Top 10 Stats
Latest Posts Loading... Loading...
Loading...
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 11 to 16 of 16
  1. #11
    MrDiesel is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 77, Level: 1
    Level completed: 54%, Points required for next Level: 23
    Overall activity: 0%
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Brisbane, Australia
    Posts
    16
    Points
    77
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    9

    Default Re: Any chance if she broke up due to age gap

    Yes those 2 things are definitely amongst what bothered her. And also we had 2 arguments in April and May. While the April argument was resolved very well (we ended up having an AMAZING makeup date and were closer than ever), even though the May one was "talked & sorted out", but from her point of view probably left a crack between us, which she later thought was a result of the age gap giving us differing views and values.

    She is shy with people she doesn't know well, but VERY social and close with her group (about 8 friends) and they go out and do stuff alot.

    Having thought about her actions and reactions since the breakup, I finally think I know what state she is in. Basically she still has alot of feelings for me, but because she's not comfortable with the age gap, she is forcing herself to suppress them until they gradually dissipate over time so she can completely get over me and move on. This is evident since she when we text or talk face to face, she tries to put on this demeanour that she's all ok, but when sensitive topics get touched on, she loses control abit and either gets all emotional or physical (excessive touching, hugging etc.).

    I don't know if the state she is in gives me enough to work on, since I'm no PUA and have no idea what I'm doing, but I will have a deep hard think about my game plan and what to do from here on, and also the stuff I should say to her if I contact her.

  2. #12
    MrDiesel is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 77, Level: 1
    Level completed: 54%, Points required for next Level: 23
    Overall activity: 0%
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Brisbane, Australia
    Posts
    16
    Points
    77
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    9

    Default Re: Any chance if she broke up due to age gap

    Ok I was thinking of breaking NC and send her a text last thurs (13/9), then something funny happened.... before I sent my text, she broke first and sent me a text: "hey how u been?". I said hi, been good, how r u etc and "its been a while", and she said "yea its been almost 2 weeks, and about time we caught up with each other " etc.

    So we texted back n forth until she fell asleep, during which she expressed interest in wot I've been up to, I mentioned I've been busy (but didn't give details) and joked around, teased her, and she was warm and playful.

    Continued texting the next day, however I made a BIG mistake here, as I sent her a pic which showed I've got an emoticon in her name which makes it seem like she's still "special". When she saw it,

    she said: "And heeeeey you changed my name : o"
    I said: "Hahaha i' ve got a few others like this, does that make you feel special or unspecial now :P"
    She replied to the rest of my text but not that part... far out was it a bad idea to send that!!

    So the texting continued during the day while both of us were at work (different places), but it started getting stale and colder and I felt bored. I made ANOTHER huge mistake here by continue texting instead of pulling out earlier when she was at the warmest peak!

    Anyway at around 1:30am we were talking about the word 'complicated', which we often used coz I used to tell her I feel complicated when she teased me about another pretty co-worker of ours back last yr before we hooked up.

    Me: "lol complicated! that used to be my word"
    her: "haha I'll borrow it for this time"
    Me: "haha so it defs apply to u right now huh"
    her: "defs does"
    me: "lol ok u can keep it, i don't need that word anymore "
    her: "I'm guessing everything's uncomplicated then"
    me: "yea, well for me it is! I thought it would be for u too lol"
    her: "well ur kinda good at assuming the wrong things"
    me: "thats true.. esp when it comes to u. Haha i thnk we shud stop with this complicated stuff, its too deep haha"
    her: "oh right, yeah thats fine. Shud probs sleep then.. its getting late"
    me: "lol u sound like u stayed up to talk abt it"
    her: "nah i didn't, just dont wana fall asleep on u again"

    OK THIS IS WHERE SHE WENT NUTS
    me: "Hahaha otherwise its gona spill into tmr lol"
    her: "what do u mean spill in to tmr?"
    her: "I'm sorry if the texts were such an inconvenience for u!"
    me: "like leftover bad things we talk abt"
    me: "Hey thats not wot i meant!!!!"
    her: "oh right! well I'll be sure not to spill it in to tmr this time"
    me: "omg u took it all wrong, its not like that"
    her: "i don't think there's any right way to taking it man"

    And the remaining 20 minutes consisted of me panicking and desperately trying to convince her i wasn't trying to say i didn't wana b texting her :/ She started smiling again but admitted she was hurt to hear wot I said at first.

    me: "thk about how I keep wanting to make u laugh, u wont do that for someone unless u like talking to them"
    her: "[my name] I believe you! U made me smile just then "
    .
    .
    me: "u were hurt hearing that stuff earlier werent u"
    her: "yea but its fine"
    me: "why is it fine so quickly?"
    her: "its fine as in i probs deserved it, not in a 'i don't really care' way"
    me: " no u don't deserve it"
    her: ""
    We said our goodnites shortly after and she said "it was good to talk to you "

    I texted her again the day after at nightime to checkup and she was very friendly and nice and asked questions to keep our conversation going. Exchanged abt 4 texts but this time I pulled out around 1am, said goodnight and ended the conversation. After her reply, she tagged on: "ps thanks for checking up ". I haven't texted her since then.

    She's not a girl with high self-confidence / high self esteem, and is often stubborn, you guys reckon I blew her off too much with the "spill into tmr" thing and made her think I completely moved on and don't want to talk to her anymore?

  3. #13
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 15,299, Level: 79
    Level completed: 90%, Points required for next Level: 51
    Overall activity: 99.0%
    Achievements:
    Social10000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    1,032
    Points
    15,299
    Level
    79
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    675

    Default Re: Any chance if she broke up due to age gap

    If she is taking things the wrong way or acting sensitive through your texts she is probably still interested. I wouldn't worry about what you sent her or not ending when you're at a peak in text game. The main thing is getting back to the advice we were giving you before which is to change the dynamic back in your favor. It sounds a bit like you're copying her actions and flow rather than leading.

    If she takes something the wrong way it's her fault - you are not under oath in a court of law, you're chatting with an ex who broke off with you. Why give such a fark? So you still have to decide if you want her back, and if so make the bold brave moves to do so, leave her out of your life or remain in limbo as a 'text buddy' until you both find someone new. I would have asked her to meet in person when she texted you. What is the point of staying up late falling asleep into your phone? With a girl who broke off with you?? You could be falling asleep into each others arms...or another girls.

    If she is not super confident then you should be. As it stands the ball is still in her court even though she texted you because you're being reactionary rather than pro-active and all that behavior is reinforcing why she broke up in the first place. She needs strength which is courage, risk taking and initiative. It's not going to come down to whether you changed her emoticon name or not, it's going to come down to what you both want in the long run and the complication between you two seems like communication and confidence. All women are stubborn. However if she lacks self esteem you need to have an excess of high self esteem otherwise you cannot care or protect her. Go NC again, wait until she contacts you again (she will) and try meet in person asap when that happens. If she starts yapping on about the break up just go 'uh huh whatever' and kiss her. All or nothing. It's not a physics quiz, bring it back to the basics of relationships. Real life fun and passion rather than virtual text discussions. Good luck

  4. #14
    MrDiesel is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 77, Level: 1
    Level completed: 54%, Points required for next Level: 23
    Overall activity: 0%
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Brisbane, Australia
    Posts
    16
    Points
    77
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    9

    Default Re: Any chance if she broke up due to age gap

    whitedragon, thanks again for knocking some sense into me whenever I forget to focus, go off track and over-think things

  5. #15
    MrDiesel is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 77, Level: 1
    Level completed: 54%, Points required for next Level: 23
    Overall activity: 0%
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Brisbane, Australia
    Posts
    16
    Points
    77
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    9

    Default Re: Any chance if she broke up due to age gap

    She had a cultural dance show on last Saturday nite, so I figured I'd send a txt on Fri nite for fun n see what happened. I followed the style and feel of tmalonetn's texting guide and sent something random / creative.

    me: "hola little dancing addict, tomorrow's showtime! Ready to lead ur country's Gangnam Style revolution? "
    her: "hellooo :-) aw u remembered!! (she told me about the show a month ago) sorry abt the late reply, was at rehearsal and only saw it just then! Haha I wish it was Gangnam style :L how you been?"
    her: "so trippy that u txted today, I saw u in my dream last nite " (thurs nite)

    I thght her mentioning she dreamed of me was a good sign, so I inquired abit more the next day... (I won't include non-dream parts of our txt)

    (next morning)
    her: had a good sleep?
    me: yeah, i dreamed u were throwing boxes at me, woke up laughing wbu? (the night before we were talking about a box she bought for work, she asked if I liked it and stuff)
    her: hahahaahahaha omgosh i literally LOL'ed when I read that, thats so funny! Um it was ok but def didn't have any good dreams like the other nite
    me: u mean thurs nites? ur good dreams are rare so tell me abt that dream
    her: Haha yeah the thurs nite one! I will when I see u
    me: ok gota be before you forget it though :L
    her: oh I'm sure I won't forget it for a long while!
    me: ok ur doing a bad job of making me not curious lol! wot kind of dream was it?
    her: Hahahahaha! umm it was a really sweet dream
    me: No preview of the cast at least?
    her: umm it was you, me and some other random ppl!
    me: wow thats a sweet dream award nomination cast :-) oh how you make me suffer with unbearable intrigue..
    her: hahaha lol your gona have to wait and find out! thats IF I don't forget
    me: ok don't forget it or there'll be serious (but fun) consequences when we're close to each other
    her: oh haha serious but fun :L sounds interesting!

    She also noticed all the nicknames I've been coming up with.
    her: Haha ur getting more and more creative with the names
    me: Thank you, making efforts to see you smile more :-)
    her: Aw that's super sweet! (she put a blushing emoticon smile here which she hasn't used since we were still dating)

    So from her mentioning having a real sweet dream of me, I thought it was a big ioi, so I tried to do what whitedragon said and arrange a meeting while the iron seemed hot. But she was going interstate for a short holiday soon after, and even though she had one day free before leaving, i wasn't able to get her to meet up that day, which was disappointing. She's coming back today, so if we talk, will try to arrange something for this week or next.

    You guys think these are good signs so far?

  6. #16
    MrDiesel is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 77, Level: 1
    Level completed: 54%, Points required for next Level: 23
    Overall activity: 0%
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Brisbane, Australia
    Posts
    16
    Points
    77
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    9

    Default Re: Any chance if she broke up due to age gap

    Some positive developments lately... Last fri (5th) was my bday, and on wed night (3rd) she initiated contact and we texted casually throughout thurs. On thurs nite she said she would like to come see me on fri after we both finished work to wish happy bday.

    So she came and we talked inside my car. We hadn't seen each other for 5 weeks. I played it cool, calm, abit cocky and funny, and we had a great time for the first 1hr or so. I can tell she enjoyed it, she had this incredible positive energy and happy vibe to her, when i joked and teased her, she would play with her hair, put her finger in her mouth, turn and look at me with a naughty smile and giggle like a girl being seduced would. She said she can sense I'm much more happier and fun now too.

    Here's where I think I went wrong.... The second hr, I told her abt this theory my friend told me about which opened my mind and gave me a happier attitude. In short, basically I told her that ideally I'd want to be with her, but since she can't be with me right now, instead of mourning and being miserable about it, I've decided to accept it and live life happily, until either she decides to come back to me or I fall inlove with another girl.

    After telling her this, she became quiet and seemed to be in deep thought. I then changed the topic and got her to tell me the sweet dream she had about me a few weeks ago. And she did, it was the best dream ever! She was in a trance when she was recalling it to me!

    Shortly after that, she started Kino'ing the crap out of me. She threw herself at me, grabbed my arm and put it around her and told me "this is how u were hugging me inside the dream", she put my hand ontop of hers and interlocked our fingers, put her head on my lap and let me play with her hair. I told her I've been working out so she started feeling my arm, and when she wanted to roll up my sleeve I said, "uh ah, not yet" and did a playful Takeaway. However, she seemed sad and in deep thought the whole time.

    She lost track of the time, we had spent 3 hrs together and she thought it was only 1.5 hrs. It was getting late so we parted. We texted the next day with more fun happy talk, and I ended it by telling her I had to go to bed, and we haven't talked since.

    The meeting went well overall, the feeling I got is that she is definitely still inlove with me, and the age gap is truly the only barrier she can't get past right now. But I felt like I shot myself in the foot by telling her the theory, coz she now knows where I stand, when its more sexy and mysterious if she didn't know about it. She initiated most of the kino, I didn't even have to do anything, but the air felt a bit weird coz when I asked her why she went so quiet, she said she felt bad for making me miserable after the breakup. She also mumbled stuff like "but ur happy now..." in a complaining tone, but refused to say more.

    I told my friend (the one that invented the theory) and he told me not to worry about having told her the theory, because it indirectly suggests to her I'm getting over her and unless she pulls her finger out and gets her head around it soon, then she's going to to lose me forever.


Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12

Similar Threads

  1. Broke no contact- what to do now
    By Eyesick in forum How To Get Your Ex Back
    Replies: 1
    Last Thread: 08-08-2012, 10:08 PM
  2. Need help met a girl but she just broke up with her bf
    By Velezp in forum Online And Text Game
    Replies: 0
    Last Thread: 07-29-2012, 07:59 PM
  3. broke up after 4 yrs, need some help
    By mustang06 in forum How To Get Your Ex Back
    Replies: 22
    Last Thread: 06-29-2012, 06:25 PM
  4. Broke up with gf... right choice?
    By jabu in forum General Questions
    Replies: 0
    Last Thread: 11-28-2010, 05:34 AM
  5. Just broke up with ex recently
    By El_Draque in forum Online And Text Game
    Replies: 4
    Last Thread: 07-13-2010, 02:02 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
DMCA.com