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  1. #1
    raine is offline PUA in Training
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    Default keeps saying the word "friends"...frie ndzo ned?

    known this girl for a couple months, shes 18 never had a boyfriend, shy type. doesn't think shes good enough for anyone etc etc...that kind of girl ( but shes gorgeous)

    now, in these couple of months she's been trying to prove herself ( or it seems like ) to me...

    always saying things like " i'm not like other girls you know!" " am i the girl you're closest too?"

    i got pissed at her for something she did so i simply went NC for a week, after a week she sent me 2 essay long text messages apologizing, asking me what she did wrong.

    I told her, and she said " i'm going to do everything you just said and fix it i don't want to prove myself unworthy to you"

    however heres the catch, she always brings up the word friends..
    "we're so alike its like we were meant to be friends"
    (when i was mad at her) " so are we friends again right ??"

    not sure whether to take this as i'm friendzoned and shes just really friendly or if she likes me due to the always attempting to prove her worth to me...any insight would be appreciated

  2. #2
    Wolf24's Avatar
    Wolf24 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: keeps saying the word "friends"...frie ndzo ned?

    I think she might be into you.

    She tries to qualify herself to you by differentiating herself from the other girls, saying things like: "I'm different blabla"

    In essence, when a girl qualifies herself to you, she tries to somewhat prove that she can be your girl.

    But then she doesn't want to be seen as an "easy girl" so she disqualifies herself by saying things like "friends".

    If I were you, I'd playfully "dodge" the friends talk. And when she qualifies herself to you, the usual thing we do is to show our interest without getting too serious or needy.

    Hope this gives you an idea.
    It's not about who I was or who I'm going to become.

    It's about who I am. Do it right here, right now.

  3. #3
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    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: keeps saying the word "friends"...frie ndzo ned?

    She's into you man. The friend thing is just to protect herself. She's never had a bf correct? I'm also going to assume that she is also a virgin. Both of those things means that you have a lot of work ahead of you, but you are off to a really good start by getting her to qualify. Every time she mentions friends just let her say it. You know she is interested so don't make it a big deal. But also don't add to it by calling her a friend back. Just brush it off and change the subject whenever she says it and DON'T GET MAD. You're focus has to be on physical escalation and not with your words. Hide her from her inhibitions by never talking about what's going on between the two of you.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  4. #4
    Mikalichov is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: keeps saying the word "friends"...frie ndzo ned?

    "Haha, no, I haven't friendzoned you yet, don't worry"
    Seduction is a martial art. Reading books and talking to experts is important, and helpful. But you won't progress unless you go out there and fight.

  5. #5
    EightBall is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: keeps saying the word "friends"...frie ndzo ned?

    Yeah you're definitely off to a great start. She's into you without a doubt and probably just afraid to tell you. Seeing as she's not experienced with guys, it makes sense that she's using the "friends" route.

    I dealt with a very similar situation last year with an 18 year old virgin. She was doing the same routine and one night after hanging out I just kissed her. Might seem a little drastic but I got tired of waiting and it was the perfect timing. We ended up dating for about 6 months after this.

    Just stay patient and like the other guys said, don't acknowledge the "friends" comments. Just ignore them and it all should work out.

    -EightBall

  6. #6
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: keeps saying the word "friends"...frie ndzo ned?

    If she is been too friendly then she may have zoned you.it depends on what you got mad about.does she flirt or challenge you.she may be trying to get your attention. but the word unworthy got me thinking.either way you need to move past this friendship frame by getting physical.

  7. #7
    raine is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: keeps saying the word "friends"...frie ndzo ned?

    so how do i move things to the next step with such a shy girl? she doesn't seem TOTALLY opposed to touching, she had her arms around me a couple times but she still seems kinda defensive...on other days...kind of a hit or miss..

  8. #8
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: keeps saying the word "friends"...frie ndzo ned?

    she may be playing it safe cause you are playing it 'safe'..invite her out and talk.I'll assume you know how to run game.once she seems engaged look for a place you both can sit if you are standing hold her hand and lead her there sit not too far apart from each other.ask her to come closer.once she does that touch the tips of her hair if she complies lean in...be the first to pull away,get up and walk on with her.from there it begins.calibrate. Peace

  9. #9
    raine is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: keeps saying the word "friends"...frie ndzo ned?

    i'm not sure this method will work....this girl is one of the girls that is truly beautiful looking but has no self esteem for whatever past history reasons ( i'm not exactly sure why shes this way) so she has her guard up at all times...usually a little Kino won't bother her but i'm not sure about the suggestion above.

  10. #10
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: keeps saying the word "friends"...frie ndzo ned?

    opposed to touching, she had her arms around me a couple times but she still seems kinda defensive...on other days...kind of a hit or miss..
    She keeps giving the signals but you missed it.as long as she is a woman she may not be opposed to escalation.her putting arms around you was the go ahead to move things forward.when you don't and you try another time it may be seen as rejection and pressure.

    Resist the urge to put them in stereotypes and go ahead and escalate.she likes you on some level.you may kiss her at least.knoe you wont stay in friend zone for long.


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