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  1. #1
    Steve31 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default SO CONFUSED mixed signals Please HELP

    i know its long but please read

    So ive known this girl thats in my college club for about 2-3 weeks and when we first met i was getting a lot of IOI's(always looking at me, coming to sit around me after i was already there, laughing at my jokes even the less funny ones). i number closed her in the gym by pretending to not see her, and she came up to me "Look who it is!" the club was having a pizza party type thing and she asked if i was going, i said idk i dont have anyones numbers and i dont know when it is.she said "here ill give you my number" so we hung out a couple times in a group setting..i was still getting IOI's from her. Eventually i texted her saying somthing like "hey we should get to know each other in a non-group setting" she asked "like a date" i said "not necessarily" to make sure the hang out was a low pressure event. i told her we should take a walk around the local city...she said yes and that she hoped the weather was going to get better (bc it was raining alot) and i said "i bet its jst bc u want to see me =p) *cocky funny* and she said haha maybe ...anyway so last thurs. i picked her up for our walk around town. she wore a lot of perfume..which she hadnt done when we hung out in the group settings making me think she saw it was somthing she had to get "dolled up for" making me think she thought it was more than freinds hang out...so we walked around and went in some stores...we told each other a lot of stories about ourselves and she would be very passionate when describing them to me...when we got back she said she had fun, i asked what she was doing tom. (last Fri) and she said she was maybe going to the on campus dance club..i said that she should let me know if she is so we could meet up there bc i norm go there. she said okay...so the next morning when my car smelled very strongly of her perfume...i texted her saying "hey my car smells like you so i thought id say hi lol" *idk if this is a weird thing to say* but she said "i didnt know i had a distinct smell..." i was caught really off guard by this and felt like i offended her?..i just said back "oh well your perfume does"...i think she said "oh okay"...looking back i should have maybe added "and it smells good"---anyway that night i went to the dance club with my friend (she didnt text for the rest of the day) shortly after i got there she left (but i highly doubt she saw me)...like an hour later after me and my friend left i decided to text her to see what she was doing bc we didnt want our night to end she said "oh i left bc i didnt like the music there) ive noticed that im always the first to text and that when she does text back she is very delayed(i made my texting delayed also to not seem needy to to available)...so i decided to see if this was true and not text her first...so of course i was right and we havnt talked since that Friday night...however, today we had our club meeting..and i needed to know somthing about her friend (club related) so i went up to her and said "hey" she gave me a smile and a "hey steve" i think the fact that she said my name is an IOI maybe not...anyway as i was asking about the friend she got all blushed and red and seemed kind of nervous...so needing to know about the friend i texted her tonight asking about the freind. she is still very delayed...

    anyway i am wondering what your opinions of this is...she does like me? was i too needy and availible...do i have a one-it-is (as style put it) do i need to come on stronger. is she intimidated bc i am a soph and she a fresh...or is she not interested ...if you need more info ill be glad to share it..it will just be good to have outside perceptive

    my gut tells me that she likes me and my self-conscience limiting belief is holding me back...i feel like asking her definitively what she thinks of me or w.e but thats def putting her on the spot ..so i guess whats a more indirect way of figuring out what she thinks without putting myself out there, since i do have to see her again for the club (not the dance club place)
    Last edited by Steve31; 09-14-2011 at 10:00 PM.

  2. #2
    studmuffin52 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: SO CONFUSED mixed signals Please HELP

    your gut feeling is correct, she does have indications of interest, you are being a little too caring about the situation and trying to control too much, have more fun and you'll be fine....

    remember, ironically, if you show more interest, then the girl tend to back off, so keep doing what you did at the beginning.

  3. #3
    In The Tropics's Avatar
    In The Tropics is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: SO CONFUSED mixed signals Please HELP

    I agree with what Studmuffin said.

    I think that you should not have said that her perfume smelled good though. It's good you didn't. That was a good opportunity to throw a little neg at her. Something like "Wow I can still smell your perfume in my car." That way its sort of backhanded and makes it look like she is trying to hard, but not like you are actually insulting her. Also, she wouldn't have asked if it was a date if she didn't want it to be. You should have been cocky funny there like "Woah! I think you are taking this way too fast."

    Remember another thing Style said. "If you think you can get her, You can."

  4. #4
    Steve31 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: SO CONFUSED mixed signals Please HELP

    She was showing IOI's all last week but recently since ive been trying to semi-freeze out i havnt seen here, and her texting has gotten even worse(more delayed couple word answers) i think that my txting game is horrible..but i said somthing like we havnt had a movie night in a while, and she said somthing like oh we havnt had a movie night in a while, we had 1 but it was just a couple of people...so i tried to tease/be playful back and i said ohhhh i see an exclusive movie night...--maybe she couldnt see the playful undertone but she didnt say anything back

  5. #5
    In The Tropics's Avatar
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    Default Re: SO CONFUSED mixed signals Please HELP

    Yeah man. Sounds like you need to freeze this girl out. She will wonder why she all of the sudden lost your interest and it will spike hers back up. Also, avoid oneitis. Make sure that you are not getting caught up in one girl. I tend to find myself doing that sometimes, and I always work to find more girls to talk to. Every MPUA will tell you they have thousands of rejections and that is how they perfected their game.

    I suggest you go out with a buddy and work on sarging some girls. At first it will be a little difficult, but the more you do it the better and easier it will get. you should make a point to do this regularly. It will build your confidence and make you second guess yourself less. I have been doing this consistently for about 4 months now and have seen dramatic improvement.

    what is your experience level on pick up? I mean if you have 5 different girls you are working after, one will not matter so much, and she will sense it and know it.

    Also, if a girl blows you off you are a lot less effected by it when you have 5 or more on standby.

    Also man. I only text girls if I am giving then Sh1t, or setting something up. Usually when I am planning something I pick the phone up an call. You can read a lot that way.

    Its sort of like the false time constraint that should be used when talking to a new set. If you always seem available to text the girl will be thinking "man when is this dude going to stop texting me and leave me alone."
    Last edited by In The Tropics; 09-20-2011 at 12:06 PM. Reason: needed to add some more

  6. #6
    Steve31 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: SO CONFUSED mixed signals Please HELP

    Ya i am new to the pua, and havnt really found anyone to sarge with, ive been doing the best i can by myself...also i have been trying to "freeze" her out but have not really seen any results...should i move onto the next one?

  7. #7
    In The Tropics's Avatar
    In The Tropics is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: SO CONFUSED mixed signals Please HELP

    You need to find a wingman. I would say that you should wait about a week or maybe even 2 and then try texting her. You should always be working more than one girl at a time. Instead of saying on to the next one, i would say you should spend more time on other ones at the moment.

  8. #8
    Steve31 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: SO CONFUSED mixed signals Please HELP

    I actually have an update...her friend actually told me that she didnt want to be more than friends...i could have put myself into friend zone..however she also stated that she has never had a bf b4 college and hasnt been with anyone...i think that if an attractive girl hasnt had any relations something is amiss and she could have been getting feelings and just got freaked out

  9. #9
    In The Tropics's Avatar
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    Default Re: SO CONFUSED mixed signals Please HELP

    I would just move on then dude. I still suggest getting out and gaming multiple girls.


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