Sorry for the long post but it has to be said.
Ok so I moved to Dallas, TX just under 2 years now. Without knowing a soul in this town so I had a fresh start on my life after college.
Last august 2012 I met two girls at my pool thats right in front of my apartment, Brittany and Merideth(24 years old). Both are my neighbors (about a block away) and they are roommates. They were super cool. I ended up getter their numbers.
I was more attracted, at the time, to Brittany she is a 8 but Merideth isn't bad herself shes a 7.5. At the time Brittany was going off on a month long family vacation. So I texted Merideth to hang out. We hit it off from the get go. Just spent a lot of time at each others apartments. Even hooked up the 3rd time we were "watching" a movie. We clicked so fast and so easily. Texting each other every day just enjoy one another's company. Brittany has a BF now.
About two weeks later I had to go back home to Wisconsin for a wedding. She was sad because she wanted to spend more time with me. But we continued to text while i was gone. I came back about 2 weeks later and she was so excited to see me again. Her roommate Brittany was still gone from her vacation. We did everything together: went on dates, state fair, six flags and movies. We kissed a lot and had more sex. Shortly after I started to meet her family and friends.
After seeing and talking to one another regularly for a few months. It was in the middle of October that we driving back from playing mini golf. She had mentioned something about her talking to a guy but I knew she was just giving me the shit test. I asked her, "Are you going to go on a date with him?". She replayed with "I don't want to see anyone else, I wanna be with you". I was pretty surprised with that response. This is where I regret my actions because I said the worse thing anyone say in response to that statement. I said, "Thanks". I am so disappointed in myself for not giving her more then that. There were several other times, over the course of a few months that she would she asked me "what are we?". I usually responded with something lame like "why does there have to be a label" or "we're friends!". Even her friends would ask us if we were dating. Her response would usually to look at me and say "Ask him".
The reason I didn't commit was because I was scared from previous relationships and so was she and I didn't want to hurt either one of us. But I never expressed that to her. I was just passive about that situation.
She invited me to her families for both Thanksgiving and Christmas parties. Everyone including her acted like we were together. Now it was christmas time. I went back home again for 2 weeks to spend the time with family. Before I left Merideth and I exchanged gifts and bodily fluids and shortly after I went on my way. We text a bunch the whole time I was gone. She told me she had plans for us when I got back for New Year's Eve. She wanted me to hurry up and get home as fast as possible. At this point she told me I was her best friend and she really liked me.
When I got home from my vacation she was to excited to see me. We went out on New Years as a couple for dinner then met up with some of her friends. She got really drunk and we have some funny stories we like to joke about from time to time.
I knew then I should have made a move but I didn't. I never really verbally said anything about how I felt about her but my actions were there. We continued to go on dates. We even did a half marathon together. He made goal was to lost some weight and I offered to help her. She did the insanity workouts and man I have to tell you. Get your girl to do insanity. That stuff works. He was much tighter then usual its pretty amazing.
Anyway back to my story. In the course of the 10 months that we were best of friends she had stayed over at my place an average of 3-4 times a week even though we were neighbors. I stayed at her place a bunch too.
We were still going to dates, birthday parties and dinners. It didn't seem like this could get any better. I also got to know her friends and family real well over the course of this time.
So, I finally this past may I decided to and was prepared to make full commitment to her. I kept telling myself in the back of my head that this shouldn't be a problem because he we have always flirted and acted around each other the same way and nothing should change. Only thing that will change is the title. I had revved myself up for the last couple months to this point so I was really. I wanted to ask her in person but I had noticed the last few days that she was actually a little differently towards me. Normally she would call or text me about her day or ask me what my plans were for the week because she then would make plans.
I may have made the wrong move but I ended up telling her and she was still being short with me. So I asked if everything was ok between us She is also a nurse and she was transferring over from working nights to working days so I thought that had something to do with it. She had never shown a bad sign before. She responded with "Its just that I don't know where we stand and I don't want either one of us to get hurt". I was really surprised by that response so I called her. I told her how over the course of the last few months I developed strong feelings for her and since she already expressed her interest in me I thought we were all good. She then started crying her eyes out and said "where was this 6 months ago?". I told her I wanted to but I was just scared to get hurt.
She then told me that should couldn't commit to me. Right before this conversation we agreed to have dinner together the following day. Well after we had talked on the phone for a good hour and me trying to convince her to change her mind she had to get to bed as she had to work early in the morning. I asked her if she was still ok with dinner the next day and she said "I don't know".
The next day after little to no sleep I got a text from her that evening that said she wouldn't make the dinner because she had to think about the situation. That following day she text me and told me she was ready to talk face to face. We met at a bar with very little people there so we could talk. We sat outside and talked about where we both stood. She said that being exclusive was off the table but she isn't going anywhere. She had used every excuse in the book just short of "Its not me its you", that one was not used. "She would say stuff like, "It's bad timing" and "I'm just to busy". I know that was her blowing me off but I refused to accept because she didn't sound convincing. Again she was crying about 75% of our conversation. So I felt like that was mixed signals. She had set some bounties like I wasn't able to tickle her anymore and we couldn't alone one on one anymore. So only in public places or with friends. She said she wasn't trying to play games or anything that she just wanted to be friends and we couldn't be physical anymore.
The next couple of days we had texted back and forth only a few times but then that friday she text me early that morning to ask me if I wanted to go to a movie. Like a chump I said yes. I was really excited and bought some new close and I thought "Wow! maybe she changed her mind!". The date (that what she called it) went really well. But I was a little confused because once we got into the theatre she wanted to cuddle up next to me and hold hands. I was really confused and was really nervous. I didn't know what moves to make because she had set those boundaries. After the movie we held hands all the way to the car and on the drive home. I was hoping at this point for a positive conversation but nothing happened. I got a peck on the cheek and she said thank you and goodnight.
That next day I made another chump move. I was really excited after that date and thought well maybe things had turned around. I knew she had to work that next day so I decided to send her flowers at her work. I thought well maybe she will accept this after the night we had. To my surprise I got a thank you text. Now a normal way she talked to me. She was normally very excited and would describe them and talk about how she was so thankful for them, but she wasn't.
Over the course of the next few weeks we had text each other every day but she started to become distant. I tried to make her make some moves hoping she was invite me to things like she use to and tell me how her day ways. But she didn't. She started to become cold yet still would talk to me.
My birthday was coming up and she text me the night before and asked if I wanted to come over to pick up my present. Again, I was kinda excited because she was breaking another one of her rules so I figured maybe she changed her mind again. We ended up talking about her day and how she was tired from a long day of work. She ended up falling asleep on my lap on her couch. And of course I tried to milk that as much as I could.
The next day on my birthday she had apologized for her actions from the night before. Saying she didn't way to lead me on any further and it was her bad. I ended up having happy hour with only her because it was my birthday. She was all about it. Durning the time we were eating we started to hash a few things out again. And I'm pretty sure I pushed her away a little, if the flowers already hadn't.
Over the course of the next few weeks after that we started becoming even more distant. Talking about once every 3 or so days. I managed to arrange to set up two "dates" with her to go to a baseball game. She loves baseball so she was excited and was all about it. She also invited me to her Memorial Day party with a bunch of her friends but was kinda distant but if I were to walk past her should would touch me.
At this point my main goal was to act like we never had the commitment conversations and go back to the way things use to be. Using a lot of keno and trying to stay out of that damn "friends zone". The first game we went to I made it a point to hold her and she seem slightly uncomfortable but never said anything. The night ended with a kiss on the cheek.
The next game we went to I made it a point to do light keno and wanted to see if she would make any moves and if any moves I made see if she was reciprocate. I got very little aside from some back and forth flirting. She then suggested we go have dinner and she seemed to want to hang out a little longer. That was the last time we saw each other face to face. BTW neither time we went to the games did she dress up or wear makeup and I do understand thats a sign of disinterest.
From then on I made it a point that I wanted her to make the moves. Nothing happened. I actually saw her at the pool where I met her and she was very cold. She had met a guy and was/is talking to him. So she seemed nervous that I was there. She continued to say she wanted to stay friends with me but since she kept being cold. I told that we need to stop talking to each for a while with respect to one another. Its been 2 weeks with NC and almost a month since I last saw her face to face. I also deleted her from Facebook because I didn't have enough self control to stop looking at her page.
I have also noticed that this guy who lives 2 doors down from me coming out of her apartment a few times ( I have to drive past her apt to get in and out of mine). A mutual friend also told me that this guy posted a pick of her on his Facebook at the same mini golf place. With just her but it was her posing.
I know y'all are gonna say just walk away from this girl and go find someone else. But it is real difficult with the proximity in which we live plus the fact that we were so great of friends.
I just wanna know if anyone else has had this experience before? Do I have any ligament chance of getting her back with the NC Rule? Since I established the NC Rule do you think she'll ever make the first move to contacting me ever again? Do you think that her youth(she's 24 I'm 29) and lack of experience is why she's scarred to commit?
Thanks for reading