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  • 1 Post By Kyl3
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Thread: Advice on a Shy girl needed.

  1. #1
    Grey2fox is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Advice on a Shy girl needed.

    A short background on myself first. 25yo, decided to get into PUA about 4 months ago to change my AFC behind. Got good results. My interaction with women are much better and I'm working every fibre of my body to get better.

    Now to my main issue. A new co-worker just joined our retail store. She's Latvian, about 5'2" and gorgeous to boot. She's really shy. I've read a lot of things on gaming shy girls and most of them recommend some serious patience involving gaming her for anywhere from 3-6 months. Some of the things I read suggest that I open up to her and reveal myself so she gets to know me and be more comfortable around me.

    Although we've been seeing each other at work for over 2-3 months now. I mostly started talking to her about 3 weeks ago. First week, she revealed to me that she was shy. After a week of talking to her about my own shyness and other stories, she became more comfortable and revealed her drunken mishaps like falling into a ditch or falling out of a moving car. I thought this was some sort of ioi considering she doesn't speak to most (if not all) of the people at work and as a shy person, she revealed some of her embarrassing moments.

    I have rarely seen her lately as I'm doing a lot of night shifts considering it's Christmas season now. Even though we've only been talking for about 3 weeks, I feel as if she's comfortable around me and I think she likes me. The next time I see her, I want to tell her that I like her and find her interesting and if she wants me to take it further with a date.

    Is this a good idea? Or am I simply turning into my 'natural' AFC self? I know it's a big mistake to get into a relationship so soon considering there's a wealth of things in the PUA community I have yet to learn or discover.

  2. #2
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    Kyl3 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Advice on a Shy girl needed.

    Umm don't tell her you like her that's a bad idea. Once you Take Away ALL of the challenge the attraction dies out very fast, unless she's already very fond of you.
    (on a separate point, telling a girl that you find her attractive in a fun flirty detached way is different, best done face to face)

    I also struggle with shy girls, mostly because once you get them to open up to you they can turn into completely different girls. Just because she's a really quiet, shy, sweet, innocent little girl when she's acting all shy doesn't mean she's not a complete nympho who's into hard drugs and Heavy metal and partying. (I have actually gamed a girl who was like that lol) So you have to calibrate accordingly.

    Since you're kind of a noob to this, (i don't mean that in a mean way) this is what i would do if i was you.
    1.) She's shy. So off that assumption, to build rapport try to tell some embarrassing funny stories. Try and get her to laugh without being her dancing monkey. Then after get her to tell a funny story, if she refuses, just be playful with her. She should open up to you if done right kinda fast and you're building higher value by saying cool Sh1t. If done right you should avoid the friendzone too even though you're a noobie.
    2.) Once you've built a little rapport, tease her, give her a hard time, and Kino kino kino. touch her. break rapport. Tell her that you cant decide whether shes one of the coolest girls you've ever met, or the weirdest. Idk how to put this into words but just be a fun, confident, attractive dude.
    3.) Pull the trigger. Tell her that you need her help with something and ask her to join you. Tell her about something fun going on that you'd like her to join you for. Invite her to do something cool that YOU were already going to do. Tell her she's a cool chick and that you wanna hangout sometime. Its pretty basic and simple and their is a few ways to do it. Don't be a fag and ask her out on a date or to come to the movies with you or something. Make it seem like a casual hangout (even though you know better haha).
    when she says yes, have a blast doing whatever, kiss her, bring her back to your place because you forgot something or you want her to check something cool out at your place and close her.

    I''m on my labtop so i don't feel like typing any more man but that should be a good start.

  3. #3
    Grey2fox is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Advice on a Shy girl needed.

    Appreciate the advice and thanks a bunch. I have made a few mistakes to which I've decided I need to pull away from her. Why is it the girls you like always get the better of you and you aren't sure how to act. Especially in my case. I don't have that much experience.

    In between the time I posted that and the time of your reply, I did take a few steps and in hindsight, I came in too strong and turned needy. Not only that but I initiated the conversations on Whatsapp all the time and supplicated for her emotions.

    For the past week this turned into a oneitis and it was making me stressful so I decided to pull out and game other chicks for my own well being. If it was me, 6 months ago then I would have stayed for the long run and ignore all the choices around me. I went back to being the flirty self at work and I have met someone else. Took me a day or so but I've already forgotten about her. Thanks again.

  4. #4
    Voodo69 is offline Banned
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    Default Re: Advice on a Shy girl needed.

    It does not take that long.. that's called slow game.. just make her feel comfortable being around you make her laugh make her blush she'll get attracted to you fast but then just say something like we you seem a real cool person we should hangout what you like to do for fun and so on..

  5. #5
    Grey2fox is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Advice on a Shy girl needed.

    Tried to gouge some info on her favourite things. Didn't work, so then I went for the direct approach and that didn't go so well either. She mostly goes with "I don't know". Built good rapport and comfort with her. Got her texting and she opened up. I didn't like the fact that I had to initiate contact every time. In our text convos I contribute to most of it.

    I stopped and froze her out because it felt like I was regressing back to being an AFC again. Not only that but I noticed that I was starting to have a bad case of oneitis. I was always waiting for that text from her so I stopped contact and resumed gaming other girls. I met someone else who I made more progress with in 1 day then I did with her in 1 month.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Advice on a Shy girl needed.

    Be careful if it's a serious job. Easy to get weird harassment charges from pushing too hard if she's not interested back.

    When I got into game, I used to think there were all these different types of girls (shy girls, outgoing girls, tomboys, gold diggers, etc), and I learned that while certain girls had altered reactions to what I was saying, the process is exactly the same.

    No, don't wait 3-6 months gaming her. Even if you want her to be your girlfriend rather than a FWB, you need to move a lot quicker than that.

    She is not shy to everyone. That means she is not shy to people she is comfortable with. Build attraction more subtly than crassly and focus more on commonalities. She should ALWAYS qualify more to you than you to her.

    I would not go direct in a work situation.
    The Official Tinder Playbook--> http://conquerdatingapps.co m <--Stop swiping, start hooking up


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