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Thread: Dance floor game

  1. #11
    Mike413 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dance floor game

    Quote Originally Posted by Jironasaurus View Post
    Follow your gut instinct.

    And yes, it's a good idea to motion her to move closer towards you, BUT...

    ... before you do that, you must make sure you are having fun. If you aren't, no one's going to move towards you, no matter what you do.
    I get what you are saying but apparently it's not a good idea to go out there and dance by yourself. I guess I should just find a woman to dance with who I'm not really interested in first to get some kind of dance floor social value.

  2. #12
    Jironasaurus is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dance floor game

    "Apparently". Back when I was practising dance floor game, I was out there dancing alone sometimes. I still managed to get women from the dance floor despite that.

    Don't be restricted by the "rules" thrown about in the community. Get out there and find out for yourself what's true and what's not.

    That being said, you don't have to do this by yourself. Get a bunch of your friends and enjoy yourselves first. It's not easy having fun when you're out there alone.

  3. #13
    alphabeta is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dance floor game

    This takes 'Balls' the first time but it does get a lot easier with practice.

    Identify a target, within a group of three girls, or even one on her own and then without saying a single word, just walk over and take her by the hand, with the intention of leading her on to the dance floor.

    Where one of two things may happen.

    She will stay rooted to the spot, in which case you let go of her hand very quickly as hopefully no one will see you fail, so that you won't lose face.

    Or far more likely She will be flattered that She was the one that you chose over her friends and will enjoy the experience of being swept off her feet.

    By taking her hand I'm not suggesting that you try and drag her on to the dance floor, as that would be wrong but as soon as you take her hand She will know exactly what you mean.

    It should always be done in a gentle way, so She doesn't feel threatened and if she says no, then move on.

    Though in my own experience it works more times than it doesn't, especially if you can get a little IOI from your target before you move in.

    But when you are out on that Dance Floor, its essential you engage, as otherwise just the one dance, is all you are likely to get.
    The Power in a Relationship always goes to the one who cares the least

  4. #14
    Mike413 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dance floor game

    Well for one thing I don't really have any friends to go out with so that's out. No wing man either.

    As for approaching women on the dance floor. I don't mind putting my hand out and or gesturing for her to come out to the dance floor but I'm not going to grab her hand. I know that sounds alpha to some but to me it's a bit too needy. I think it's good enough to just go up smile and put your hand out. If she grabs it then I lead her out to the dance floor. If not I walk away and don't approach another woman for a while because they all probably just saw me get shut down. I'm sort of against dancing by myself though. It just seems low value to me.

  5. #15
    Jironasaurus is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dance floor game

    If you don't have friends to go out with, then that should be your most immediate concern. You can't expect to get good with women without having a lifestyle (and that involves friends).

    Search for meetup groups (e.g. meetup.com) for people who love to hit the clubs. Join them, socialize, and get into social circles.

    If you're having fun dancing by yourself, it doesn't matter. The fun will override the initial perception. But you have a limited window of opportunity in which you have to make something happen (aka getting a girl to dance with you). If you dance by yourself for too long, people will start to treat you as invisible.

    Take yourself out of the situation, and think of how you would come across to yourself in a club. You go in, you start having fun, people cheer you up... all good for a while. But because you are doing the same moves over and over again, you start becoming ordinary. Very soon, people will ignore you. So... go in, do your thing fast, get a girl to dance with you, escalate and then lead her out of the dance floor.

    Simple mechanics. Don't over-complicate the situation by thinking it's low value and whatnot. Focus on the learning process itself.

  6. #16
    Mike413 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dance floor game

    I'm going to disagree with you here. I've actually heard some people say they do better going out solo because they don't have the distractions of their friends. I remember I was involved with a PUA meet up group several years ago(there doesn't currently seem to be any in my area at the moment anyway)and I remember one time after a seminar at a guys house a bunch of guys met up at a club including myself. So here I was with a bunch of other aspiring PUAS. I remember one guy telling me to spread my legs in order to take up more space and look more alpha. So here I was expecting to have one of the guys wing for me or at least see these guys in action. So what actually happened? Well, all of them(and I do mean all of them)just stood around and talked to each other for the entire time. Here they were surrounded by young women and not ONE of them approached a woman(including myself). One woman even smiled at me when I was on my way out. How lame is that? A bunch of puas and yet all they did for about an hour was stand around and talk about game or whatever. I was rather disappointed and eventually just left(by myself admittedly).

    So I have to disagree that having a bunch of guys around me or friends will significantly help my game. Having one wingman might be a good thing but I'm pretty sure I can do this by myself, lonewolf style, and still be successful. I will be social once I get to the venues but I am not going to go out of my way to make friends to go to these places just to have some sort of social proof(a concept that is over rated and not necessarily even super important imo).

  7. #17
    Jironasaurus is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dance floor game

    You are looking at this from the micro level. I am focusing on the macro.

    Sure, going solo can work well when you want to approach a woman. Some people fly better that way.

    What I am talking about, is getting and keeping the woman in your life. As such, I stand by what I said. It's not just about having women see you with your friends. It's about a congruent projection of micro details that are built upon solid macro foundations; this, in itself, is lifestyle.

    In your example above, it's a picture (projection) of a bunch of guys not having fun (micro details), because they lack the macro foundations (lack of awareness - not knowing what to do in a club, lack of lifestyle - don't even know how to enjoy yourselves).

    Don't forget... the club is a closed environment where every one of you are easily being observed.

    Did you expect all the young women to get excited about any of you approaching them? Of course not. You guys weren't even enjoying yourselves. Was anyone in that group (including you) smiling and laughing, and just having a good time? Big bunch of guys, mind you (first up, that's already a cock-fest). No girls in the group. Instantly, that says so much already.

    I bet if you guys approached, you would likely fail within that immediate area.

    Here's what you guys should have done:

    Big bunch of guys broken into smaller groups (3-4).

    A picture (congruent projection) of 3-4 men enjoying each other's company and having infectious energy because you guys are just cool (micro details)... as part of their lifestyle activities (macro foundations with lifestyle already taken care of). Combine that with awareness (knowing what you need to do before you approach in a club; understanding club dynamics etc), and you're good to go.

    So, why you guys failed in your example above has nothing to do with whether you were with friends or not.

    In fact, lifestyle also makes it easier for you conversational-wise; you just naturally take care of issues like "what to talk to her about", "how to avoid awkward silences" etc. You just need 3-4 concepts to bear in mind after that, if you really wanna talk about conversational techniques.

    I've actually heard some people say they do better going out solo...

    ...

    Having one wingman might be a good thing but I'm pretty sure I can do this by myself, lonewolf style, and still be successful. I will be social once I get to the venues but I am not going to go out of my way to make friends to go to these places just to have some sort of social proof(a concept that is over rated and not necessarily even super important imo).
    Now, I wanna address one thing which I observed coming from you. It feels as if you are theorizing. I've said it before and I'll say it again:

    Get out there and find out your own truths.

    Don't assume anything before doing. Don't THINK that this is a good idea, or not. FIND OUT for yourself. You talk about stories of people going out solo, etc. They are just that - stories.

    You say having a good wingman MIGHT be a good thing. Well, find out for yourself by getting out there and doing it, lonewolf style or not.

    But at the end of the day, I want you to think about this:

    When you meet a quality woman (not some random chick that you feel you can drop any time, mind you... someone you really really want) in a club, and she asks you "Where are your friends?", what are you going to say?

    Let's take it a step further too. If she asks you to find them with you in the club, because she wants to see who this cool guy's friends are... what are you going to do?

    Another step further. If you and the girl are dating, and she asks you, "How come I never hear you talk about your friends?" OR... "When will I get to meet your friends?", what are you going to say?

    I admire the ballsy approach you have with going lonewolf, but think bigger picture (macro). Don't focus on the micro level so much. Play the game smart. Hardcore persistence can only take you so far.

    I can tell you this from personal experience... even if you go solo, you will find that there will come many times when you have to make full use of your environment in order to succeed. And that includes random strangers whom you have to make friends with, to get a table (in my country, tables go to those who buy bottles; not sure about yours), so that it's much easier to play the club game.

    OR it can be as simple as dancing with a girl, just to get another girl (social proof). Overrated concept or not, if it works, it works. Your opinion counts for nothing in the field, if it doesn't work at all.

  8. #18
    Mike413 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dance floor game

    I agree that the important thing is to look like you are out having fun regardless of whether you are in a group or not. Being in a group does not necessarily equal fun.

  9. #19
    Mike413 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dance floor game

    [When you meet a quality woman (not some random chick that you feel you can drop any time, mind you... someone you really really want) in a club, and she asks you "Where are your friends?", what are you going to say?]


    The truth is not everyone has close friends. If she is going to judge me based on that then she's not the kind of woman I want to be with anyway. Also, I could lie and say they haven't shown up yet but eventually she would be on to me. Or I could say they cancelled at the last minute(sort of a compromise between the two).

    I remember a long time ago briefly talking to a woman in a club who I struck out with who said she was waiting to meet her friends. Over an hour later she was still by herself. Apparently women do that too where they lie so they don't look bad.

    Her: Where are your friends?

    Me: I'm a mad scientist. I have no friends.

    Her: Oh I see.

    Me: You don't have a problem with that do you? That's more time you and I get to spend together at least until I get bored with you.

    If I can mix in with a bunch of people at the venue then to me that's good enough and at the very least gives the impression I am being social. Some guys make the mistake of going out by themselves and then waiting for one of the two girls seated to go to the bathroom. That's a lame trick and very low value. I am not afraid of approaching a group. However, I have decided that just because I have no group when I initially enter the venue that's no reason not to go out. The way I see it is it takes a certain amount of balls to go out by yourself(regardless of whether you are male or female)so I think some women will at least respect that even if they think it is somehow "low value." However, the woman who is right for me won't care because she will see that despite that I am a guy who is relaxed and fun to be around.

  10. #20
    Jironasaurus is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dance floor game

    I find it amusing how you seem to be making things difficult for yourself.

    Everything I have shared in my posts is a result of the experiences that I have accumulated over the years. Not just from my own personal experience, but from the people around me. I had 2 mentors, and along with that came a huge alumni crew (40-60+ people locally), whose collective experiences all contribute to everything I said.

    And one of the things we were taught... is to "make it easy for women to like you".

    What I see from you here... is the exact opposite. It's as if you strive to put obstacles in your own way.

    "The truth is not everyone has close friends", and that's because they consciously choose not to. You have a choice to make full use of what you have got, and add more to your "arsenal". If for moral reasons, you choose not to proceed, that's commendable. But what I am reading from you here is simply an unwillingness for unknown reasons.

    Quote Originally Posted by Mike413 View Post
    [When you meet a quality woman (not some random chick that you feel you can drop any time, mind you... someone you really really want) in a club, and she asks you "Where are your friends?", what are you going to say?]

    The truth is not everyone has close friends. If she is going to judge me based on that then she's not the kind of woman I want to be with anyway. Also, I could lie and say they haven't shown up yet but eventually she would be on to me. Or I could say they cancelled at the last minute(sort of a compromise between the two).


    The club is probably one of the most superficial environments for meeting women. It's enclosed, so everyone sees what everyone is doing.

    A woman dresses up in her best and heads out to an environment like this. The dressing up isn't for fun. It's because she's unconsciously aware that you better darn look your best in a place like this, or you will not get in with the cool crowd.

    And you're hoping to find someone who doesn't judge you based on whether you have friends or not. It's, for lack of a nice word, laughable.

    But of course, you choose to make things difficult for yourself by opting to lie.

    If she suspects that you're acting, and she decides to push her limits, she'll test you even more. In which case, you probably have to lie again to cover up your own lie. For your sake, I hope you are prepared for that.

    I remember a long time ago briefly talking to a woman in a club who I struck out with who said she was waiting to meet her friends. Over an hour later she was still by herself. Apparently women do that too where they lie so they don't look bad.

    Her: Where are your friends?

    Me: I'm a mad scientist. I have no friends.

    Her: Oh I see.

    Me: You don't have a problem with that do you? That's more time you and I get to spend together at least until I get bored with you.
    "I'm a mad scientist. I have no friends" will NEVER result in her thinking, "Oh wow. I am so gonna fuck this guy now!"

    While my example may have been a bit of a stretch, whatever response you give to her question - as a result of you heading out alone - is not going to help get you closer to your goal.

    Think about it from her point of view.

    "Is he actually alone?"

    "Why would he do that?"

    "Is he hiding something?"

    "Okay... mad scientist. Urm... what do I say to that?"

    These are some of the thoughts likely to run through her head when you say that.

    With the exception of the last thought, the rest of them only serves to plant doubt into her mind.

    The last one makes conversation difficult for you, because she wouldn't know how to respond.

    Goes back to what I said earlier - you are putting obstacles in your own way.

    If I can mix in with a bunch of people at the venue then to me that's good enough and at the very least gives the impression I am being social.
    Because a facade for a temporary solution is actually better than an actual solid solution?

    ...

    I am not afraid of approaching a group. However, I have decided that just because I have no group when I initially enter the venue that's no reason not to go out. The way I see it is it takes a certain amount of balls to go out by yourself(regardless of whether you are male or female)so I think some women will at least respect that even if they think it is somehow "low value." However, the woman who is right for me won't care because she will see that despite that I am a guy who is relaxed and fun to be around.


    I can't disagree that it does take balls to go out there by yourself. That much is true.

    But once again, you are running a very thin line between "respect" and "low value". If you are still amazingly fun to hang out with, that might go some way in the SHORT TERM to assuring a woman you are cool to hang out with.

    If you aren't, if you seemingly "screw up" in the slightest of ways, she will look for the smallest of reasons to reject you. Don't forget, unless you're the most amazing fella in the club, she always has a better option that she can go for.

    Let's also not forget that, in the long run, she will question where your friends are, and how come you don't seem to hang out with any.

    All these goes back to what I mentioned right at the beginning - making it easy for her to like you.

    Regardless, you may choose to disregard what I said in here. I reckon that my advice in this thread is done. Good luck with your journey. For your sake, I really hope things turn out the way you want, doing it the way you want.


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