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  1. #1
    cesarei is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Need help with a girl that i met online then met physically.

    Hot 10.
    Look guys.
    Im average looking, maybe a little above average. Iam 173 cm tall. I have a good education, sociable and considered by most " a cool guy", probably a little "psychotic".
    There's this chick that added me on fb like 1 year ago. I used to ignore or mock here at the beginning. Not because I was playing , just because I didn't like her type although she was hot. Like 6-7 months ago we started to have conversations and I started to talk to her not ignoring her. I kinda started to like her but she didn't know anything. The thing is, I don't know how to tell if a girl likes you at all. I was playing the cards pretty good. She also knew I wasn't interesting in being friends with her since the beginning. She knew from the beginning I was looking for something more. The reason why I didn't ask to meet was because I study in another country while she lives back to the country im from.

    Like 3 months ago we started to talk everyday together for at least 3 hours a day. We got really close. When we were kinda joking , when I used to talk to her about the boyfriend-girlfriend conversation she always had a postitive reaction but one day , like 2 months ago when I decided to talk seriously she told me we were just friends . So I cut the bullsh1t out. I stopped talking to her. She'd always come back and talk first telling me stuff, sending me different kinds of messages , sometimes nice one , sometimes : Hi , I have a boyfriend XD.

    We had a lot of fights this summer. Anyways I got back to my country and we were supposed to meet.
    Everytime she told me she had a boyfriend I ignored that fact. Everytime we used to fight with messages and she somehow came back and talked first.
    Always. As soon as she talked back I started to talk about getting in a relationship and that was the start of another fight so she could come back to talk first after 4 days. I didnt meet her the 1st time I went to her city. We had a fight sending messages. Once she told me she wanted to meet, then she didnt, then she did want to meet but her boyfriend didnt let her.

    Once she told me she didnt want a relationship because Im too cocky and i behave like a d1ck , another time coz of the distance , and another time coz she didnt like me, another time the three of the reasons at the same time. Anyways she'd always come back to talk. I met her the 2nd time I went to ehr city. The good thing about this is that i didn't get disappointed.
    She was exactly the way we had talked on facebook and of course my self confudence was the same.
    The bad thing about the meeting was that day i was with a friend and I had told him if she comes alone you have tto go , and that farker didnt go. -.- So the frist time i met her , there was three of us. Anyways i didnt go into a serious conversation boyfriend girlfriend but she did some "good thinks", she firstly put her arm around my neck. She had asked me to bring some necklace from italy to her and i of course didnt bring it . So she told my friend : do you buy gifts to your girlfirned.

    Why , i told her , are you my girlfirned ? Then she was saying the bla bla bla , that doesnt have to do with anything and bla bla bla. Anyways everytime we talked we got into a fight. One night like one week, I put thing straightened out. I told her I cant be friends with ehr anymore and if she wants anything more she can send me any message.
    She told me she doesnt want a relationship with me just for the moment because she is angry with me and bla bla bla. The very next day she tells me wnats me to talk to her , so i bring up the same conversation again. We get into a fight again. Then, she sends me a message : i miss you, can we be friend again ?.

    I tell her all the stuff she needs to know . That we cant be firends , that she should contact me only when she's single. She gets really mad and i decide to write a longer message. I write her this message :
    Look , even I wanna be with you like we used to be but,because im not homosecual and I have a d1ck , that gets erected time after time and because i have testosterone when i talk to a chick comes a moment that i decide whether or not i like her sexualy.

    If i like her secually i ytell er. If she likes me too we get in a relatiobnship and kiss and stuff. If she doesnt like me i dont talk to her too often. Im explaining to you because your're a kid. truth be told , im thinking that you like me too and i dont really get why arent we in a relationship at this moment ? At first I thought our problem was the distance, then i told you i can come back at october wiouthout my parents knowing anythign just for you.
    I told you id buy another phone , another sim card to talk just to you Then I thought you had insecurities and I told you all i could to cover the your insecurities.
    Then I really though you dont like me for real and I gave up. Now you're acting like you like me again. Im starting to think you are just trying to fark around with me and I dont like that very much. You must put an end to this. Even because I have so much to tell you. Then we got into fight again and i told her to stop bothering me.

    Then i get drunk and we start to talk again. I get in a fight with some guy from her profile and i ask him for his phone number. She says to me to call her instead of that dumbfark. I call her. We laugh a lot as far as i remember. She also becomes jealous because i am talking to her by the phone of some friend of mine.
    The next day I dont talk to her. Today she writes me : if i only talk to her when im drunk and i answered yes. We get into a fight again and she gets really mad becayse she calls me a bitch and i tell her : shes the bitch here , not me.

    Then i left things calm down for a little bit, like 1-2 weeks. I started to talk to her again and in the begining she was a bit cold because i had told her not to talk to me as long as she was single. Then I calmed down the situation and I told her we can talk like we used to in the time when we both were in relationships. I told her I had a girlfriend now and we could talk because neither one of us was single.She said she's okay with it but i didnt replay.

    In a week or so , her boyfriend will move to Germany which makes means that he'll be further away than I am. I have to plan my next move and start talking to her. Should I start as soon as her boyfriend moves from her country. Should I be friendly or should I just start it flirty. She was flirty with me even when she was in a relationship.
    Anyone who can help me and can tell me what do i have to do ?

  2. #2
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    Mr8Hyde6 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need help with a girl that i met online then met physically.

    This whole situation sounds way too complicated to put even that amount of effort into it. I am not sure if you mean she is coming or going or what her mind even thinks. I can't even begin to give any advice that would be good or decent because I myself am just confused as to the situation at hand.

    From what I understood, you played some game on her, you think she became interested, but the both of you keep pulling this cat and mouse game with each other.

    Here is what I can say... she is in a relationship with a guy and flirts with you.... From what it seems, you want a relationship with her. You wouldn't of put this much effort and time into talking with her if you didn't find her interesting. You also wrote a post on her, so you do desire her. Anyways, the question now becomes, why would you want to be with a girl that is like that? She has a man, but still flirts with other men. Who says you are the only one? Girls like that tend to continue to exhibit the same behavior in the present as they do in the past.

    I had a good friend who began dating a girl who cheated on her current bf with him. They ended up "together". By together, I mean they never became official and she kept tugging him along. From what it seems in your situation, she has the upper hand.

    You have to evaluate what you really want from this girl because it may or may not be apparent to you. Don't take what I said too harshly. I mean it out of just personal experience and from just understanding women. You should ask if you really want a girl like that?

  3. #3
    cesarei is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Need help with a girl that i met online then met physically.

    1. I do want to be with her for 4 reasons : a. shes a hot 10, b. I have difficulties in liking girls. I cant get out with everyone. c. I have invested time in her and she has invested a lot of time in me. Its difficult to let go someone you've invested time on d. she was the exact type when i met her as she was on facebook and on the phone.
    She is flirty with me because we have been talking together for like 1 year now. She probably got in a relationship just not to get in a relationship with me. You know , she's too hot blooded. She reacts very quickly, she's very unstable,she has sudden change of emotions. I always though I had to follow a tactitc to be more convincing. Sometimes I think I was being too harshy on her , too rude. Probably I should have gone for it a little smoother.
    2. Almost all of the guys she's around with are "nice" guys and they dont even stand a chance. They all the time do nothing but tell her how beautiful she is. I dunno from where this boyfriend come up. Anyway he's going to germany in a week or so.
    I told you. She's probably very hard to get but from what I've understand she's not the type of girl that cheats on her boyfriend. When she was flirting with me she still hadnt made up her mind. She was saying once she wanted and then she didnt or that we shouldnt because im far away.
    She even blocked me one day because according to her her bf doesnt want me talking to her. She of course unblocked me the very next day and I made things a little smoother, so i told her that our relationship now is like a male and a female that both have the respective girlfriend and boyfriend;stuff like this. Now I gotta do my next move. What's so confusing about it. Write what details you wanna know and Ill try to explain as good as I can
    3. Just to make it clear I dont think I was in the friend zone . Our conversations has always been flirty, I passed the comfort step successfully i guess. She'd somehow show me sexy pics of herself always. I used to tell her she had very small boobs and she used to do everything to show me they were big. I dont know where the problem stands but surely its not that im in a friendzone. Almost all of the problem is the distance. i cant entertain her and give her kinds of emotions if i dont meet her. thats why its difficult fo me.

    Some guy adviced me to limit to conversations. If I try it one more time id limit my covnersations and try that thing but the problem is that has not to go for too much long because then id probably get stucked in the friend zone. Someday I have to bring the relationship talk, or ill get stucked in the friend zone.
    Last edited by Bill Preston; 09-19-2011 at 04:58 PM. Reason: 16

  4. #4
    cesarei is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Need help with a girl that i met online then met physically.

    So, anyone has any advice ?


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