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Thread: Found ex's pof account, want her back. Please help

  1. #1
    jamesp1229 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Found ex's pof account, want her back. Please help

    Hi guys, sorry to have to ask this but I'm having real difficulties here.

    I just found my ex's plentyoffish account (I don't have one of my own, I was actually searching for her specifically). It's been 13 months since we've broken up, and haven't spoken for 6. Our relationship didn't end badly but she did cheat on me with her past ex after I got jealous of him and she broke it off with me. I know she doesn't want him, and I realize now that I could have been more mature, it was my fault she cheated. I'd really like to be friends with her again and possibly date her once more. Edit: I should add that we rebounded once after 4 months, which only lasted about a month, if that makes a difference. Thank you.

    Thanks for any advice guys, I'm really stuck on this one.

  2. #2
    The Red Baron's Avatar
    The Red Baron is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Found ex's pof account, want her back. Please help

    I know this isn't the advice you want, but ultimately - you don't want her back.

    It's one-itis. Even a year later. Have you been dating any other girls meanwhile? Are you currently dating anyone?

    If you're not out there meeting girls, its easy to look back on your last relationship and wonder what you gave up. Its called one-itis.

    My honest advice is to go meet new people. The relationship ended for a reason, you'll meet someone else who works so much better but you gotta put yourself out there.

    You should be asking "how do I meet new girls" instead of how do i get her back.
    Never need praise, sympathy, or approval



  3. #3
    Tyrone1991's Avatar
    Tyrone1991 is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Found ex's pof account, want her back. Please help

    If you havent spoke to her in 6 months how do you know you want her?
    Men, we need to value our time more then we value women. This isn't to say women are not valuable. But who are we to believe in something so illogical, as men we should realize that without our time(life), we would not even be able to pursue women, but only our mother who gave us life. Why do we think we should prioritize them over our time(life) unless she is the one who gives me/my children life. Man is Sovereignty.

  4. #4
    jamesp1229 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Found ex's pof account, want her back. Please help

    Yes I realize it is oneitis, I've posted on here before and the only advice I received was "wait until she texts you". And in fact I surprised she would resort to online dating instead of at least trying.

    I have been with 6 women in the mean time and none of them have given me the satisfaction that this girl has. They were almost all hotter as well.

    You could be right though, there are so many beautiful women at my university and I'm still clueless with approaches, I would never dare to start a conversation with someone random. I was all right for a while but since I haven't been with a woman in about 4-5 months, I've fallen into some state of depression that makes me walk away from any opportunity

  5. #5
    Tyrone1991's Avatar
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    Default Re: Found ex's pof account, want her back. Please help

    i think before you focus on picking up, you should try just have some fun first, do something for yourself. and then do it. i actually get more confident just approaching for the reason i did it no matter the outcome, i get very proud of myself for just doing it. you know why? because so many guys are to scared to do it. so thats a good way of thinking about approaching
    Men, we need to value our time more then we value women. This isn't to say women are not valuable. But who are we to believe in something so illogical, as men we should realize that without our time(life), we would not even be able to pursue women, but only our mother who gave us life. Why do we think we should prioritize them over our time(life) unless she is the one who gives me/my children life. Man is Sovereignty.

  6. #6
    jamesp1229 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Found ex's pof account, want her back. Please help

    Well I think I will start doing that more, and being more involved with the other portions of this site. Could anyone give me advice on my current dilemma though? DO you think it is possible to get her back? I will not focus all my energy on this, but just as a sort of side mission that I would like to see work but will not be disappointed if it doesn't.

  7. #7
    Tyrone1991's Avatar
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    Default Re: Found ex's pof account, want her back. Please help

    if you can be the guy she was once attracted to and somehow show that those other bad qualitys are gone, possibly use some specialised gaming techniques like, push n pull, mystery and triangle theory yes i know you can get her back. but once you learn the techniques man, you wont want her back because you have atlest 4 or 5 giirls chasing you at one time.
    Men, we need to value our time more then we value women. This isn't to say women are not valuable. But who are we to believe in something so illogical, as men we should realize that without our time(life), we would not even be able to pursue women, but only our mother who gave us life. Why do we think we should prioritize them over our time(life) unless she is the one who gives me/my children life. Man is Sovereignty.

  8. #8
    jamesp1229 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Found ex's pof account, want her back. Please help

    I just have to be myself with her, I don't need any techniques to keep her attracted to me. I know what I messed up in our relationship and in the past 5 months I've improved myself so much. All I need is help on how to start the interaction. I'm afraid if I message her first it will come across as desperate, but I see no other possible way.

  9. #9
    The Red Baron's Avatar
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    Default Re: Found ex's pof account, want her back. Please help

    Yes you can get her back but it's a delicate balance

    And the real clincher is that you need to be confident and less affected by everything, which comes with confidence from having other options

    If you approach now and stay down and needy its really hard to mask that. Get over that hurdle first and be alpha when you talk to her

    Glad you're aware of the situation anyway, best of luck
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  10. #10
    Konstantin is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Found ex's pof account, want her back. Please help

    Quote Originally Posted by jamesp1229 View Post
    Hi guys, sorry to have to ask this but I'm having real difficulties here.

    I just found my ex's plentyoffish account (I don't have one of my own, I was actually searching for her specifically). It's been 13 months since we've broken up, and haven't spoken for 6. Our relationship didn't end badly but she did cheat on me with her past ex after I got jealous of him and she broke it off with me. I know she doesn't want him, and I realize now that I could have been more mature, it was my fault she cheated. I'd really like to be friends with her again and possibly date her once more. Edit: I should add that we rebounded once after 4 months, which only lasted about a month, if that makes a difference. Thank you.

    Thanks for any advice guys, I'm really stuck on this one.
    Don't mean to be an ass but once a cheater, always a cheater. I caught my ex and her old ex together making out and I was so mad that I beat the living shit outta him...she begged and begged for me to take her back but all I could picture was them together and how shitty she made me feel so I would never take her back


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