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Thread: Social Anxiety

  1. #1
    Hylo is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Social Anxiety

    How would you advise someone with a lifetime of social anxiety which holds him back from achieving alot in life whether its interms of women or other stuff..

  2. #2
    Mr8Hyde6's Avatar
    Mr8Hyde6 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Social Anxiety

    The best way is to work to get rid of your anxiety bit by bit. It isn't a simple 1, 2, 3 process. Anxiety stems from a lot of inner issues that develop while you mature in life. It can stem from early childhood, to parent upbringing, or even a single event.

    General anxiety can seriously inhibit living and enjoying life, be it from being nervous at job interviews, to meeting new people, to even potentially finding the woman/women of your dreams.

    I was always a smart kid growing up, but I always was scared to speak up and voice my own opinion (probably why I post on blogs and forums so often). However, looking back, I realized I seriously have held back on life because of that. And, also looking back, I realized that I should of never had anxiety to begin with because it was never rationalized.

    Anxiety is a reaction that we experience to an environment we are uncomfortable with. However, most anxieties are completely irrational and not justified. You have to remember that. Simple techniques to get over that panicky feeling are to just breathe and count to 10. Tell your mind you are relaxed. Mind over matter. Your mind can tell you and make you believe many things. As it makes you feel irrational anxiety, you can also switch it around and make it feel confident. By just simply telling yourself you are okay, you are confident, you are the man... It does the trick. It takes practice, but it will eventually work.

    An easy way quick fix way to conquer social anxiety is to just face it flat out. Approach many many many women and expect nothing out of them. Say one thing to them, be it for the time, directions, or to compliment their hair. By doing this and expecting nothing back, you are telling your mind that nothing really bad will come out of it. So what, maybe you will get rejected, a weird look, or a smart remark. But is that the end of the world? No. You learn to adapt. You also conquered your anxiety a little bit more.

    Just go out in the world, talk to complete strangers, smile at them. It all helps chip away at that cross on your back called "anxiety". It is just a fragment of your imagination. You are the only one who can help your anxiety out. So go out, and stick it to em.

  3. #3
    JB21 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Social Anxiety

    Nice post Hyde.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Social Anxiety

    Thank you.

  5. #5
    Hylo is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Social Anxiety

    Thank You for your comments.

    I am trying to seek ways to maintain emotional control and self discipline, It seems the best way to get over and control your emotions as life comes naturally with ups and downs and you have to survive them.

    Im looking for any kind of resources or system to follow in life that allows me to live in control and discipline.. Would appreciate something handy.. but no self help book non-sense, they just fill your head with a false sense of confidence..

    Oh and I find Vladimir Putin a great alpha man.. His military background definitely shaped him as a calm, disciplined and somehow cold individual..

  6. #6
    Playa's Avatar
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    Default Re: Social Anxiety

    Did you guys read Bill's latest blog post:

    How To Become Fearless | PUA Forum Blog

  7. #7
    TangoFoxtrot is offline Banned
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    Default Re: Social Anxiety

    WSF, there are ways to overcome anxiety--and they don't require meditation, chanting, etc.....It does require work, however, since you're overcoming irrationalities your own mind is creating. I think Hyde has some good ideas about approaching women with zero expectations.

    BUT there are other approaches as well. One of them is to change the dynamics all together and to change the rules and the environment so that they suit you more favorably.

    One of my best friends was shy growing up. He went bald at 16 and is still overweight. Not exactly the image of a face man. But, he changed the rules in his life and developed an approach / method to seducing women with his words. He set it up in a way where he could control the situation, chose his words carefully and let them run riot through a woman's mind. Once he gets them wet and steamy, it doesn't matter what he looks like or how awkward he feels inside. The chicks want him--period. It has worked beyond his wildest imagination.

    My buddy has been refining and sharing his system with me. If you'd like to learn more about it, let me know.

  8. #8
    Hylo is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Social Anxiety

    Well im not talking about chanting or medidation and i dont buy any of that crap but Im looking for changing/managing the way I live my life on a daily basis that could help me make the best of my time and self, so far kick boxing for the past 7 months changed alot of habits in me but I like to take more control on my life and prevent things such as anxiety, hesitation or laziness to make me from achieving things.

    I personally have no life for the past 2 months other than 6 days of work and the boxing gym yet I dont feel bad about it but would like to spend this time on improving myself further as an individual.

    I do look back 7 months ago and i see that i changed alot in myself which makes me know I can do much more and I look forward to it.. Cuz women I see AS secondary as long as I know im working on or achieve the goals I have for my life, future, etc..
    Last edited by WSF; 08-11-2011 at 12:03 AM.

  9. #9
    Hylo is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Social Anxiety

    Quote Originally Posted by Playa View Post
    Did you guys read Bill's latest blog post:
    I never buy any of this PUA crap but ventured into it out of curiousity but this guy makes sense so far reading thru it.. 30 pages, heck this is how books should be..

  10. #10
    Einstein is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Social Anxiety

    ^ I loved that report. Huge fan of their work.


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