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  1. #1
    Polarity is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Cold Cores, HPV and Poor Boundaries

    I had sex with a chick back in December. We've hung out as friends and been flirty and hand holding type stuff, but there hasn't been any kissing or more. Now we're talking about giving it another shot. She's open to having sex again. But there are some issues.

    She developed a cold sore after we had sex. It's since cleared up, but we're waiting until next month to kiss again. I realize that 50% has the HSV-1 that causes cold sores. It's still not something that I want. How long do you wait? How do you address this?

    She didn't tell me before sex that she has the dormant human papilloma virus (HPV). I think that can cause cervical cancer for women. We used a condom. It bothers me that she didn't tell me. Would you consider this a breach of trust?

    She tells me that she has an anger management issue and expresses poor boundaries. I don't know about the anger thing beyond what she says. She's really sweet when I'm around. The poor boundaries include introducing me to her friends and acting like we were dating at my company party and sending mixed signals.

    My big concern is that my scarcity mentality is rearing its ugly head. I've been on about ten first dates since the start of December. I feel like I'd be able to meet a woman as attractive and fun if I tried for six to eight weeks, but it's hard to sustain the forward momentum to find someone.

  2. #2
    scahill is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Cold Cores, HPV and Poor Boundaries

    You know you shouldn't go farther with this. You've said so yourself. There's red flags all over it.

    Do yourself a favor and bow out. Or just remain as friends if you want maybe.

    Find a better girl, healthier, more stable, etc.
    Get something positive out of something negative.

  3. #3
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    Vermillion is offline Geek PUA
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    Default Re: Cold Cores, HPV and Poor Boundaries

    Quote Originally Posted by scahill View Post
    You know you shouldn't go farther with this. You've said so yourself. There's red flags all over it.

    Do yourself a favor and bow out. Or just remain as friends if you want maybe.

    Find a better girl, healthier, more stable, etc.
    +1 risky shit, not worth. Give yourself time and think more clearly in the future (For the moment, I would let that girl in 'standby')

  4. #4
    Polarity is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Cold Cores, HPV and Poor Boundaries

    Find a better girl, healthier, more stable, etc.
    I definitely enjoy the unstable ones. But I get what you're saying about healthier and better. It's really tough for me to sustain effort when it comes to meeting women. I've been hitting it hard for two month fueled by a bad jealousy situation. I guess I'll need to look for some more jet fuel to get things going again.

    For the moment, I would let that girl in 'standby'
    Would you want a woman like this in the your 'standby'? It seems like she's down to just f*ck around. We're holding off on sex until next month due to the cold sore. I'm not going to be waiting around in the meantime. With the right expectation management, she's the 'standby' chick while I look for something better and healthier.


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