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Thread: To hook up or not to hook up - ramifications on future LTR

  1. #1
    klngofstring is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default To hook up or not to hook up - ramifications on future LTR

    First of all thanks for your help, I am pretty new to this all and my questions are probably pretty basic.

    A female friend of mine was dumped by her boyfriend about a month ago. Since then she has been sticking to me way more then usual, I attribute this to loneliness stemming from the breakup. I like this girl and want the opportunity to see where a relationship would go with her but I realize that right now is not the time for that. Additionally she is leaving in a few weeks and I probably won't see her for a couple of months.

    My question is will escalating now (anywhere from first base to home) benefit me or not in regards to an LTR in the future? I have plans to hang out with her tomorrow and I could just keep things at the low level flirting where then have been or I can try to push things forward.

  2. #2
    drgnsfire12 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: To hook up or not to hook up - ramifications on future LTR

    I would keep things on an even keel for now and wait until she returns in a few months to push forward. This gives her a few more months to get over the ex and you don't get involved in a LDR right off the bat. What I would do while she is away is slowly escalate via text .... I'm currently doing this with a girl in Europe who is coming back to the US in June ..... I've gotten it to where she is dying to see me and can't wait for us to go out and hit the town ..... work the text well, and you'll be what she is thinking about when she returns ........ GL
    "The purpose of our lives is to be happy" - his Holiness the Dalai Llama of Tibet

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    klngofstring (04-22-2015)

  4. #3
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    meteora is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: To hook up or not to hook up - ramifications on future LTR

    I see 2 options, your strengths and weaknesses will determine witch route to go with.

    1. you can sleep with her now as friends with benefits, and just stay in contact enough for her to remember you and hook up more times once she comes back. eventually escalating from casual sex to relationship. (note, this is not the same as having a long distance relationship. its basically farking her on and off until you both decide you want more than that)

    the advantage to this strategy is that hooking up with her 3 months from now will be much easier because the two of you have a sexual history. plus it will help to keep the distance from drawing you guys apart and it certainly will keep you out of the friend zone.

    the downside is that she might see it as a mere bounce back, and thus move on over the summer.

    2. you can wait it out. stay good friends and flirt with her when you can, till she gets back. then fark her and turn it into a relationship. (this strategie will work if you have good patience and good text game. the latter is not my strong point witch is why I personally tend to avoid this kind of strategy)

    the advantage is that it gives her more time to recover, and it gives you more time to get to know her. (if you're looking to get married and have lots of babies this is the strategie for you)

    the downside is that she may recover fast enough to get another man over the summer and thus you lose out completely.

    the decision is up to you. its like having won 100 thousand dollars at poker and having the choice to either play for a million and risk everything or leave the table and enjoy the 100 thousand you've already won. in my experiences, opportunities don't last forever. so to me, ceasing the moment is probably better than waiting it out and risking what I've already won.

    but don't let me decide for you, do what you feel is in your best interest. this could be the start of something good.

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    klngofstring (04-25-2015)

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