I might be new in the Forums, but I've been in the PUA scene for a while now...Almost Five years, so I know (or Knew) a thing or two.
Anyway, the reason I'm here, is the same reason why every other pathetic looser come to this dark session of the Forums.
And that is, getting my Ex Back!
I'm not going to say my story is different from the others, cause it's Always the same. But i does have its share of peculiarities.
As Always, she ditched me, for the lame looser i've became. When we met I was outgoing, funny, smartass, sexy...All these kind of things we learn to become, and, I was on the Top of my game.
During the relationship, which lasted for a year and a half, something like that, everything was perfect, blissfull, she loved me for everything, texted me, said she wanted to marry me, that I was the love of her life. All those things that become a very hard emotional toll to remember today.
By the end I was sensing that she was different, distant, and I tried to ask her what was going on, but by that time she already made up her mind, and eventually she droped the "I need some time".
This was May 26th
It caught me out off guard, and since I've became a sorry looser, in June I ran back to her like the little bitch I was (am?)
The weeks that followed she treated me like trash, said things just to hurt me, ignored me, my phone calls, sms, avoided me, refused sex 2 or 3 times, and she did it all with such maestry, that I looked like the villain to all her friends and familly. Women...The másters of deceiving!
Anyway, eventually I got her cellphone, and found that she was cheating on me with this one guy from her college, for this whole month we were "back" together. Low. But my guts tell me that this sh1t was happening for sometime before the breakup.
And of course it was happening, I've became a fat complaining film watcher popcorn eater no emotions whatsoever boyfriend. And she, she is a staggering woman in her early 20's, craving for emotion.
I was not giving her any, so she went to find somewhere else.
For that I don't blame her, au contrair, I thank her, for opening my eyes for the sh1t I've became.
So, she cheated, I've ranted, she was emotionless with the rant, because by that time, she couldnt care less, anyway, I said loads of sh1t to her, thanked her for nothing, said that this sh1t was going to hurt eternally on me, she cried, and I've left. The only time she cried. EVER!
I've entered no contact the day, 8th of July, but I was desperate the following weeks. I'm kind of desperate now, imagine back then.
So I've came across Relationship rewind, and after Reading it over and over again, I' ve reaproched her, in a very light sense, said something nice, said that I've supported her life decisions. Tried to look like the bigger man. She was astonished. She thanked me, she was speechless. It did work. This was July 30th
The next day Ive said nothing, and 1st of August Ive said something or two leading to the so called false friendship, she was a bit uneasy, but it also worked out by the end of the day, and she was like super happy, telling me I was super nice and stuff, and then came the breakup talk, which I wasnt prepared, so I called her.
We spoke for about 40 min, I said I was doing ok, she was happy, I've said some wadawada, then I proceeded to excuse my self, told her I was sorry, that now I understood her motives whatsoever, said I forgave her as well, she said she was sorry. It was beautifull, we arranged a coffee day for the next tuesday, said goodbye.
The first miss, I tried to reach her the next day, but she was a little bit uneasy, and I was clearly needy. By the end, I said I was busy, wished her a good weekend, and things went better than expected.
I was supposed to talk to her again only the next tuesday, but due some dumb advice from a friend, I called her the next day, saturday, and that was one of the stupidest things ever. It was AWKWARD!!
She said, we see each other tuesday.
Tuesday came, I called, she was completelly away, said she was busy, couldnt do it, and for us to reeschedule it. I said ok, and left as the bigger man, said she got my number, when she wanted to do, she could call me and I see if I can make it.
I was pissed off, wrote a poem (very beautiful btw), and the next day I hit the nearby college to close some girls, got 2 of them. It was a good night and I was feeling good with my self.
Until Thursday, which now, is the day that take off my sleep.
She texted me, some random sh1t, a Picture of my mother that she had on her cell, for me to send to my mom. Out of the Blue.
She was reaching out.
But instead of being alpha and saying thx, i'll send it, I did that, and tried to roll some convo. Terrible mistake. Any spark created was washed down by my neediness, and by the end of the convo, she didn't replied the last message, which was about mashed potatoes, believe it or not. I used the busy card, said It was good speaking to her, talk to you later, kisses goodbye.
She replied, 2 hours later saying, "good talking to you too. kisses".
Which here in Brazil, means, ok, now fark off looser!
I've shuned her. Wasted a perfect oportunity to remain cool. Now I don't know when, and If, will this happen again.
That is because her "best friend" from the college is now on the scene, he left last year as a fat caring friend, and now he is back, as a farking hot, and still caring friend. And he also looks very similar to me!
So now he is back, and of course he wants her, I do actually believe he read some sh1t about getting out of the friendzone, cause he played by the book.
And now he is using every opportunity to be with her, taking her out, on road trips (with a plus one fat friend of them) taking her to fancy dinners. All the crap.
And of course she is liking it, cause by the end of our relationship, none of this happened. I'm pretty sure she is using him as rebound to forget me, and he is playing his part very well, not letting her miss me at all.
Now I'm here, today. My friends made an intervession to me. Told me to move on. Told me to go NO CONTACT, and leave it to chance.
I absolutelly agree with the NC, but I don't think she is ever triying to reach me again, since I "set her free" when I said I was ok with everything, proposed a friendship, and then acted like a boy!
Bottomline, what the F should I do??
I know there isn't much I can do, besides living my life, posting pics on facebook, dating other girls and stuff... And wait!
And I know she is a worthless cheater, but they all are, I know, they are emotional and stuff. But she is the one I want.
I had many before her, but none ever made me feel this way.
Sorry for the long post, I've tried to keep it minimal.
And sorry for bad english, not my mother tongue!
PS: I later found out that after I've send the Picture to my mother, my mother called her, and spoke to her for half an hour, in which she told my mom it didn't work out beacuse we both made mistakes, but that she still loves me. And other girl stuff my mother didn't told me.
Women... Not to be trusted!