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Thread: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

  1. #61
    liukang75 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    So what if all she said she wanted was friendship. Women don't even know exactly what it is that they truly want. It's up to you as a man to lead her where you want her. My ex told me two weeks before getting back together that she had "no desire to get back together with me" and tried to play that LJBF's card. I did the same thing to her mixed with pua tactics and she crumbled.

    I would suggest the "hey can you do me a favor text?" When she responds tell her "nevermind, it's o.k.". It will drive her nuts wondering what you were going to ask her. You can keep that one going for a couple of days and it will open the door so you can initiate conversation again. She'll welcome any interaction with you just to figure out what you were going to say. Women love mystery.

    When she pushes it again--and she will, tell her that: "I was going to ask you if it could always be this way between us, even if either one of us started dating someone else--that we could always be friends like this. But, I realized it could never be that way forever and that's why I said nevermind... I didn't want to ruin what we now have."


    That would be the equivalent of launching a cruise missile directly at her heart. I wouldn't recommend this tactic to people that aren't where you are at right now though.
    “The great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement; you ought not to be thinking of whether it ends in victory or defeat. Let nature take its course, and your tools will strike at the right moment.” -Bruce Lee

  2. #62
    1000steps is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    Victory: Keep going with the NC, it should be for the best. Good luck.

    Liukang: I'm curious. Where did you learn text-game? And actual seduction?

    I'm having a few ideas about what to do next but so far it's back to NC.

  3. #63
    1000steps is offline PUA in Training
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    The internet my friend! There's a ton of information out there. I started on The Game by Neil Struass. Then, The Mystery Method: How to Get a Beautiful Woman Into Bed. Mystery's videos on youtube were also very helpful. Youtube has a bunch of inner game/seduction videos.

  4. #64
    liukang75 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    Relax, it's too late to ignore her now but you're still in a good spot. Don't iniate any texts with her from here on out and don't respond right away. Make her chase and give her breadcrumbs, not the whole sandwich!
    “The great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement; you ought not to be thinking of whether it ends in victory or defeat. Let nature take its course, and your tools will strike at the right moment.” -Bruce Lee

  5. #65
    1000steps is offline PUA in Training
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    I initiated once so far. Thinking about it as investments, she's put in far, far more to keep contact than I have. The next step would be to post a few pictures with me and some girl/s on fb! That would probably make her crazy with fear of loss.

  6. #66
    1000steps is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    Small update:

    It's now exactly two weeks since we last went out, kissed etc.. It's been incredible in self-development for me. Everyday was like a whole new life, each better than the last. Still have a way to go but I know I'll get there because I was there before.

    As for the situation with the ex, not initiating contact has saved any chances there might have been of a reunion. However, responding to her texts almost every time was probably a few steps back. The most she has waited to contact me was two days. I texted her once in the evening because I had been pretty cold that day. She was responsive and happy to hear from me. Yesterday, however, she texted me once, I replied and that was it. It's true that I didn't make some huge effort to keep any conversation going but neither did she. This leads me to think that it could have been too soon to contact her first the day before. And also I should stop analyzing so much and just get on with my life.

    Now. Back to no contact for the weekend. If she texts/emails me with something trivial (such as her fb poke some days ago which I didn't react to) I will choose to ignore it. We'll see where this leads to. In the meantime I plan to get a date with a girl I met recently and probably post some non-provocative photos of us on fb to keep everyone wondering. This will be great for my confidence, and it will also be great if she's interesting and there is something there besides a pretty young face.

    After that I'll email my ex an old and funny photo of us I found on my old laptop. The email will be titled 'lol found this on the old laptop' or something similar. And if everything goes well up to this point and a bit beyond I will attempt to get her out to see me in person.

    Edit: As I'm writing this she liked a link I posted on fb and commented about how she remember this video fondly. (It's a funny video that I like and one time we watched it together some 2 years ago. I didn't post it to remember us or anything, I genuinely like it).

  7. #67
    1000steps is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    I've never had this incredible urge to call her like I do right now! *facepalm.

  8. #68
    Saund128 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    I actually called my ex on Friday morning. I know I said I wouldn't but I asked her if she wants to get together before this wedding. She agreed. I could tell she was nervous which I guess is a good thing. I don't expect much from it. She actually asked how I was getting to the wedding, which I floated around answering it. Said we would talk about it next week. If she asks me to ride there together I gotta say no right? Or somehow say no without seeming cold?

    Sorry, I know this isn't my thread.

  9. #69
    1000steps is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    That's ok as long as we don't stray too much afar from topic. As for your question, why not reframe it into a joke like 'We're not together anymore, I'd have to charge you for a ride.. :P' something like that? I don't know, dude. I can't help much at the moment. I had an emotionally rough day - for some reason I missed her a lot.

    I worked out. Read some material. Did some stuff. Went out. Going out again. And yet she's on my mind. (Mostly got a nagging voice telling me 'she's over you man').

  10. #70
    Saund128 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: break up after 2.5years; want suggestions

    I know what you mean. I like to look at it like a test. A really hard test. The biggest problem I have about it, is just thinking how unfair it is that she could be completely over it and fine while I am miserable at times thinking about it. Thanks for the advice. Stay strong, she is probably thinking about it more than you think.


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