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  1. #11
    Latin Stallion's Avatar
    Latin Stallion is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Dating girl for a month (non exclusive). Help!

    No no. She didn't leave my bday and post pictures of him and her that night. I would've been super pissed. She left early but didn't post anything of him and her. No, I'm not new to PUA. I was really heavy into it when I was 23 and did it for a while then eventually got out of it. I have read the book "the game" and "mystery methods" I have done the Kino etc and learned about stacking and pivots etc. I am just now gettinf back into it. 27 now.

    Yeah I think another reason she is leaning toward him is because his personality. Her ex bfs are urban (ghetto-ish) and he is similar to them. Also I believe I am not coming off alpha enough. I need to be more assertive. I agree I need to pick up the books again and get back into it hardcore. Went out last night wit a couple chicks. So trying to get my mind off of her and focus on reinventing myself as more alpha when or if she comes out with me again. I'm not going to ghoul over her and be sad though. What do you mean by passive value???

  2. #12
    I.M.Mortal's Avatar
    I.M.Mortal is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dating girl for a month (non exclusive). Help!

    That's good you not new. But the art has evolved much since "Mystery Method" and there is a movement towards natural game.

    When you are running game that is you working your active value.

    Passive value is basically a reflection of your Social Status. Women are attracted to the perception of status. If Pitbull the rapper were to walk into a club and was announced, he could pretty much not even run an active game and his status alone can get him just about any girl. He can just sit there and hardly say a word and girls will be clamoring all over him.

    If you are the promoter of the club or even a host of a party, you just created passive status for yourself.

    Something as simple as being seen with a hot girl also boosts your passive value because it triggers a woman's pre-selection. Beautiful women attract other beautiful women. When women see you with a beautiful woman, she automatically will wonder what you are about. Her mind doesn't think "If [X] and [Y], then [XY]" Her mind just comes to the conclusion.

    Okay, so it sounds like the other guy is a "type" that she is naturally attracted to. If they are truly compatible in terms of same interests/value/outlook in life, there will be a natural attraction between them. Not much you can do about that, except let her be and continue searching for the one girl who is compatible with you.

  3. #13
    Latin Stallion's Avatar
    Latin Stallion is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Dating girl for a month (non exclusive). Help!

    Ok. Very clear description. I understand now about passive value. If you have any books or videos you recommend for me I will appreciate it. I am on vacation for another week so I have spare time to study.

    Yeah, I think my problem with her started when I let her pick all of our dates. She dictated every single date and where we would go and I let her. My error. I should be more assertive and aggressive.

  4. #14
    I.M.Mortal's Avatar
    I.M.Mortal is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dating girl for a month (non exclusive). Help!

    I have a few things I can recommend.

    Jason Capital has an ebook called "Make Women Want You" It's very simple and efficient. He promotes natural game and less on the overly technical stuff and/or routines. This guy is actually a pretty badass coach.

    Mark Manson has a book called "Models: Attract Women Thru Honesty" that focuses on developing true confidence the foundation of innergame and not based on tricks, games, or techniques. He is not a proponent of PUA methods because much of it is "performing" and not being real/genuine, which u cannot keep up forever. I think every so-called PUA needs to read this book or watch his online seminars. It changed the way I look at PUA.

    If you can master and synergize what these two guys preach...unstoppable . I have others but for your purposes start with these two.

    Yeah, I think my problem with her started when I let her pick all of our dates. She dictated every single date and where we would go and I let her. My error. I should be more assertive and aggressive.
    Oh yea for sure that is bad, especially if you paid! That's her way of leading you around for a free ride and meal ticket. And by you agreeing to it, it makes you beta/chump/AFC/chaser because you gave up your value. Also, if you are passive like "So where do you want to go" BAD. Even asking her "Do you want to go to XXX?" that's no good. Beta.

    With any woman, know where you want to go and when and tell her this is what you are planning. She either accepts or she doesn't. If she wants to go to a different place, tell her next time, but for now this is what you have planned and you believe she will enjoy it. Keep your frame. Stay on target.

    The key word is dominant (which is not authoritative or control freakish). According to Christian Hudson, it's one of the 10 traits of the ideal man women obsess over.

    Dominant Man character traits
    - Having expectations for how things should be
    - Assertively pursuing what you want.
    - Willing to risk rejection to get what you want and what you think is right.
    - Doesn’t care what other people think.


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