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Thread: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

  1. #31
    swiftstep is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    I have to say you have made a good start. Many guYs make the mistake of text/call/email spamming their ex with 'TAKE ME BACK' MESSAGES. SO TWO THUMBS UP FOR YOU!

    What you should do, and I'm sure this has been said before is to remove her from your Facebook. MAKE SURE YOU REMOVE HER! Don't let her remove you as it will give her the power/control. I remember when I broke up with an old ex, she removed me and it DROVE ME CRAZY! Suddenly I couldn't see what she was doing, had no idea and it drove me mad! So make sure you take the action NOT HER! Also keep doing what your doing, meet people, get out, carry on living your life! And last but not least if you do get in touch or speak on the phone, keep it short and sweet. Be funny, cheeky, but keep it short. If she starts asking too many questions it means she is DYING to know what you have been up to like meeting other girls. Just say you have to go, or that you door bell just rung, etc, etc to get out of the conversation.

    Hope this helps!

  2. #32
    liukang75 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    yeah bro, i hear you, i STILL haven't heard from her since the sexual text message, i wrote her back ' dont be offended, it means nothing, but i havent been with anyone in 2 months so thats why, i guess i'll wait to hear from you ' , lol


    You need to come back to this site and ask people before sending messages like this. You WANT to create competitive anxiety here man! You WANT her to wonder if you've been with anyone else! The last thing you want to do when trying to get back an ex is tell her that haven't had sex in 2 months! It's these kind of beta-statements that are killing your chances with her. Didn't I send you to Shark's blog? You're killing me Smalls!
    “The great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement; you ought not to be thinking of whether it ends in victory or defeat. Let nature take its course, and your tools will strike at the right moment.” -Bruce Lee

  3. #33
    1000steps is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    Can we please stay on topic in this thread? I need my own suggestions.

    Victory, you are desperate for this girl. That is very unattractive. You need to take space and start healing. Then, maybe, you will have a shot at rekindling a romance.

    Swiftstep, at this point I don't see why I should delete her off facebook. I can guarantee you 100% that she won't delete me. We're on good terms. We never fought. And I'm not constantly on her profile either. She can do whatever she wants. I was never controlling during our 2.5 years, let alone now!

  4. #34
    liukang75 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    If you think you can deal with it don't delete her. But what happens if she posts pics of her and another guy or her status changes to "in a relationship"? Will you be able to deal with it then? If you can then cool, more power to you. Just be aware: women use facebook to throw major shit-tests.
    “The great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement; you ought not to be thinking of whether it ends in victory or defeat. Let nature take its course, and your tools will strike at the right moment.” -Bruce Lee

  5. #35
    1000steps is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    I know her well and I believe it isn't likely at all that she goes into a new relationship so soon. If she does then fark it.. I'll continue studying game and take my life from there.

    Now about that email and no contact I mentioned earlier, what do you guys think?

  6. #36
    liukang75 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    Her messaging you about school projects doesn't translate to anything more than her just trying to keep you as an orbiter. You're best bet is to CUT HER OFF COMPLETELY--this lets her know that you're not the orbiting type of guy and that she loses you completely by breaking-up with you. Do you really want to just be her friend? How about when she calls you to ask your advice about her dating life? Will you want to stay her friend then?

    You don't have to be immature about things. Just tell her that you would like to keep her as a friend but maybe it's for the best if you two didn't stay in touch right now. It's when you start letting go of them that they start sniffing around and getting attracted again.
    “The great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement; you ought not to be thinking of whether it ends in victory or defeat. Let nature take its course, and your tools will strike at the right moment.” -Bruce Lee

  7. #37
    1000steps is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    I understand what you're saying. The no contact is working, though. I am now sure that she knows I'm not just sitting at my computer waiting for her emails or messages.

    Just now I was active on facebook joking with friends and visiting posts etc.. I wasn't active for about two days. Anyway, she messaged me privately immediately and after some very short small talk she asked me what I've been up to, and ''it's been awhile since I heard from you .''

    I told her I'm busy with my two projects etc etc.. she wished me good luck, some small talk and then I left. We interacted for about 3 minutes and it looks like she is quite curious about me.

    So I'll continue with no contact again. As for being an orbiter I really don't think I'm giving off that vibe. At all. Like I said, I never initiated contact.. I didn't always reply and when I did it was cheerful and short.

    I assume you disagree with me because I didn't cut her off completely. ?

  8. #38
    liukang75 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    You are just a friend right now which=orbiter. I don't know all of the in's and out's of your relationship with her so it's hard to disagree with you completely for not cutting her off. You're the only one who knows what the best thing to do is... I just know from experience that staying friends with a woman isn't healthy if what you want is more than that. There comes a point when you have to do damage control to save yourself and to take care of your own needs. I think that you're definitely in a good spot with her contacting you though... Just keep playing hard to get.
    “The great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement; you ought not to be thinking of whether it ends in victory or defeat. Let nature take its course, and your tools will strike at the right moment.” -Bruce Lee

  9. #39
    1000steps is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    Thanks. I understand your concerns. In this situation I wouldn't even consider myself her friend. But I do see your point so I'll watch out for that.

  10. #40
    liukang75 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    Just don't respond to her right away for anything. Try to respond hours later, or the next day if possible and keep your messages short. Try to build up to a playful, teasing vibe with your messages. It sounds like you're pretty mature about the whole situation so I guess not cutting her off completely might just work out for you. Good luck!
    “The great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement; you ought not to be thinking of whether it ends in victory or defeat. Let nature take its course, and your tools will strike at the right moment.” -Bruce Lee


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