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  1. #1
    flash Guest

    Default i need your help?

    Hey guys,

    first post here! and i need you help. i've been gaming for a while after being introduced to it by a friend, i've read "the game" and "the mystery method" along with videos that both style and mystery have put out there and i often browse this forum and usually got the answers i needed whenever i got stuck or hit a wall and its always been a great help so i want to say a big thank you to you guys. but now i need your help, ok let me give you the sciffy.

    ok so about 2 and half months back im at a club, a gigs going on and in the corner of my eye i see this red vixon with lip piercings, the moment i saw her i knew i needed to have her so got a mate who knew her to bring her over, from here i negged her a few times and started abit of fluffing and by the end of the night got her name and was told to give her a add on facebook, which i did. From here i got her number and within a few days got myself a date with her which ended with a kiss close, to cut a long story short i've been dating her now for about 2 months and we have done everything except full close (not becuase she didn't want to but because everytime we want to her brother is in the next room and we don't exactly want him to hear us), she's a great girl but has had a tough life and been messed about quite abit by boys in the past, she has quite low self-esteem and i have been told by her im alot better looking than alot of her past boyfriends, all sounds good yeah?

    ...here's the problem, we can go out or go over her's and its all great but then its always me texting her afterwards, and making contact with her (apart from the occasion once or twice). If i leave it a few days then i get a text or something but acting like im not intrested doesn't help me and at one point she went on holidays and i left if 3 days from the day she came back to get in contact, in which time she contacted me and when we did go out and have a great time i was told by her a few days later she was sorry she didn't contact me as soon as she came back because she feared i might have got myself a girlfriend. what i need from you guys is help on how to play it, negging won't work as her self esteem is low but then i don't want to come across as needy and keep texting her, or leave it and have her think i have lostintrest. but i know she likes me and she is soo worth the trouble, so help on how to play this please guys.

    thanks
    Flash

    :edit:
    sorry if this is in the worng place feel free to move this to the dating forum.
    Last edited by flash; 08-22-2010 at 07:57 PM.

  2. #2
    Salaami Guest

    Default Re: i need your help?

    I never found a problem with telling girls (after ive dated them for a while) things like this.

    "It would make me really happy if you started our conversations once in a while, I know I'm weird but hey thats why you love me :P"

    Something along the lines of that.

    Last girl I was that direct with (I told her that I really appreciate it when girls ask me to hang out with them) has set up like 3 dates between me and her since I told her (two weeks ago).

  3. #3
    flash Guest

    Default Re: i need your help?

    ahh ok, i just didn't wanna come acorss as abit needy by saying to her stuff that would imply im like "hey, give something back here" but i guess thats not really being needy thats more taking charge and being honest. i'll give this a go, thank you.

    any other advice is welcomed

  4. #4
    Coyote Guest

    Default Re: i need your help?

    Quote Originally Posted by flash View Post
    ahh ok, i just didn't wanna come acorss as abit needy by saying to her stuff that would imply im like "hey, give something back here" but i guess thats not really being needy thats more taking charge and being honest. i'll give this a go, thank you.

    any other advice is welcomed
    yeah flash, i got one of them atm... same sorta situation and to tell you the truth i am getting bored of her. everyone who meets her goes on about how gorgeous she is etc... and i am going yeah she is cool, like her, but in the relationship i am doing most of the giving and i am finding i am too busy for her and our times are getting less and less congruent

    dont get me wrong, cool chick and i like her, but i am not so in love with her that i am going to chase her and all that how chumps probably have for her in the past

    i would be keen seeing what answers you get but this one i am hapy to let go. i actually like her as a friend and would want to keep the friendship so maybe i LJBF her and use her as a Pivot....?

  5. #5
    flash Guest

    Default Re: i need your help?

    i got some where last night/ this morning,

    i have taken your infomation on board and have been telling her its up to her to sort out our next date as i always do it, i had to do this via text as she is curently up her granparents but this i where i got smart! i had decided the other day that i was going to appeal to her low self-steem be her rock almost, she told me the other week that she got quite upset when one of her best mates was off with her and told her she was never going to save the money she needed by next summer for her trip to america and she was having doubts i realised at this point that the way to play it was to be supportive of important things to her while also re-assuring her that she could do it,but i just needed the the chance as i had missed it with this america trip, then last night it happened...

    ..so we was texting, i was text gaming her like i usually do and then she tells me she had a awful day as uni had messed up her accomadation and she had to find a place to live there and then, she had been ringing round all day and geting no where and was pretty much whiping out! via text i offered suggestions and was adding in "if anyone can sort it out its you" and "you don't give yourself enough credit, you'll be fine" and they went done quite well with me having answers to my text within seconds. i told her to let me know when she had sorted it and through abit of cocky funny in there to end, this was at 8.50pm. i went out and when i came back in i jumped on facebook and saw her friend online, she was trying to help her out, so i told her to give me a shout if she needed a hand (i thought this was quite a clever way of getting her mate onside even though i was being sincere). About 12.15am i give her a ring, and ask if she had sorted it she hadn't but she sounded very happy to hear my voice. i put a false time constraint on the call telling her i couldn't talk for long and by the end of the conversation we was flirting and even joking about her having to live with me if her house isn't sorted, of course i put a neg in there for good measure "cool, i need a maid and my floor has loads of room for you to sleep" i said, she loved it and was like "no i have to sleep in the bed with you". abit more fluffing and talks about what i had done today and she was like "oh we she go swimming together" it was going great, abit of convo her and there and then i brouht it to a close, i told her i had to go and to let me know when she had sorted it, i said "don't worry, you'll get it done i have faith in you" (wanted to appeal to her self esteem once again and then hung up..

    ...this morning at 10.30am i have a call, its her "i sorted my place" she said, "see told you you would, i had faith" i replied with. she told me it was sorted about 5 minutes ago and that i was the first person she wanted to ring and tell (even before her mate Hannah who had been up all night helping her lol), we fluffed abit and it ended with her asking when i was going to the upcoming festival and she sounded generally gutted when i said i was going on wednesday, the same day she came back. she told me she will sort sometihng out and will see me as soon as i come back, and then we said goodbye and hung up.

    i know it sounds stupid but she is usually closed off, she has had a really rough life and has a hard time letting people in. this morning though it felt like i had finally been allowed into her life, now to stay there


    - FLASH

  6. #6
    Coyote Guest

    Default Re: i need your help?

    Quote Originally Posted by flash View Post
    i got some where last night/ this morning,

    i have taken your infomation on board and have been telling her its up to her to sort out our next date as i always do it, i had to do this via text as she is curently up her granparents but this i where i got smart! i had decided the other day that i was going to appeal to her low self-steem be her rock almost, she told me the other week that she got quite upset when one of her best mates was off with her and told her she was never going to save the money she needed by next summer for her trip to america and she was having doubts i realised at this point that the way to play it was to be supportive of important things to her while also re-assuring her that she could do it,but i just needed the the chance as i had missed it with this america trip, then last night it happened...

    ..so we was texting, i was text gaming her like i usually do and then she tells me she had a awful day as uni had messed up her accomadation and she had to find a place to live there and then, she had been ringing round all day and geting no where and was pretty much whiping out! via text i offered suggestions and was adding in "if anyone can sort it out its you" and "you don't give yourself enough credit, you'll be fine" and they went done quite well with me having answers to my text within seconds. i told her to let me know when she had sorted it and through abit of cocky funny in there to end, this was at 8.50pm. i went out and when i came back in i jumped on facebook and saw her friend online, she was trying to help her out, so i told her to give me a shout if she needed a hand (i thought this was quite a clever way of getting her mate onside even though i was being sincere). About 12.15am i give her a ring, and ask if she had sorted it she hadn't but she sounded very happy to hear my voice. i put a false time constraint on the call telling her i couldn't talk for long and by the end of the conversation we was flirting and even joking about her having to live with me if her house isn't sorted, of course i put a neg in there for good measure "cool, i need a maid and my floor has loads of room for you to sleep" i said, she loved it and was like "no i have to sleep in the bed with you". abit more fluffing and talks about what i had done today and she was like "oh we she go swimming together" it was going great, abit of convo her and there and then i brouht it to a close, i told her i had to go and to let me know when she had sorted it, i said "don't worry, you'll get it done i have faith in you" (wanted to appeal to her self esteem once again and then hung up..

    ...this morning at 10.30am i have a call, its her "i sorted my place" she said, "see told you you would, i had faith" i replied with. she told me it was sorted about 5 minutes ago and that i was the first person she wanted to ring and tell (even before her mate Hannah who had been up all night helping her lol), we fluffed abit and it ended with her asking when i was going to the upcoming festival and she sounded generally gutted when i said i was going on wednesday, the same day she came back. she told me she will sort sometihng out and will see me as soon as i come back, and then we said goodbye and hung up.

    i know it sounds stupid but she is usually closed off, she has had a really rough life and has a hard time letting people in. this morning though it felt like i had finally been allowed into her life, now to stay there


    - FLASH
    good. i can see a lot of similarity between your situation and mine and i can see how your solution applies to my situation. thanks for that one.

    you have gone a further way in than i have and i have been playing around the labia so to speak... your expose could help me drive it right through

    i sorta cant be stuffed with her atm though... but if this same pattern reoccurs with another then we have a good blue print here for getting through some of that shit

    cheers flash


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