 'I'll call you later' Shit test

    So what happened with the calling? (I mean her calling you not you calling her). Also what is your age range OP? Sounds like the usual stumbling blocks. I've learned things about women.

    Squabbles. These games you're playing (again not sure you're age) could be due to immaturity (I use that term lightly since I get pretty down and out).

    So I'm doing a lot better at least. Back on the up and up. Me and my woman now do not worry about such things. We can go any length of time without worrying about one calling the other. Any way it is a complicated relationship and probably the weirdest I have ever been in but yet we are still together for one reason or another (I guess it is like an on-and-off relationship but not due to me)

    Anyways the ways I have learned or should I say "trained" myself is to be casual. Casual, casual, casual. Meaning call or no call I am always trying to keep it casual. Learning to expect the worse with women leads to never being disappointed and always feeling impressed when something good happens. When something bad happens well I was expecting it! Mostly bad things happen in dealing with women.
    When you let go of your feelings you can really then embrace your surroundings
    Love is a game that's why I don't worry about it anymore. When you let go of your feelings you find your meaning.
    -Capn_Jack

  2. #12
    JackSarge's Avatar
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    Default Re: 'I'll call you later' Shit test

    Quote Originally Posted by Hands View Post
    Hey guys me again!

    So I work with this girl, lots of flirting when I see her at work, but doesn't happen often since we work totally opposite shifts. I finally got a date with her on Tuesday, things went well, it ended with a kiss close, I dropped her off at her car and drove away.

    Today I muddled things up a bit. I showed more interest than usual. I posted something to her FB, then started texting her a few hours later, the texting bit went well, I created tension by telling her over text that there was something I wanted to show her, but I can't tell her just what it was. She was receptive and asked what it was. I think I messed up when I called her, I wanted to talk to her, and used the excuse that I was driving, and couldn't text her back. She didn't pick up, and I left a message about how I can't show her this thing that was a part of my world, until she has shown me something that was a part of her world first, and that I would text her when I can. So I got where I was going and texted her this:

    *We were talking about jogging in the rain, earlier.

    'I only ran one mile, so it felt great, any more and the chafe monster woudl have had its way with me.
    I can't tell you what I have in store, but you know that I value experiences, and emotions above material things, so what I have planned lies in those realms. But you have to let me farther into your world first. What can you offer me that I haven't already experienced?'

    I basically repeated the voice mail I left her.

    She responds half an hour later with this

    Her:
    'Hey! I'll call you later this afternoon. I'm getting ready to go into an appointment. Not sure how long it's going to take.'

    Me:
    'Ok, enjoy yourself. I'll be working in the pm, so call me tonight if you want.'

    That was 12:34 pm yesterday, and our last communication. I feel like I've lost control of the frame, am I wrong? I feel strongly that I'm being shit tested, where do I go from here? Usually I just stay silent, and talk to some other girl for a day or two then open another line of communication. Any feed back is appreciated!
    Women tell me a lot of stuff and only half of it is ever true. I think recognizing the truth is half the battle to dealing with these delicate creatures.

    I've tried "many" and I mean "many" types of frame control.

    On the girl who qoute "doesn't want a boyfriend" "wants to stay single" etc
    I try runny the slutty girl frame and asking for the hookup, invite to get wet and wild etc

    In the end?
    Doesn't work
    (She starts acting like a nun)
    On the girl that qoute "wants a boyfriend" "looking for prince charming" "trying to get in a serious relationship"
    I try running the nice guy charm, try asking on a date, try courting her.

    In the end?
    Doesn't work (She starts acting like a slut...just not with me more at me)

    I've ruled out the possibilities and come to the conclusion that

    essentially women are NOT addicted to sex, relationships, or even privy to friendship. I feel they know all my ways. The ways of a man I feel (needing to get laid) they use to their advantage.


    Let's be completely honest here. Women make getting laid (at least for me a quote "hot guy") extremely hard. They act like they want me to be Prince Charming and then act like a slut or act like a slut and I treat them like a slut and they act like a nun.

    I have deduced the ONLY way to deal with women is the way I FEEL I WANT to act!!

    If I want to be sexual it should not be based on if she is acting like a slut (I got my first sexting going with a close friend which I never foresaw happening)

    If I want a girlfriend I should find one without looking for the "girl that is looking for a boyfriend"

    If I want a slut I should do so without worrying about finding a chick that is "appearing to be a slut"

    Essentially I feel women use frame control to their advantage so to even the playing field I have decided to again follow my initial reaction and DO WHAT I WANT as this is proven to be the most successful and proven method.

    If I feel like whoring around then I should whore around (again this should have nothing to do with the women I am talking to only the frame I am trying to present) and that in effect creates attraction.

    Because....
    It is usually the cold hard b!tches that warm up to me
    It is usually the nice girls that turn into bitter b!tches on me
    It is usually the women acting a certain way that stop acting that way

    So the best thing to go on is your initial feelings not based on what she does or says.

    This is why you are muddled when she told you she would call you and didn't

    You are stuck evaluating what "you did" which turns the frame control in her power and she has got "you" in the mind warp.

    The trick is not to fall into their mind tricks. Do again WHAT you want. In this situation if she said she would call you and didn't then you need to respond how you want to that and not guess about your own actions.

    I have come to determine that doing what I want is self-rewarding. I am not stuck endlessly trying to impress her. At the same time I am endlessly able to impress her by being cool with myself.

    Like standing you up or "not calling you" think that means she doesn't like you? Well I tried that. I told a woman she didn't like me for standing me up 3 times and she told me she in fact liked me a lot!! And so you can't qoute throw the rule book at them because they will always trick you out if you do that.

    Getting confrontational has helped. When they don't do something they said they would I have been confronting them lately. That has been helping me regain frame control.


    Try asking her why she didn't call you when she said she would. Try that. That is the answer you're looking for is it not?
    When you let go of your feelings you can really then embrace your surroundings
    Love is a game that's why I don't worry about it anymore. When you let go of your feelings you find your meaning.
    -Capn_Jack

  3. #13
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    Default Re: 'I'll call you later' Shit test

    Quote Originally Posted by Hands View Post
    NO! No I have not slept with her!

    The circumstance is weird, but I know that alot of it is my in experience with the game.

    This whole thing started right at the time I discovered this forum, so most of it is documented, here is the earlier thread if you need the full back story:
    Business, and pleasure

    This lesson has been repeated many times for me, that's why I started this thread. Here is a summary: We don't see each other often(once per week), and our schedule finally synched for a date the other day. She was definitely trying to friendzone me, and I worked my way out, then we made out for a while, and there was plenty of groping, had I some where to go I could have probably F-closed her, and the next day is where this thread picks up.

    Also update, I went into work today for multiple errands, and we saw each other for a few minutes. The first time she came in the room there were three other people present, I was massaging one of the other girls I work with(whom I teased into biting my finger twice, just not in front of the subject of this thread, this is not the girl I'm seeing tomorrow, I'm not even talking to her atm...but I'm gonna see where this goes, later) and only said hi to her, and kept flirting with the girl I'm massaging.
    She left and came back in, she needed the computer in the room, so I'm gonna assume she didn't come back to check on me. On our date she gave me a pinky ring, so I called her over and gave her a rock that I previously told her about, and told her 'Rock, for ring, we're even', she checked my finger for her ring, and I specifically wore a different ring given to me by another chick, she frowned, and I said jokingly 'You're not the only girl to have given me a ring.' and she walked over to where she put her stuff on the far side of the room. I kept talking to every one else, and made some plans to hang out with the other guy who was pursuing her(this is getting complicated).
    I was applying Tyrone's 'hot, cold' formula so I wasn't rude to her, and I maintained my alpha energy and just didn't pay attention to her, but I'm not sure if I was negging too hard.
    Any ways outside of this I haven't had any contact with her since this thread began.
    Honestly, she doesn't care about you the same you do about her. Moreover, you're seeking a reaction. Your attitude towards her is approval seeking, she knows it and she probably thought "lol, wtf? weirdo".

    You need to stop over complicating things.
    And by the way, whenever you're seeking a reaction you're not being alpha.

  4. #14
    Hands is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: 'I'll call you later' Shit test

    JackSarge: I'm 31, shes 27, I'm playing games because I'm trying to economize the amount of face time I have with her, had I even a few minuites a day with her I can get some where, but unless I drive into work on days that I don't work, I will literally never see this woman. Texting is a wall to hide behind, and I can't really generate real attraction through it, that is why I play games when I see her. You and your woman are not at the same stage that this girl and I are at. You and she are in a relationship, where as I'm just trying to get her to interact with me.
    I don't have a solid game plan, I just do what ever feels right at the moment, and it works for me, even with this girl, until the other day when I messed up, and I know what I did to mess it up, I'm trying to regain frame control, and recreate attraction.
    I'm not going to get confrontational with this girl, because it took me forever for her to even let me in, asking her why she didn't call won't do anything, because she was never obligated to call in the first place, Tyrone was right, she simply ended the convo, asking why means I'm putting stock in her word, and telegraphs that I'm affected by her inaction.
    Thanks for the post, it was a pretty long one, I appreciate your effort.

  5. #15
    Hands is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: 'I'll call you later' Shit test

    Lenric: You're right, you are absolutely right, she doesn't care for me in the same way I care for her. Not being alpha was how I lost control in the first place, I acknowledge this. I'm trying to salvage something that's falling apart, because the result I'm getting does not equal to the effort I put in, and I don't want to give up and cut my losses. Although I'm getting close to it.
    Is there anything I can do? Or is this where I just walk away?

  6. #16
    NMID is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: 'I'll call you later' Shit test

    I'd say, go cold man and she'll warm up to you. Stop trying this or that unless she is your little social experimentation guinea pig. Instead just do whatever you want man but don't lose respect, could lose your job. Stay cool and assertive. Just read, don't bother replying. Make her overthink for shits and giggles since she's clearly mindfucking you. Once she can't tap your mind she'll go for the other head.


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