Let me tell you my story. It's been a rough time and I now I feel kinda lost and need some help making a plan.
I started dating that girl about 2 years ago. The relationship started great, although it was hard at the start because she still felt hurt from another relationship, but we worked it out. A few months later, I was diagnoses with a severe disease and I was told it could even kill me. I felt scared and horrible at the beginning and I messed up because I didn't tell anything to her in like 2-3 months where my self-esteem was as lowest as possible. I finally told her but things weren't like they were in the beginning.
From there, she tried to break up with me after another 2 months because she said she didn't feel anything for me anymore, but we patched that up. It wasn't the best decision, but I needed that emotional support in that moment. From that point, she was extremely distant to me, although she cared about my health. I was constantly pursuing her and messed it even more.
About 3 months ago, she didn't even want to hang out with me, so 2 months ago I got fed up and told her I couldn't bear that anymore. A few days later, we talked a lot on the phone and ended both of us crying, with she telling me she wanted me as a friend, and that she could be with anyone at that moment. After that, we stopped talking although I was still kind of pursuing her and trying to talk to her. Then, 2 weeks later, I had to move for a few days for some special treatment that could kill me or end with my disease, so I called her and told her, and then she tried to cheer me up. She even texted me when I was about to enter the hospital. Fortunately, it went great and now I'm fully recovered, but even then I've tried to contact her a few times since that day.
I finally met her last wednesday because we both had to go to the same conference, but I was thinking I should talk to her again (just meet her), but I felt like she tried to avoid me all the time, giving me her back on the other end of the room. I tried to play it nice talking with some of my friends there and waiting for us to meet casually to say hi, but she kept like that all the time.
So, after that day, I started reading some books and that same day I started with "No contact". What I'm worried about is that the whole situation feels different from what I can see in any books, so I don't know how I should act. Right now, I'm just keeping with no contact while improving myself (but I started doing that before starting NC, so I don't know if I did right). ¿Any ideas of what I should do?
Also, I must note that next saturday I'll have to see her in a birthday, which is probably going to be a long party. ¿What should I do there?
Thanks for reading the whole story. If anyone's worried, I must say that now I'm doing great in health terms and I started exercising again to recover physically. I'm also trying to look form more thing to do to improve myself and recover my lost confidence, because I know that my whole self changed the day I heard the bad news, and I let it go all over my head.