hey guys, this is my first post here, so thanks in advance for any help. my girlfriend of 4 yrs broke up with me last week. now just to give a little history, we were in love, talked about marriage, i will be 27 in 2 weeks, she will be 29 in august. we went away together, spent almost everyday together. The "honeymoon" phase seemed to have lasted the first year and a half at least.
anyway on to the downhill part. last year at this time she wanted a break. she wasnt happy with me becuase i was falling into a routine, become boring and i seemed to fall asleep a lot. understandable i guess. anyway, i decided to agree with it, told her i guess it was for the best. so basically the whole summer we were on a "break". now during this time, i didnt go out of my way to call her or even see her necessarily. she did however call me pretty much everyday, and we hung out just not like before. we probably saw eachother maybe 2-3 times a week instead of most days. we even had sex throughout most of the summer, obviously not as often as before but that was still there. things basically worked themselves out after like 2- 2.5 months ad we were basically back to normal. i was trying to be less boring, a little more exciting, and less sleepy. i mean i was literally go to see her and falling asleep within an hour, surpirsed she didnt breakup with me! anyway, things were better, we even went to vegas 2 times since, going good.
now the bad again. in december i lost a cousin, he was my age, then my younger brother gets diagnosed with cancer. way to start the new year. obviously shit isnt going well in my life at this point. now she was there for me and my family the entire time, never a doubt about that. she even came on vacation with us for my brother's make a wish. she is part of my family as i am hers. now this is not the reason for the breakup, but with everything going on, i guess i got alittle on the lazy side again, had much on my mind. last month or so my brother finished his chemo, so far free of any cancer and doing well. within this time i started noticing her losing her interest again. my stupid ass didnt do anything about it. she wanted to plan a vactaion with me for the summer, i kept saying let me know when, but never took the initiative to look myself. again just an example of where i was screwing up.
so before breakup she was very distant. havent seen here now in 2.5 weeks. last week we actually broke up, over the phone. the weird part is, she never stopped calling me, not as often as before but still pretty much everyday. during the breakup, she told me how much she loved me, still called me by my pet name she has for me, still to this day she does too, and how miserable she was about it. even said how miserable she was that she was not going to my brothers high school graduation the very next day. so i told her i guess its for the best, i still just want to see you happy. she said she just wasnt happy with our situation. so i agreed we were going downhill, told her if this is what you want then fine.
next day she calls crying how miserable she is, we were supposed to work, why did it have to happen, i just told her she will be fine, i even said she will find someone who will make here happy and all. she responded she didnt want that, she just wants to curl up and cry forever. we ended the conversation with an "i love you" and i said call me if you need me, i am always here.
since then i have heard from here everyday, even exchanged an i love you the other day. today she called i said what are you up to tonight, we havent seen eachother, she said she wants to see me but doesnt want to.
so i guess i just need help, i love this girl a ton, it really fealt like the real deal, i mean i love here family as if they are my own. and i know she feels the same about mine, so what i guess i am asking is, is there still a chance for me, and what should i do to make sure it works out the weay i want. sorry for long post but im really hurting and i love this girl, just want to make this all go away.