Re: Girlfriend's male friend!!
Whew. That was alot. Tough man. Tough.
The male friend issue is a old and tiring one. It spans centuries lol. But I feel there is a difference between addressing an issue and reinforcing one. When you find yourself fighting about the same thing over and over it is no longer addressing an issue and it just makes things worse.
When it comes to love you have to accept the person as a whole. Even the parts you don't like. It's just about what are you willing to live with. And buddy, a few odd texts are nothing to end a relationship. I've been through far far crazier things and I'm still with her and things are much more stable now. We still have bad times, but the crazy times are pretty much behind us.
Should you be ok with her male friend? Absolutely not. You don't have to be. What you DO have to do is stop fighting about him. You're just pushing her away and into him. You gotta understand people are going to do what they want to do. You have to change her wanting to spend time with him to wanting to make you happy by not talking to him and you don't do that by trying to "reason" with her. That's the bad way on trying to approach this thing.
In simple terms it's easier for opposite sex friends to just not exist. But that's not the world we live in. And the fact she knew him before she met you basically doesn't give you much right to dictate if she can be friends with him or not. You have to work around that.
What to do? You have to show a bit of indifference when he comes up. When she says she's going to see him just say ok and become a little distance. Not miserable. Distant. Basically she only gets the best of you when she does what you like. That is the punishment /reward system. Arguing is actually a form of reward. But that's a whole other discussion.
The other thing to do is a bit of reverse psychology. Say to her a few times over the course of the next month "People are going to do what they want to do. If you want to see him then go ahead. I know you will anyways. And I won't stop you."
People tend to want to feel unique. So categorizing her as someone who does what they want can have an effect of her not wanting to be stereotyped and she will do the opposite. Sounds silly, but it works more often than it doesn't. And you telling her to go see him may provoke the feeling she does not want to be told what to do so again she may do the opposite. And saying "I know you will anyways" has the effect of you almost predicting her behavior and people tend to not like that either. Of course this is not guaranteed, but it can definitely work if done right at the right time.
Don't overuse this statement otherwise it'll lose its power. Just say it a few times just to establish your views of the situation.
If you ever need to talk about it again look at it as you are simply telling her what you don't like and not telling her what to do. It HAS to be her decision to not talk to him so don't take that away otherwise she'll just keep going back to him.
"All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."