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Thread: What to do now - how do I get her back?

  1. #21
    baltazar is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: What to do now - how do I get her back?

    i agree, move on! You gave her chance to show you if she still loves you. I know it is hard, i been there but i moved on and start dating another girls. Just stop thinking so much about her. Every time you start thinking about her you need to change your thoughts about something else, that helps

  2. #22
    jackerson is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: What to do now - how do I get her back?

    yes, total NC and concentrating on yourself. your well-being, your workout, your social life, your dates in this period of 4-6 weeks is vital. vital for getting your alpha male frame back. Then, u can decide what you want to do.

    right now, have you acknowledge/found out what went wrong, or what you did to make her leave? if not, send her a email acknowledging what you did or how you made her feel.
    DO it in a dignified way and don't sound like a wuss. Never apologize for how you FEEL.

    AND THEN, COMPLETELY erase her from your network/mind for 4-6 weeks. FOR REAL, u have to get her off your mind. u can change your facebook settings so that she doesn't show up on ur feed. write down her contacts/address in a piece of paper and stash it away and delete them from your phone. this will prevent you from the urge to suddenly text "how are you..? /// i miss you // etc". This period is to FOCUS on you, to become a better person and getting your calm/cool head back. It also grants her emotional space and time to think and to miss you.

    4-6 weeks later, you might have made a couple more HB friends and then it is up to you to decide if she is worth chasing anymore. if she contact you during this period, play pull-push with her.

  3. #23
    BlazerFan is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: What to do now - how do I get her back?

    I've been in NC with her for about 2 weeks. The only communication was a short message about getting the cable bill in my name and then her coming to get the money. I did see her briefly for about 5 seconds. Outside of that I haven't made any contact with her. She did send me this email out of the blue a few days ago

    I hope things are going well for you and I'm glad you found a reason to stay. I'm sorry I had to be so abrupt about things but I don't handle stress well, as you already know.
    I'm sad things didn't work out for us, but I am glad our paths crossed for a short while.

    I'll remember you fondly,


    I didn't reply but should I use the Push Pull and send her a response back. (agreeing with the break up, push pull etc.. ?) That would be the only contact I would make. I could use it to my advantage and then not contact her for 4-6 weeks...

  4. #24
    BlazerFan is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: What to do now - how do I get her back?

    Hey guys. I'm back after well over a month of NC. She texted me last week asking if I had any of her mail. I simply replied No i haven't seen anything. Last night I decided it was time for me to give her a call. I had joined one of those "get ur ex back" programs. I followed all of it and have made some really good improvements and learned alot about what happened and where I went wrong and basically how the gender roles got reversed. It was really frustrating for me to realize these things and when they happened. I wanted to go back in time and just change my behavior. I have been dating and doing alot of socializing. I have lost about 15 pounds and am putting on muscle too. Im doing it all and I still feel like I do want her back... So anyways I called last night and it went to voice mail.

    This morning I get a text: "was there an emergency"

    WTF how do I respond to that? I havent replied or called again. Can anyone help me out here? I would really appreciate it.

  5. #25
    Shortman is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: What to do now - how do I get her back?

    What did you say in the voicemail?


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