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  1. #1
    JohnWoosKid's Avatar
    JohnWoosKid is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Need help picking up a waitress

    Hey folks, I'm new to the forum and this is my first post so bear with me.

    First off, a little about me. I've been out of the game for quite some time due to a serious spinal chord injury. I've been rather fortunate in my recovery but I still have physical difficulties that make me quite self conscious. The biggest difficulty is that I have a lot of stiffness and decreased sensation in my hands which makes it tough for me to do some things like retrieving items from pockets, writing things by hand, and so on. I found some inspiration when I read The Game with the mention of the PUA that was disabled by sniper fire and had no use of one of his arms.

    Now to the issue. I've been stopping in at the Applebees on the way home from the hospital where I do my physical therapy. I always sit at the bar and usually have one or two beers (sometimes food) and then leave. It's always dead at the time I am in there which is usually right after lunchtime. There are only two people that ever bar tend there, one female who is the normal friendly type, and a male who I have gotten kind of chummy with. (I mention this because I think having some sort of rapport with the male bartender could possibly help me use him as a pseudo-wing?)

    So on the first visit that I saw the waitress I couldn't even think of a way to open and left without saying anything to her but we did exchange smiles as she was in and out of the kitchen doing her waitress thing. On the next visit I did manage to open and it went a little like this:

    Me and male bartender were talking football or something, then I notice waitress standing at the other side of the U shaped bar not doing anything. I waved at her to get her attention.
    Me: Hey can I bother you for a sec?
    W: Sure! (smiles)
    Me: What's your name?
    W: I'm Beth!
    Me: Well I'm JWK, and honestly I just noticed you walking around and I wanted to say hi.
    W: Well hi! (smile and waves)

    And then I just couldn't for the life of me think of anything else to say. After a second she walked into the kitchen to grab some food to take out to a table. I sat there for about 10 more mins trying to think of something else to say to her while I BSed with the bar tender but still couldn't think of anything so I finished my beer and got up to leave. As I was walking out I did somewhat loudly say goodbye to her though.

    I figure that at least she knows who I am now so it wasn't all a waste. I was in today and We exchanged a friendly "hi how are you" but still couldn't think of anything else to say to her.

    Any thoughts?

  2. #2
    Pierrot's Avatar
    Pierrot is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need help picking up a waitress

    saying things like plainly "whats your name?" and "just wanted to say hi" is a clear sign that you want to start something with her, and honestly it DOES NOT make you seem more special than anyone else in that setting. think about it.

    at times where there really doesnt seem to be any material to start a conversation:
    1) OBSERVE the setting, know your target: if the bar was full say something like "wow, bet things must be hectic." if the bars having a slow night "willing the bet tonights a little slow huh?" what it will do is obligate her to say something about it. and from this you would have to hear for some hook points AND listen to her tone, she may sound fatigued or energetic, rough or sociable. One word answers are half assed and its a IOD.
    2) carry this convo with at least SOME coherence, if you pull it right shes actually actively trying to juggle you and work, this is a good thing when attention is paramount.
    from there it would depend if you want a ONS or a LTR, but it should be easy to manage this the way you want at this point.

    this may not seem like enough or a sure fire way, but when you are at a position where theres nothing witty or not awkward to talk about freely, you are already at a disadvantage.

  3. #3
    JohnWoosKid's Avatar
    JohnWoosKid is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Need help picking up a waitress

    Actually that's quite helpful. I should just practice using things in the setting as conversation fuel. I never really had much practice with girls I had never spoken to before, it's always ones that I already knew somehow or could easily form something in common so I have to get over that hurdle.

  4. #4
    In The Tropics's Avatar
    In The Tropics is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need help picking up a waitress

    Since it was slow, I would have opened her with something like. " Hey. Did you scare all the people away?" Then like Pierrot stated, she again has to answer your question and you also hit here with a little neg.

    She would know you are kidding, but from that point you need to have some stuff to talk about. The Cube game is a good one. MY personal favorite thing to say to a Bartender or waitress is

    "Hey I went out a couple nights ago and the server was flirting with me. I assumed she was working for a bigger tip. But then I paid with my credit card and she friended me on facebook today. She took my name off of my Credit card. Is that creepy or what? By the way, I better not get a creepy friend request from you on facebook."

    With the above statement you show preselection, and you disqualify the girl by saying you better not get a friend request from her.

    After that you can see where it goes, and maybe work to get some other routines you can use to start practicing with different girls.

    Oh, also. Don't ever tell a girl you are "bothering" her. It subconsciously causes her to think that also and it is a DLV. It shows you are looking for her approval, when what to be doing is DHV and causing her to seek your approval.

    With the opener about scaring people away, you are already showing that she needs to start working for your approval.
    There is no such thing as rejection, only feedback.

    Be the flame, not the moth.

  5. #5
    Pierrot's Avatar
    Pierrot is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need help picking up a waitress

    good stuff


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