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  1. #1
    brian604 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Advice and opinions on guys dancing

    Hey all,
    I'm a (male) dance teacher from Vancouver BC, I teach adult social casual dance classes at different studios. I'm looking for some advice from the community here because I've noticed that the turnout ratio is basically 10:1 in terms of a much greater female turnout. I'm sure we all know it's a good way to getting noticed but why is it that so little number of guys participate? I know that guys want to learn to dance but how come they're not taking some time to learn? If you were an afc why do you think you may not invest some time in learning how to dance?
    thanks a ton in advance,

    B

  2. #2
    nik's Avatar
    nik
    nik is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Advice and opinions on guys dancing

    So few people really need to know how to dance. Socially, the majority of the population can get by with grinding their hips on a person of the opposite sex while covered in sweat. Really knwing how to dance is only needed in very high social circles and for one's wedding.

    I used to be decent at east coast and west coast swing, but other than taking women to lessons (given by a former girlfriend), they played no part in the dating relationship beyond a different activity (compared with what other guys take women to do).

    There aren't very many clubs, even in big cities, that offer an appropriate atmosphere for the dances of bygone days.

    Country or hip hop are your choices in our current society. Country dancing still has partnered dancing, but the trend is evermore toward line dances or having hip hop songs mixed in with the country songs.

    For the record, very few women can dance, either; they are just more fun to watch.
    I have failed more than most men have tried.

    Every woman you pass up is a woman you will never have.

  3. #3
    gunsnglory is offline Official PUA Forums Moderator
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    Default Re: Advice and opinions on guys dancing

    Well I think dancing is more palatable to women if for no reason than it is marketed in film to women. Also, I think there is the perception that dancing is a "sissified" thing to do unless you have to. So a lot of guys steer away from it for that reason.

    Guys don't like to be told what to do. This is especially true when it is something physical, and double the case when it is something that they already feel slightly emasculated or nervous doing. It doesn't help that the stereotype is that women can dance way better than men naturally.

    I personally find dancing to be one of the most boring physical activities I can think of. The only reason I even learned how to dance a little bit is because it is useful in getting women.

  4. #4
    xero007 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Advice and opinions on guys dancing

    Probably for the same reason I don't see many female motorcycle racers. Men find it a boring activity.

  5. #5
    Jack Greezy is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Advice and opinions on guys dancing

    Quote Originally Posted by nik View Post
    So few people really need to know how to dance. Socially, the majority of the population can get by with grinding their hips on a person of the opposite sex while covered in sweat. Really knwing how to dance is only needed in very high social circles and for one's wedding.

    I used to be decent at east coast and west coast swing, but other than taking women to lessons (given by a former girlfriend), they played no part in the dating relationship beyond a different activity (compared with what other guys take women to do).

    There aren't very many clubs, even in big cities, that offer an appropriate atmosphere for the dances of bygone days.

    Country or hip hop are your choices in our current society. Country dancing still has partnered dancing, but the trend is evermore toward line dances or having hip hop songs mixed in with the country songs.

    For the record, very few women can dance, either; they are just more fun to watch.
    Agreed.. Bump and Grind

  6. #6
    brian604 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Advice and opinions on guys dancing

    WOW,
    I'm now very confused - I have a few private 1 on 1 classes where I teach 25 - 50 some odd year old male how to become comfortable on the dance floor. They mainly do it so they can fit in and not look awkward - not even talking about competitive dance or showy stuff, just basic 2 step with a clap and some very very basic upper body grooves. The ones I teach are actually quite motivated to get the feeling of the dance down.

    I've been wondering why not all guys want to at least get some of the basics since most of them look so bad on the dance floor but now people here are saying it's just something guys DON'T want to do?

  7. #7
    Svemir is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Advice and opinions on guys dancing

    By learning how to dance you will add value, girls like guys who know how to move. You guys all missed something important, you can escolate more on the dancefloor and she wan't feel bad if you go to far sometimes , cuz it was ''only a dance'' , and you can get her horny. If girl se that you have a good rythm she will asume that you have a good rythm in bed too. So go and try .


    And it doesn't metter if only few girls can dance, you will be the ONLY PUA in the club who can - and that can't be bad. If it doesn't work you can always stop dancing .

  8. #8
    KennyPowers's Avatar
    KennyPowers is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Advice and opinions on guys dancing

    It all depends on the situation really, why you are out. Are you out to just have a good time? Then by all means... "Cut a rug, drop it like it's hot!" However, if you are out sarging it depends. You may dance if your target is not, but if your target happens to be on the dancefloor then dont dance. Wait till she is returning from the restroom and open, or when she goes to the bar for a drink to open. Me personally, I dance as a form of exercise, and yeah I show off in the club sometimes but when im sarging I refuse to dance to avoid the "dancing monkey" label. So with that said...If you are out just cutting loose, having fun-by all means go for it if you want to. But if you are sarging, avoid the dance floor...it's a trap.

  9. #9
    nik's Avatar
    nik
    nik is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Advice and opinions on guys dancing

    Quote Originally Posted by brian604 View Post
    WOW,
    I'm now very confused - I have a few private 1 on 1 classes where I teach 25 - 50 some odd year old male how to become comfortable on the dance floor. They mainly do it so they can fit in and not look awkward - not even talking about competitive dance or showy stuff, just basic 2 step with a clap and some very very basic upper body grooves. The ones I teach are actually quite motivated to get the feeling of the dance down. (1)

    I've been wondering why not all guys want to at least get some of the basics since most of them look so bad on the dance floor but now people here are saying it's just something guys DON'T want to do?(2)
    1. Right, the guys who go to a dance instructor are motivated to learn to dance. That makes so much sense. I'm buying it.

    2. If you refer to my initial post, you will see I posted "need" nothing about "want". For a PUA, there is no need to be able to dance well. The bump and grind will suffice.

    Who do they look bad to? You? Why would a confident man, who is having fun on the dance floor, care what another man thinks? (They do, but it can easily be dissolved by grabbing the nearest woman and grinding on her ass.)
    Women? There are so few guys dancing, at first, any guy can get women to dance with them and most women are just glad to have the company. After everyone is drunk, women can then be selective. For a man to keep her attention, he has to make an impression off the dance floor.

    The best dancer, with no real game, will dance with a lot of women. A man who is willing to dance and has game to make her feel special on and off the dance floor, will have a shot at taking her home. Same as a man who has game and no dancing ability, at all.

    I don't think anyone on here would turn down the ability to dance well. However, the time and effort it takes to dance well would be better spent working on other areas of ourselves. There is no NEED (in most circles).

    Personally, I try to have a broad range of experiences in my life. I describe my dancing ability as: Expert to the unknowing, but pathetic to those in the know. That has worked well for me. Being perceived as knowledgeable or good is often better than actually being knowledgeable or good. I have found that those who truly wish to excel at something have to dedicate most of their time, energy, and even themselves to it. (If you want to take a jab at me, personally, here's your chance.)

    My former girlfriend, the swing dancer, made it in a backup role of one of those big swing films a couple of years ago; traveled all over doing competitions. She didn't get much done outside of dancing. This limited her social interactions to those who were also dancing "professionally" . Dancing, in fact, made her less of a well-rounded individual.

    Quote Originally Posted by Svemir View Post
    By learning how to dance you will add value, girls like guys who know how to move.(1) You guys all missed something important, you can escalate more on the dancefloor and she wan't feel bad if you go to far sometimes , cuz it was ''only a dance'' (2), and you can get her horny (3). If girl se that you have a good rhythm she will assume that you have a good rhythm in bed too (4). So go and try .

    And it doesn't metter if only few girls can dance, you will be the ONLY PUA in the club who can (5)- and that can't be bad. If it doesn't work you can always stop dancing .
    1. True, with caveats.

    2. Possibly true, but without major game, most women aren't going to let you pick up at the bar where you left off on the dance floor. There is almost always a line in the sand; you two were, after all, just dancing.

    3. You can get her hornier and more actionable by words and subtle touches. Most women don't get nearly as horny as men do when dancing provocatively.

    4. Possibly, until she has sex with a guy who can dance well and a guy who has no dancing ability. Dancing, like sex, can be learned. I used to think the woman on the dance floor who could really work the floor would be a Goddess in bed, until I slept with a few. Same with exotic dancers. Sure, what they are doing looks awesome; not always true when you're inside her.

    Women who can dance tend to be in better physical condition and more flexible, which adds to their sexual ability, but do not necessarily make her good in bed.

    5. That's a bold presumption with no meritable backing.


    Quote Originally Posted by KennyPowers View Post
    It all depends on the situation really, why you are out. Are you out to just have a good time? Then by all means... "Cut a rug, drop it like it's hot!" However, if you are out sarging it depends. You may dance if your target is not, but if your target happens to be on the dancefloor then dont dance. Wait till she is returning from the restroom and open, or when she goes to the bar for a drink to open. Me personally, I dance as a form of exercise, and yeah I show off in the club sometimes but when im sarging I refuse to dance to avoid the "dancing monkey" label. So with that said...If you are out just cutting loose, having fun-by all means go for it if you want to. But if you are sarging, avoid the dance floor...it's a trap.
    You've put a lot of strategy into this; much of which, is flawed. The guy who is there cutting loose, having a genuinely good time, is going to attract more women than the average PUA who is trying to look cooler than the rest of the guys.

    I agree with the dancing monkey bit; however, why are you caring what guys think? Women don't label men that way.

    I don't go out "sarging". I am always just trying to enjoy myself and increase the fun level of those around me. I enjoy myself most around women. Therefore, I surround myself with them.
    I have failed more than most men have tried.

    Every woman you pass up is a woman you will never have.

  10. #10
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    KennyPowers is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Advice and opinions on guys dancing

    You bring up some great points Nik


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