Top 10 Stats
Latest Posts Loading... Loading...
Loading...
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Results 1 to 5 of 5
  1. #1
    Adam Taylor's Avatar
    Adam Taylor is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 607, Level: 12
    Level completed: 14%, Points required for next Level: 43
    Overall activity: 14.0%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered500 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Location
    Budapest, Hungary
    Posts
    105
    Points
    607
    Level
    12
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    31

    Default Building towards LTR

    I need your help guys at this one.
    I talked about this girl some on different threads. Just to catch up: she was extremely tricky, but I gamed, and f-closed her. Since then, we met like once a week, had great sex. We actually get on very well - last time was the first occasion we didn't hahev sex, we went to see a movie instead. Partly because she had her period, and partly because time and place issues. So I can imagine her as my future GF.

    Last time we talked about "celebrating Christmas" because I had to travel to my hometown, and I won't be back for 2 weeks. She worried about it - what means celebrate Christmas, is it that serious etc. Soo it lead to the feared "the TALK". Unfortunately, we had it on phone...

    The TALK: she mentioned before that she ended a 6 year relationship on summer and that she has commitment issues. So she was pretty much on the "let's just hang out and have sex together, but see others too" side. As for me: yeah, it's been great, but I can imagine her in a LTR, too. So, I told her that I'm in game only if we leave every option open: we'll see what's happening between us, maybe we will get together closer, maybe not. I also told her that from this point, it's kinda dumb to state anything carved in stone: let's see whats happening. But if any of us felt something differently, if any of us felt if it doesn't work out or even the opposite, she/he mentioned it to the other. She agreed on it, but I felt it a bit forced - even though I tried not to force anything at all! I feel like getting to closer to you even now, but from this point, I can accept if we stop seeing each other too. So, I don't know what to do. Eventually we agreed on the classic "we'll see" - but as I fell, she doesn't want anything more serious.

    I decided to give it a try - I want to try to build a LTR, while if any other girl come to my life, welcome. So what you guys think I should do? I'm thinking of making just as many sexless programmes as much we actually have sex. Do you know any other tactic that help me get her closer to me?

    Every notice and thought is welcomed - I'm quite bad at relationships, this is the point when the AFC in me gains ground.

  2. #2
    TheDuke's Avatar
    TheDuke is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 18,053, Level: 92
    Level completed: 89%, Points required for next Level: 47
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    Social7 days registered10000 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    813
    Points
    18,053
    Level
    92
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    772

    Default Re: Building towards LTR

    Sounds like she cares less than you do in the relationship. Which means you're going to be on the losing end of this unless you get control of the situation. The best thing for you to do at this point is just move on and focus on yourself. You can keep seeing her if you're able to keep yourself together, but otherwise, I think you should just move on.

    Honestly, you don't want to start a LTR from a position of you caring more than she does. And "not having sex" with her is not going to help you get closer to her.
    "It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything."

  3. #3
    Adam Taylor's Avatar
    Adam Taylor is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 607, Level: 12
    Level completed: 14%, Points required for next Level: 43
    Overall activity: 14.0%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered500 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Location
    Budapest, Hungary
    Posts
    105
    Points
    607
    Level
    12
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    31

    Default Re: Building towards LTR

    It's hard to take notice of it, but you're right. Where we're now, I'M more attached to her then she is to me - I should decide whether I should stop devoting time, energy etc. or I should take control of it and get her closer to me.

    I feel like there is a slight chance to eventually start a LTR with her somewhere in the future: if we keep seeing each other, and doing memorable stuffs that are getting us closer to each other - or something like that. But I'll keep on sarging and my eyes open to see other girls, too.

  4. #4
    TheDuke's Avatar
    TheDuke is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 18,053, Level: 92
    Level completed: 89%, Points required for next Level: 47
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    Social7 days registered10000 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    813
    Points
    18,053
    Level
    92
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    772

    Default Re: Building towards LTR

    It's not about seeing other girls as much as it's about keeping an abundance mentality. In all honesty, oneitis is more about over-committing to a girl. If you're committed to her more than she is committed to you, then you've fallen into a oneitis mentality. You need to snap out of that and stop putting her on a pedestal. I guarantee that if you don't, you'll end up with your heart broken and her walking away anyways.
    "It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything."

  5. #5
    twentynine's Avatar
    twentynine is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 2,991, Level: 35
    Level completed: 61%, Points required for next Level: 59
    Overall activity: 10.0%
    Achievements:
    Social1000 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    287
    Points
    2,991
    Level
    35
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    141

    Default Re: Building towards LTR

    Listen to TheDuke. He's right and I speak from experience.. It's not fun.


Similar Threads

  1. I need help building attraction
    By STIZO in forum Help Getting A Girlfriend
    Replies: 2
    Last Thread: 12-03-2012, 05:17 AM
  2. Can anyone help me with my frame building
    By SexualSorcerer333 in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 6
    Last Thread: 11-24-2012, 05:18 PM
  3. Building attraction at its best!
    By Erixzon in forum General Questions
    Replies: 3
    Last Thread: 08-20-2012, 07:30 PM
  4. Here's one for overall rapport building
    By eodice717 in forum Self Improvement And Health
    Replies: 0
    Last Thread: 10-29-2010, 01:13 PM
  5. Comfort Building?
    By BMQ in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 1
    Last Thread: 07-24-2010, 06:07 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
DMCA.com