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Thread: Been NC for two months, what now?

  1. #1
    Muldoon is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Been NC for two months, what now?

    I've been reading a ton of PUA material including these threads while not contacting my ex for two months now, absolutely no communication. Not a text, telegraph, smoke signal, nothing. Our last communication was a dramatic text(from her) followed by phone conversation about her telling me she never wants to see me again EVER and she is moving to New York(insert drama). I just stayed calm and said I'll always remember you. Her not contacting me at all tells me that she is for sure seeing someone else and I was super jealous when I first realized this. Now I just don't care.

    It seems the recurring theme is that you should get in touch with your ex after you get over her. I can honestly say that I am over her now. I looked at her FB profile and she is still single but looks like she is having lots of fun. I felt totally detached. More importantly, I've started going to school again with a subject I am totally passionate about and I feel like I have found a number 1 priority in my life, a purpose to which all women are now secondary.

    I think she won't contact me unless she gets dumped by this new guy because she has transferred all of her emotional support from me to him.

    How would I even contact her without it looking like I want her back?

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Been NC for two months, what now?

    If all that you said is true, why write this post?

    It seems the recurring theme is that you should get in touch with your ex after you get over her.

    Or is this^ the main reason?
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  3. #3
    Muldoon is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Been NC for two months, what now?

    Well obviously, I want her back in my life.

    The main reason I'm posting is that there are experienced people on this website who have been in my shoes and I would sincerely appreciate their input. I thought that was rather obvious though.

  4. #4
    ridemyr1 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Been NC for two months, what now?

    Google Kill Beatrice.

    Move on dude. Rough? Yes but it must be done.

    20 characters.
    To my bros who served with me.
    "When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home.

  5. #5
    Muldoon is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Been NC for two months, what now?

    Ok, thanks. If she contacts me, I'll post on here again.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Been NC for two months, what now?

    Well obviously, I want her back in my life.

    I'm sorry, I guess I just didn't find it to be that obvious.


    Our last communication was a dramatic text(from her) followed by phone conversation about her telling me she never wants to see me again EVER.

    Okay, so she wants nothing to do with you.


    I was super jealous when I first realized this. Now I just don't care.

    I can honestly say that I am over her now.

    I felt totally detached. More importantly, I've started going to school again with a subject I am totally passionate about and I feel like I have found a number 1 priority in my life, a purpose to which all women are now secondary.

    See what I mean? If the aforementioned were true then you wouldn't have posted this. If you just didn't care; if you felt totally detached; if you did have a passion stronger than that for women then you would be over her. Your statements and actions are self-conflicting. NC is just as much a method for your own personal growth as it is for hers. The intent of NC as it applies is to reflect, make changes to yourself, and grow. Were you doing those, or were you focusing solely on maintaining NC? Because two months is a long time and if done correctly should have worked.


    The main reason I'm posting is that there are experienced people on this website who have been in my shoes and I would sincerely appreciate their input.

    It sounds like you need to make a conscious decision to be over it. You've already done most of the work. Go out, meet some new women, and enjoy your life.
    Wondering where I am now? Check out my latest project:


  7. #7
    Muldoon is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Been NC for two months, what now?

    You're mistaken, I am over her. There are no conflicting actions, hence me not contacting her. It's fine, I won't initiate anything and if she does contact me I'll just decide then what I want to do. Thanks for your advice and time.

  8. #8
    Hotel Yorba is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Been NC for two months, what now?

    You have to understand that above all, we are trying to help you. You've made so much progress so far. Why risk going back to square 1? If you came back now she could see you the new you and become attracted again...but how long until things go back to the same routine? Or worse: What if you contacted her and she wants nothing to do with you still?

    It's a high risk / low reward situation. She is the ultimate prize, the reason you did all of this, the reason you're posting on this forum.

    You've done your research so now you have the tools to get a new girl(s)! It's way easier (and more fun) to start a new relationship than it is trying to salvage an old one.

  9. #9
    Hotel Yorba is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Been NC for two months, what now?

    You have to understand that above all, we are trying to help you. You've made so much progress so far. Why risk going back to square 1? If you came back now she could see you the new you and become attracted again...but how long until things go back to the same routine? Or worse: What if you contacted her and she wants nothing to do with you still?

    It's a high risk / low reward situation. She is the ultimate prize, the reason you did all of this, the reason you're posting on this forum.

    You've done your research so now you have the tools to get a new girl(s)! It's way easier (and more fun) to start a new relationship than it is trying to salvage an old one.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Been NC for two months, what now?

    Cody and Yorba are right! It's time to lightin up move on and have some fun. if you contact your ex you will go back to the same old grind after a few weeks and possibly face another breakup. The perception she is giving by posting on facebook seems to be one of having fun but it may not be true. Peoples perception of things and situations may not always be what is actually happening, and this could be what she wants you to think. My suggestion let it go date other women preferably more than one, and let the good times roll!


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