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Thread: In danger of LJBF -How to avert disaster?

  1. #11
    the_oc is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: In danger of LJBF -How to avert disaster?

    I haven't heard from her since Friday, when she sent those big serious texts I quoted in my original post. Up until recently she was texting me daily.

    I'll be seeing her a week from today when I go back to college and I'm not planning to initiate any contact until then. I think I need to bamboozle her and I'm thinking I can do that by treating her like one of the guys, as if nothing has ever happened between us. If she asks me out I'm going to turn her down and only offer a vague excuse, like 'I'm busy'.

    I also have an idea for a boyfriend destroyer I can casually work into regular conversation, based on a strong hunch I have about her bf. I figure I can get her to come running if I can give her the impression that I'm moving on and she's stuck with him.

  2. #12
    the_oc is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: In danger of LJBF -How to avert disaster?

    Quote Originally Posted by BearScoob View Post
    My two cents on this is this might be her MO. You said she has never cheated on him....of course she is going to say that. She slept with you VERY quickly ( not that you dont have game but a girl who has never cheated doesnt jump on a guy that quick, that often, and she put up almost zero fight when she put up resistance a few montsh later).

    In my eyes, shes playing you. This is that " i am so innocent" girl who plays that card to get what she wants ( a bf and a fark buddy). Go for it if you want, just dont be suprised when she cheats on you.

    If you really want to her to be your gf, you need to do some pushing yourself. Freeze her out when she starts complaining about her relationship, when she comes back to you explain that you want more than whats going on.
    I have considered that possibility. I've been around the block enough times not to completely buy into the little miss innocent routine. I like her as a person and she's fun to hang out with, so I just want to get to know her a bit better really. Mustn't forget about other girls though, of course.

  3. #13
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    Swagman is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: In danger of LJBF -How to avert disaster?

    I have one question: How was she the first night you two did it? How did you treat her after that? Because what I'm seeing may be the problem here is that she was having buyer's remorse, and you incorrectly responded to it. You also should not have let these moments of awkward silence carry on, because that only added onto the damage that was already happening.

    Overall, it sounds like she simply left you because she couldn't handle the strain anymore. She had to make a choice, and even though you were flirty and fun, you did nothing to relieve the Tension that was between the two of you. All you did was just make it worse.

    If I was you, and I wanted this girl, I would not go back to the way things were before. In fact, I would aim to build up comfort where comfort was missing before. By the sounds of it, however, this is beyond fixing at the moment. It's best if you just moved on. Latter on in your life, you may find an opportunity with her again.
    "There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." - Malcolm X

  4. #14
    FunDanceMan is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: In danger of LJBF -How to avert disaster?

    Such different advice. So should he continue Freezing Her Out? Or build more comfort?

    Cant more comfort in this situation just end up as LJBF?

  5. #15
    the_oc is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: In danger of LJBF -How to avert disaster?

    Quote Originally Posted by FunDanceMan View Post
    Such different advice. So should he continue Freezing Her Out? Or build more comfort?

    Cant more comfort in this situation just end up as LJBF?
    Good question.. Well, she broke her silence a few hours ago and texted me the following:

    "Hey, I was just thinking, I'm gonna have a long think about what's happening.. Does that sound okay? But we can't be awkward no matter what the outcome.."

    I've ignored her and just gone to bed. Need to think about what to come back with tomorrow. That last line about not being awkward kind of gave me a feeling of impending doom, but then again she's repeating this pattern of being hesitant.. I mean, why is she asking me if it's OK for her to think? Is this her way of asking me to take control?

    I get the feeling my reaction to this could determine whether she tries to put me in the friend zone or not.


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