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  1. #1
    Latin Stallion's Avatar
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    Default Dating girl for a month (non exclusive). Help!

    So, I have been talking to this girl I met for about a month. We had a first date where we did dinner and a bar for drinks. Went decent. Ran routine on her, did the cube, did the 5 question game. I said if I win you have to give me a kiss. She said "on the cheek". So, I won. She made up an excuse why she didn't have to. I knew she didn't want to so I didn't stress it. So, that next week, we text on and off. She invited me to see her at her job at night, introduced me to cowokers of hers blah blah blah. This went on for a full week or so.

    We had our second date on a Saturday. She wanted dinner and a movie. We had dinner and drinks; talked, it was good. Went to the theater but power was off so, she said "We can do the movie tomorrow". So, I said of course. So, we did.

    Well, we had another date. She invited to dinner and introduced me to her daughter. Went well, I paid. I came up with the idea for ice cream, blah blah blah. So, that following week (week 3) we go out clubbing and bar hoping. She really starts to open up and talk. (We STILL hadn't kissed yet). Well, she finally gives me Kino and tells me about her ex and how she's still getting over him and how hard it is. She cuddles with my arm that night. We leave and have good convo in car until interrupted by a homeless dude who ruined the moment. So, cut it short.

    Two days later we are to have dinner, she introduces me to her best friend and we eat. After that we split off for an couple hours and agree to meet up again that night. She introduces me to her brother, his girlfriend, and other friends. We talk, cuddle, take pics, I kiss her cheek a few times, she told me she didn't want to kiss on the lips because it was two soon. She has only been broken up for 2 months with ex. Well, her bro and his girl and everyone likes me. She ended up meeting some new guy and every since then she seems to split time with me and him . I'm thinking she likes him more.

    I got an Instagram account and we follow each other. I see she went out with him last Thursday and they have a picture hugged up. She got drunk. Has a pic of him kissing her on the cheek and hand on her thigh. Oh, and he took her home and "dropped her off" at 5am. I didn't say a word about it because I don't want to come off jealous this early and we aren't official. So, the next day (Friday) she went out with friends again. We had plans for Saturday. I was celebrating my bday. She came out to the dinner but she seemed in a bad mood and refused to go to bars or clubs with me and my friends. After dinner, she went back home. I was pissed but didn't say anything. So, now I see she NEVER likes any of my pics on Instagram and she has literally liked EVERY pic on his page except one. WHAT SHOULD I DO?!!! I REALLY like this girl.

  2. #2
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    cdharders is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dating girl for a month (non exclusive). Help!

    Game a new girl. You're showing this one too much interest. Also, she sees you too much right now, so you need to distance yourself. That's why the new guy got her. He was outside the social circle. Stop looking at social media for anything more than what it is. Analyzing number of likes is way over the top. Odds are, she felt you being frustrated at the dinner too.
    The Official Tinder Playbook--> http://conquerdatingapps.co m <--Stop swiping, start hooking up

  3. #3
    Fire Eater is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dating girl for a month (non exclusive). Help!

    I think she put you in the friend zone, and my advice would be to make her chase after you. If she notices your lack of attention and missing presence then there is interest.

    Other than that, I advise not to put all your eggs in one basket and move on.

  4. #4
    I.M.Mortal's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dating girl for a month (non exclusive). Help!

    This situation sucks. Been there myself.

    The solution is simple. You mirror her.

    So she is seeing another guy. You go out with another girl (or two). You guys are sharing instagrams perfect! So let her see you having a fun lucrative life with other (hotter) women and that will trigger off something in her. You need to create passive value for yourself.

    As the others are saying, you are getting too invested in this girl and it is messing up your inner game. The solution would be to create an abundance mentality for yourself and see other women. This is tough but you gotta do it, not for her, but yourself. Overtime, you will become indifferent - the absence of need.

    Don't spend so much time looking back on a closing door and miss the ones that are opening in front of you. Somewhere you may meet a woman who is higher quality, got no baggage, and way more compatible with you with similar interest.

  5. #5
    Latin Stallion's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dating girl for a month (non exclusive). Help!

    I need another opinion. So, last Saturday where she left early for my bday was the last time I had seem her until two days ago (Friday 18th). We went out for dinner, talked. She told me she was looking for another job and that one she was looking at might be a rode job and the employer asked her if she had a bf. She said she said no, and she said, I'm not talking to anyone right now. So, I didn't make a fuss but I was upset because I know we aren't a couple but we have been going on dates for over a MONTH. Like wtf. So, I told her I liked her, blah blah blah. Told her I never really chase women, I care more about my work and money. Made her realize that I wasn't playing games with her. Told her I think she's a good mom etc and I like that. I pretty much did a brief overlay and let her know I think she's cool and I hinted to us dating. She was saying her parents and bro kinda want her to be focused on herself and not date anyone right now.

    Oh, and she was running late for our date so I sent her a joking message saying "Next date, I am picking your ass up lol" She told me she doesn't want anyone to know where she lives. Like dude wtf bro. She doesn't know that I know but she let him take her home one night. She had posted a pic of her in his car saying "He has no choice but to take me home haha" I have known her for years and we have been talking for over a month. Anyway, after dinner, we went to meet up with her bro and his girl and another friend. We drank and smoked hookah. It was decent. She was still a bit resistant and we didn't have any touching. After leaving to the bathroom for a bit, I talked to her bro and told him how she looks sad and I like spending time with his sister and I just like to see her happy etc. He was like "Yeah, that's how she is sometimes. Just spend more time with her".

    Well we left around 130am. She told me she didn't want to stay out too long because she had to work in the morning. Well, I gave her this stuffed animal I had picked up for her daughter and she smiled. Leaned in an let me kiss her cheek again, ughhhhh. Anyway, I was disappointed but whatever. She told me to text her when I got home. So, I sent her a message saying home around 150ish. She replies at 3 something. Next morning I go on Instagram and I see a pic of her and two chicks at a nightclub and I was TOTALLY cool with that. No big deal. So, as the day went on I checked Instagram again and she had liked a pic of that same damn guy and it was a pic of her and him sitting down in a club. She was wearing the same thing so it was from that night we were out. I had posted a two pics of me and her on Instagram, I took them down after that. Made me super pissed. Haven't said anything to her yet about anything. Makes me think she left my bday last Saturday to be with him. Opinions???

  6. #6
    Fire Eater is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dating girl for a month (non exclusive). Help!

    My opinion is that you follow our advice, and move on. There are plenty of other fish in the sea so don't get hooked on this one girl.

    I advise you don't give her compliments until after she has tried to prove herself to you and sought your validation. The way I am thinking is when it comes to attraction, women like a challenge, and I think you are making the contest too easy for her. I think she still sees you as a friend.

  7. #7
    Latin Stallion's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dating girl for a month (non exclusive). Help!

    Ok. Dude I greatly appreciate all the advice. I will take it. So, posting pics of me and other chicks on the Instagram that I KNOW she will see will create a jealousy plot and hopefully make her want to earn me. I went out last night with some other chicks. Took pics with one but she's not the best looking. I have older pics of me and chicks who are hot though. I am going to talk to other chicks also but not going to lie. I would still like to be with this girl. I will have to just give her less attention. I'm not gonna message her unless she messages me first. Play it cool and hope for the best. Best way to get out of the friend zone???

  8. #8
    Latin Stallion's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dating girl for a month (non exclusive). Help!

    need another opinion. So, last Saturday where she left early for my bday was the last time I had seem her until two days ago (Friday 18th). We went out for dinner, talked. She told me she was looking for another job and that one she was looking at might be a rode job and the employer asked her if she had a bf. She said she said no, and she said, I'm not talking to anyone right now. So, I didn't make a fuss but I was upset because I know we aren't a couple but we have been going on dates for over a MONTH. Like wtf. So, I told her I liked her, blah blah blah. Told her I never really chase women, I care more about my work and money. Made her realize that I wasn't playing games with her. Told her I think she's a good mom etc and I like that. I pretty much did a brief overlay and let her know I think she's cool and I hinted to us dating. She was saying her parents and bro kinda want her to be focused on herself and not date anyone right now.

    Oh, and she was running late for our date so I sent her a joking message saying "Next date, I am picking your ass up lol" She told me she doesn't want anyone to know where she lives. Like dude wtf bro. She doesn't know that I know but she let him take her home one night. She had posted a pic of her in his car saying "He has no choice but to take me home haha" I have known her for years and we have been talking for over a month. Anyway, after dinner, we went to meet up with her bro and his girl and another friend. We drank and smoked hookah. It was decent. She was still a bit resistant and we didn't have any touching. After leaving to the bathroom for a bit, I talked to her bro and told him how she looks sad and I like spending time with his sister and I just like to see her happy etc. He was like "Yeah, that's how she is sometimes. Just spend more time with her".

    Well we left around 130am. She told me she didn't want to stay out too long because she had to work in the morning. Well, I gave her this stuffed animal I had picked up for her daughter and she smiled. Leaned in an let me kiss her cheek again, ughhhhh. Anyway, I was disappointed but whatever. She told me to text her when I got home. So, I sent her a message saying home around 150ish. She replies at 3 something. Next morning I go on Instagram and I see a pic of her and two chicks at a nightclub and I was TOTALLY cool with that. No big deal. So, as the day went on I checked Instagram again and she had liked a pic of that same damn guy and it was a pic of her and him sitting down in a club. She was wearing the same thing so it was from that night we were out. I had posted a two pics of me and her on Instagram, I took them down after that. Made me super pissed. Haven't said anything to her yet about anything. Makes me think she left my bday last Saturday to be with him. Opinions???

  9. #9
    Fire Eater is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dating girl for a month (non exclusive). Help!

    Quote Originally Posted by Latin Stallion View Post
    Ok. Dude I greatly appreciate all the advice. I will take it. So, posting pics of me and other chicks on the Instagram that I KNOW she will see will create a jealousy plot and hopefully make her want to earn me. I went out last night with some other chicks. Took pics with one but she's not the best looking. I have older pics of me and chicks who are hot though. I am going to talk to other chicks also but not going to lie. I would still like to be with this girl. I will have to just give her less attention. I'm not gonna message her unless she messages me first. Play it cool and hope for the best. Best way to get out of the friend zone???
    We've all been there. I think that is a start in the right direction, and remember to avoid one-itis.

  10. #10
    I.M.Mortal's Avatar
    I.M.Mortal is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dating girl for a month (non exclusive). Help!

    Made me super pissed. Haven't said anything to her yet about anything. Makes me think she left my bday last Saturday to be with him. Opinions???
    Stallion,

    The truth is she is more attracted to someone else and you are getting placed on the backburner into the friendzone while she could be fvcking another guy. Your kind of story is very similar to what a lot AFCs go through. The girl doesn't let you kiss her and makes "excuses" but with another dude she suddenly becomes a hypocrite. I know, it would piss off any guy because it's a blow to our ego.

    Now I don't know what your background or how adept you are in the PUA arts, but you most likely lost her because you didn't have much active value in your "dates" with her. Your conversations didn't spark her emotions and you fell into the trap of normal guys with their small talk (which btw does absolutely nothing in a woman's mind). Not attractive enough.

    We also don't know what the other dude does. His profession or w/e might have status. If that is the case, his passive value wins in that department.

    If your passive values are equal, then he is beating you out in terms of active value. Whatever he is saying/doing to her, he is coming off as more attractive. "He has no choice but to take me home." That is a clear ioi for him where her sense of logic goes out the window, whereas for you she makes excuses.

    If you are new to PUA, no matter what we tell you, this doesn't look like a situation you will win unless the other guy fvcks up or lets her go. Then she will rebound to you, which makes you the rebound guy.

    Hopefully, this serves as a wake up call for you. Get better in the art of seduction, and start using the less attractive girls as batting practice. Personally, I would stop seeing her. She is leaving your Bday party early to be with this dude and has the gall to post it on instagram for you to see? To keep taking it like this does you no good for your confidence. It makes you into her bitch and she is gelding you.

    Start getting your value and game up so you can start dating 9 - 10s latina hardbodies.


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