Hey guys I hope you can shine some light on this weird dynamic! Just to set the tone I am 26yo and apparently a good looking stand up guy etc. I have been in a dead end relationship for 4 years (only dead end for the last year as ive been living abroad and its weakened our relationship).
Anyway I started working in a department store and get on great with everyone and cant help but flirting with all the girls so much so that I got taken into my probationary review and was informed that I was doing well but area for improvement was to stop chatting up girls lol! What a thing to be told!
Anyway one HB8 asked me to a house party. I show up and as the night progresses I turned the conversation sexual and challenged them all to tell me how far they've gone. I then gradually dragged everyone to the bedroom and we passed out on a massive bed with this girl taking my hands to play with her under the covers. Anyway the next day she was full of buyers remorse and felt embarrassed.
I text her a day later to see how shes doing. She replies friendly enough so then I'm thinking considering we went this far 2 days earlier I could take the flirting up a notch and replied with 'Id love to meet up and continue where we left off .' She then replies but you can tell she now feels bad and doesnt want to be seen as a slut so I tone it down.
I see her at work and tell her she needs to come out with me and she refuses it constantly whilst laughing and smiling so i did it in front of customers. They loved it lol.
'So you coming out tonight? NO. Oh right so 7pm? No lol. 8pm? No lolllll. Well you do realise you will have lots of happiness if you do. No I cant ive got to blah blah. Interesting point but 7.30pm sounds good. Ahhhhhh you're so annoying blah blah but alright!!!' lol
In the end she had to agree and we met up. I made more in depth convo with her later but she was so hesitant when I made any kind of move like sharing some dessert with her. Seeing this as a big challenge I persist anyway. After hanging out a few times and rejecting my advances she starts wanting to see me. One day I told her I like reading so she brought me her favourite book to read. I read it and then secretly annotated it. When she got it back she loved it ALongside this I work closely with another HB8 party girl and both of them got jealous as you could tell when they insult each other to me. 'Shes such a slut' lol etc. Anyway always good for some DHV. I also then here from a friend that she likes me. Good good!
However, the girl says we can only be friends as she has a BF she lives with (a complicated situation as she doesnt want to be with him but logistically she cant afford to move. I should also note she was just dumped from a 1 year secret relationship with one of her best friends who also works with us in the store!).
We hang out and after a couple of weeks shes then wanting to cook for me and sleep under the stars etc and tells me we are so much more than best friends arnt we? Etc. She texts me saying how I amaze her and that shes never met anyone like me, we are soul mates etc. She then says that if she liked me she would never tell me lol. I took that as a strong IOI.
I have to admit that by this time 4 weeks had past and after being physically rejected so many times initially I stopped making physical advances on her as I thought she really jsut responds to AFC behaviour! Then when It got to the point she was telling me soul mates etc my resolve by that point had finally been worn down and we kept hanging out as friends. Perhaps I should have persisted like at the beginning and seen that as the time to escalate? I just was totally thrown by the fact she says we can only be friends and then tells me we are soul mates. I mean what is this madness lol?!
I must point out she is the complete opposite of a party chick. She's 19yo and has only had one 4 year relationship she's still half in and then hooked up with her best friend of 2 years after he chased her for over a year telling him they can only be friends etc. For them to hook up he showed up at her house crying his eyes out declaring his love for her!!! Penis suicide you would think. Not in this case!
Anyway after being worn down by this broad I just called her on her talk and she said that when she thinks of being with me it scares her! The guy who just broke it off with her was in the same boat as me as he had a semi relationship going on abroad too and ended it with this HB8 to go back abroad. I can see how she wouldnt want the same thing again. I can honestly say I did my best with this girl but she wore me down and in the end I took a job abroad myself recently and now rarely talk with her.
It was a great experience anyway but Id love to get your opinions on this. Id think she genuinly was such a 'nice' girl that someone like me scared her and she was one of these only hook up unless you are a friend for years lol. She is scared to death of being hurt. Either that or she had me totally fooled and is just loves to get some attention without having to commit her feelings to anything. She has never kissed a guy that she didnt love! She told me this and I believe it as that first night when my hands were all over her I kissed her body but when I went to her mouth she would always move away. As David D says 'sometimes girls are just freaks' lol. What dyou think fellas?