Re: Need help husband of 17 years left for someone else please read!
Limited contact in your situation would be the only way that you could somewhat effectively freeze him out. Tell him you think it's best if you two didn't speak about anything other than the kids for now. This will give him time to miss you.
Then, do all of the things I mentioned before. You don't have to date if you don't want to but you can at least get out of the house and be a little mysterious as to exactly where you're at and what you're doing. I will tell you though that the quickest way to correct his behavior would be to date another man. Well, at least get out of the house!
Tell him you need him to watch the kids on a planned day because you're going out with a "friend". If he tries to ask you just who your going out with remind him that this is what he wanted and it's none of his business now who you see. Correct him when he tries to break lc. Basically just play hard to get... I'm sure this won't be difficult for you to do.
The only problem with all of this is that it is emotionally exhausting and it delays healing time. You'll feel like you have one foot in the door and one out of it. But, I understand that marriage is much more serious than your average relationship--serious enough to fight for. Remember though to take care of yourself. Get some "you" time in.
“The great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement; you ought not to be thinking of whether it ends in victory or defeat. Let nature take its course, and your tools will strike at the right moment.” -Bruce Lee