I don't know how to make eye contact comfortably

Hi. I'm extremely inexperienced, and today I learned that I am a WBAFC, unfortunately. I don't know how to make eye contact with women, which seems to be one of the most important aspects of approaching them. I feel incredibly uncomfortable with eye contact from both women and men. I can't even make eye contact with my mom.

How do I fix this?

Brada ,you need to be taken under my wing. 1st thing is that if you where drunk you would not have that problem ,but i am not telling you drink it goes deep down ,for me to help you ,you must tell me the reason for you being scared to make eye contact

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Dont have routines as the cards in your deck ,have skill instead ,because once a routine is done ,its done ,you cant do it again in the same interaction ,but skills can be done over and over ,so then you could play a card twice.

Eye Contact is naturally a way of establishing dominance. Sometimes, proper eye contact while speaking is considered respect. Keep these in mind, practice is every day, do it for your job, your family, etc etc. When I learned this, I discovered that many people look away (subdued) while few keep that eye contact (holding their ground). Practice this, its to your advantage

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-Pierrot

Thanks for answering. I thought the death squads were being dispatched.

Striker9: I appreciate your wish to help. Believe me I want help. I require a holistic approach, but then again starting at the very basics of socializing (Eye contact is paramount, I know) would be helpful. Arg, I just had an AFC moment when I asked myself what you asked me. I nearly shed a tear, ffs, damn. I answered to myself "Because I'm certain she'll just see a monster". Sad huh? You can check out my rant in ask an expert to see my sincerity about getting better diatribe. I'm just at the bottom of the barrel. So it sounds really pathetic, but I really don't like doing the whole self pity thing, and its so ingrained in me to talk this way (even though I don't actually FEEL that way most of the time) that my words, even if they're well chosen, come across pathetically. Bad eh? (see?) Thanks for the consideration.

Pierrot: I appreciate the lesson (seriously), I never thought of it in terms of respect, it made me think of some places in China where conversely it is disrespectful to make eye contact? (Please don't suggest I move there XD)

Here comes the bad part. I want to. I really do. If anything I'd just like to be able to look at a stunning woman and appreciate her (That is not to say idolize her, just, you know, like looking at a nice river or some such bs). I don't have much of an opportunity to practice. I don't work (I'm disabled, I have Asperger's Syndrome. My mom doesn't even really make eye contact with me (shes my only family). I just can't stop making excuses, I want to stop so much. I can say it out loud right now in the middle of town! "I'm WBAFC, I'm lonely, I never get laid, I don't even know a single fckin girl! HELP!" But I can't figure out why I can't change the way I think, yet. I know I can do it. And it frustrates me just writing about it. My life is not an adequate representation of what life is about!

In short. Where to next from here?

I know Aspergers syndrome will seriously affect your progress, but the first thing i need you to do is get into the Mindset.

"I'm WBAFC, I'm lonely, I never get laid, I don't even know a single fckin girl! HELP!"

IS NOT WHAT YOU WANT TO SAY NOR THINK.

you must THINK THE OPPOSITE FOR THIS TO GO ANYWHERE

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-Pierrot

Check my own personal training method. I wrote a thread about it so you should be able to find it on my page. It should help with your anxiety a bit. the good thing about it is there's no pressure. Check it out.

Im guessing you never had staring contests when you were younger, well now is a great time to start so you can get used to eye contact,just get a female friend of yours and challenge them,you'll get used to it in no time, that's how I got over my fear of eye contact

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"Give her the gift of missing you" david d

You should try to make eye contact with anyone on the street, when you are talking with your friends and you are absorbed by your conversation and you are not thinking about your limiting beliefs. Keep the eye contact, until they look away, because that shows confidence.

You need to practice. Eye contact doesn't really have to be eye to eye if you're uncomfortable. Look at somewhere near the eye but not directly. When you can do it comfortably, you try looking at their eyes, not for long periods, just glance and look somewhere else.