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  • 1 Post By Djordje2013
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Thread: feelings for my good friend

  1. #1
    Djordje2013 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default feelings for my good friend

    Hi guys

    So I have started to have feelings for one of my best friends, and this is the bad part, just 2 months ago, she winged my to date her BEST friend and I her wing for some dude.
    So as I gave up on her best friend, who actually is my classmate......so is my crush. So one night we decided to take a walk, we were out clubbing, and we sat down at a bench. now this is what happened:
    We talked about me being over her best friend, and that I've been that 3 weeks, out of no where we talked about how WE would do in a relationship. Then I sort of confessed my crush on her. We ended up kissing, and I followed her home, no balls deep action though, we kissed each other goodbye, talked about actually starting something, but taking it slow.
    The following monday, we talked about the weekend, but she said that it meant nothing, and that she wasn't the right fit for me, since she knows my type(bad excuse) and that she had no feeling for me.
    After that we didn't speak for a week. But then she invited me out to a café with her sister, but nothing happened.
    Here is where Im not sure. there has been days where we just seem to hit it of chemestry wise, and the next, she doesn't say a word. There has been lots of times where she would sit right next to me, even with her best friend sitting somewhere else, and not talk to me......just smile when we glance at each other.....what do I do. I really wanna move on, but its tough when she fits in so many ways, to MY perfect girl. And some of herg friends say that she is giving a lot of ioi's but is still denying that she likes me. How should I handle the situation, I'm not quiting on this one!

  2. #2
    Will E. is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: feelings for my good friend

    Hey djordje, good work on making the move. It seems apparent that she is attracted to you based on the fact that you both kissed and her friends say she is giving you IOIs but is reluctant to have more of relationship for some reason. It could be that she doesn't want to chance ruining a good friendship with her best friend. I would probably just break more rapport to spark more attraction and escalate when you are isolated, if she is unreceptive, pull back for a bit and build comfort. Rinse and repeat. You could also build a jealousy plot line while also avoiding oneitis.

  3. #3
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    cdharders is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: feelings for my good friend

    Don't come to her beck and call. Game more girls. Don't definte a relationship that hasn't even started. When she says it won't work between you, agree. It would also be valuable for you to do the same. If she's with her sister, understand that's a very bad likelihood of things going further. Appreciate where you're at and realize that escalating to full close the first time is the best strategy for future instances. Good luck!
    The Official Tinder Playbook--> http://conquerdatingapps.co m <--Stop swiping, start hooking up

  4. #4
    Mikalichov is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: feelings for my good friend

    ^ What he just said

    Also, it seems you are ruining the mystery every time. If you start talking about "how you would do in a relationship", and agrees on "starting something but going slow", what mystery is there left?

    Don't try to make thigns clear, girls hate it when it's clear, especially at the beginning, it's boring. It's like a movie that started with "you will think during most of the movie that the murderer is the victim's husband, but it's actually her sister. The hero will be in trouble, but he will survive anyway without getting hurt, no issue there"

    Don't try to know if she likes you. Don't tell her you like her. Actually, tell her she's your best friend while hugging her, and see how she reacts
    Seduction is a martial art. Reading books and talking to experts is important, and helpful. But you won't progress unless you go out there and fight.

  5. #5
    Djordje2013 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: feelings for my good friend

    Thanks guys, that's really good advice! And I have taken it, I went out, gamed more girls, closed with a few though.
    So after I started, doing that, she noticed. Last time we went out, she wanted to get real close, tugged her arm around mine, like a ''couple'' would do, and then she said ''We are not gonna have that serious talk yet''. I was kind of baffled by it, but kept my cool and replied''what talk''.
    Her: you know, the talk.
    Me: Don't worry, there's not going to be a ''serious talk'', we're good friends.
    Plus now, shE invited me to her new years party, and apperantly, we are only gonna be she and I, plus 3 other girls
    What's your take on that?

  6. #6
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: feelings for my good friend

    Thanks guys, that's really good advice! And I have taken it, I went out, gamed more girls, closed with a few though.
    So after I started, doing that, she noticed. Last time we went out, she wanted to get real close, tugged her arm around mine, like a ''couple'' would do, and then she said ''We are not gonna have that serious talk yet''. I was kind of baffled by it, but kept my cool and replied''what talk''.
    Her: you know, the talk.
    Me: Don't worry, there's not going to be a ''serious talk'', we're good friends.
    Plus now, shE invited me to her new years party, and apperantly, we are only gonna be she and I, plus 3 other girls
    What's your take on that?

    kiss her and close!!!

  7. #7
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    Default Re: feelings for my good friend

    I have this theory that women always know what they really want deep down. The rest of the BS is just them trying to justify it with girl "logic". As long as you know she wants you deep down you can wait out the noise, and generally shrug off whatever BS she throws at you. Just sit back and seduce her with non-verbals.

    Ex. When she keeps talking talking about just being friends you can just roll with it because you know that she wants you. You can play it with a knowing-smirk on your face like James Bond while you watch it unfold. The power of knowing is strong.

    You have a good shot on New Year's. It's an easy justification for her kissing you in her mind. Have fun with it!

    I had a similar situation years ago. This girl always wanted to hang out with me "as friends"... we would hook up and everything and she swore up and down that we were just friends. I knew she wanted me so I just waited until she settled the war with herself and decided we could date.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: feelings for my good friend

    Pay a lot of attention to her friends on New Years, more to them than to her. Every interaction with your target that night should be to build on something; attraction, comfort and rapport. If you get along great with her friends and make them laugh it will help you hugely. Tell a story if you have a good one. Tease her a little as well but just jokingly.

    Isolate, escalate, kiss her and close this thing. You're in a good spot right now, don't deviate.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: feelings for my good friend

    Quote Originally Posted by twentynine View Post
    Pay a lot of attention to her friends on New Years, more to them than to her. Every interaction with your target that night should be to build on something; attraction, comfort and rapport. If you get along great with her friends and make them laugh it will help you hugely. Tell a story if you have a good one. Tease her a little as well but just jokingly.

    Isolate, escalate, kiss her and close this thing. You're in a good spot right now, don't deviate.
    Twentynine is on the right track. Another good reason to focus on the friends is because they can influence her. You should work on entertaining the friends, being a good host, and making sure that they have a great time. If you win the friends, then you win the girl.
    "There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." - Malcolm X


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