Hey everyone! I posted this in a different board and didn't have any luck. I'm just going to tell you the situation I'm in, what I've done so far, and what I've learned since. Hopefully I can get some good feedback.
My girlfriend has been acting more and more distant lately. She kept saying it feels like things have changed and what-not. I approached her to get to the bottom of why she's been acting that way. We were only seeing each other about twice a week, but she thinks we are spending too much time together.
I asked if she wanted to break up and she said no. I said we should take some time apart. She said that we didn't have to stop talking all together, but I flipped it around. I told her I need some time to think about things and figure out what I really want. The next day she asked what my schedule was this week. I said I'm working Sunday, so you can get anything of yours from my house you might need while I'm at work. She said she no, I wanted to know your schedule so we could talk about things. I told her I wasn't really in the mood to talk and for her to let me take my break from the relationship. That was 2 days ago.
I have not called or texted her or anything. Since then I found out that she has been thinking about this for a few weeks. An old boyfriend that lives 2 states away has been texting her recently. I think having him to fall back on gave her what she needed to make a move. She also was thinking about visiting him. I also saw a message where she told him she had been thinking about him and misses him. Her plan was to be distant and bitchy to me & thought I would break up with her. I guess that would make her not feel as guilty about going to see him.
She has no idea that I know what her plan was or that I know about her ex or any of the messages. I'm trying to figure out what to do now. I DO want to be with her and would hate for it to end. What should I do going forward? I will be out of town next week anyways, so I was planning on not seeing her in person until I get back in 2 weeks. I don't think her ex-boyfriend matters, because it's really about what's going on with our relationship that started that one up. I'm only going to use that info if I decide to break up with her, so I have a solid reason of her going behind my back to see him being her mistake.
This morning she texted "Happy Valentines. You don't have to say anything back. I just wanted to tell you." I replied and she said, "Sorry i disrupted your break."
I really don't know where to go from here. I'm not sure how long I should wait to send her another message or try to meet so we can talk about things. I want to make sure she is without me long enough to really miss me. I would love some good feedback. I think I've played this out pretty well so far. Thanks in advance!!!!