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Thread: It's Game Time

  1. #1
    Jackman22 is offline PUA in Training
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    I met this girl at work and I implied I wanted to see her on a professional level, but I really want to see her as a girl to date.

  2. #2
    JonTylerDiPrince is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: It's Game Time

    You've inadvertently framed the conversation as business, when you mean pleasure. "could we meet up later to talk?" Then you telegraphed your interest by saying you don't get to see her anymore at the bar. Now you have to figure out a way to change the intent to casual.

    "I just thought you were cool. We could be really good buddies [ smile, wink ]. Maybe I'll gossip dirty secrets about my girlfriends to you [ wink, nudge, kino, smile]."

    Frame HER as the friend. If you can then immediately flirt with other girls and get them to show IOIs (like right after saying this, in her presence), do it. Otherwise it'll basically be as good as you can expect without that opportunity.

  3. #3
    JonTylerDiPrince is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: It's Game Time

    You're way over-thinking about this. Especially about her "supposed" reactions. You have no way to know what she is really thinking or how she's reacting. With her friends and the 4+ set, do you honestly think that she put as much effort as you are imagining into debriefing them so they can ambush you? These aren't sh!t tests, they're just logistical concerns of coincidence.

    Just get to asking her out. "Hey, I think you're pretty cool but would like to get to know you better." You are more likely to screw things up by creating this elaborate structure when the pieces don't fall the way you want them to. It appears at every turn, this is already happening. Just ask her out already, and if she says no, move on.

    As AFCs, we put too much effort into one girl (or a small subset of them) because we think it's a fish on the line, it's our only chance, and all we have to do is figure out how to reel it in. But either the line reels in nicely or it snaps. Cast a new one.

  4. #4
    Jackman22 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: It's Game Time

    Well I met up with her and flaked and I don't think she likes me.
    Last edited by Jackman22; 07-19-2011 at 08:09 PM.

  5. #5
    JonTylerDiPrince is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: It's Game Time

    over-thinking again. who knows what she's doing. don't ever apologize for flaking. you gave your reasoning (big day tomorrow). Catch up on what? The years and years you've been apart after being such an important part of each other's life? you don't really know this girl and have not had any experiences with her. :-)

    If you're next exchange with her isn't asking her out on a date somehow, we're going to castrate you.

  6. #6
    JonTylerDiPrince is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: It's Game Time

    you probably need to spend some time thinking about something else. like school work. Give it some time.

  7. #7
    Jackman22 is offline PUA in Training
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    Should I take her to a movie? I can try a kiss close there?

  8. #8
    JonTylerDiPrince is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: It's Game Time

    Never a movie. Movies are for PASSING time together, not enjoying it. Dinner is hard too. Lots of awkward pauses you can't do anything about (food in mouth). Second option is the best so far; you can do coffee any time of day. Maybe a second place (mid-date venue change) to an ice-cream place or pet store?

    Try to think of something better where you can meet up, walk a little bit (to the first place, from and to the second place), so you can walk abreast, bumping into her shoulder lightly (like a 'yer-my-bro' kind of body check), touch her arm, etc.

    You must kino escalate, but you don't necessarily have to kiss. Sitting across from her at a dinner makes kino like this more difficult. If you're worried about how to pass the time. Make it into a scavenger hunt. Limit your date to an hour or two tops. Leave her wanting more.

    You could tease her a little too. Later, if you think a kiss is possible, lean in for it 80%, and then back away smiling and laughing. "NO! I don't kiss on the first date. You have to wait." [ smile, chuckle ]

    If this is your Day 2, she'll spread her legs on Day 3 if you've got the logistics figured out (make her come by your place before you go out, either to pick you up, or hang for 5 minutes while you finish up some schoolwork).

    Oh, and don't forget about Girl C. You should be working something out with her too.


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