Hey all... my first time posting here.
My story is, I was stuck dating 5's and 6's and after reading a lot of PUA advice now succeeding with many 10's !! There is however this one woman I consider a solid 12! Incredibly beautiful, Intelligent and completely amazing in every single way. We connect so well on so many levels, sexually, mentally, emotionally, even with business (we are both business owners) life outlook and future ambitions.
We dated for about 3 months, but as I was new to dating at the time I made a few small errors and lacked conviction and belief in myself I deserved a 12 out of 10 girlfriend. We talked about marriage, children, future ...etc. but I think I may have pushed all of it a bit hard too soon, along with some other errors of not always opening doors for her or always paying for dinners (made her pay for some) ..being European and quite high and mighty in her perception of self, she ended up breaking up with me.
I tried a mild attempt at repair, but thought it best to let it go. I didn't want to seem like I was chasing her, or grovelling for her to take me back so just left it alone and got on with my life. Trouble is I still think about her all the time. I know she's "the one" there's no other woman like her or one that I connect so well with. I sms'd and txt'd her from time to time, like Christmas or just randomly to say I was thinking about her. She got a new boyfriend soon after we broke up and has been dating him ever since, about a year now.
Trouble is, about 3 months after I last txt'd/contacted her, she started contacting me out of the blue. Asking how I am and asking if I can help set up her new business. We chatted and talked on the phone more frequently, but I made sure not to let on that I was still massively in lust/love (I'm not sure which) with her. I didn't contact her too often nor smother her. I remained challenging and aloof about my thoughts and feelings for her and told her I have other women in my life.
Over the course of the next 6 months we organised some events and things for us to catch up. We met about 5 times progressively got her from public meet-ups to having dinner at my place a couple of times. We discussed quite a few things, what has been happening in our lives and what we are looking for in future..etc. I set on rebuilding attraction and seduction, escalating progressively but slowly enough not to scare her off. We've hugged and kissed and had a bit of a tickle, but not gone as far as sex.
After that I didn't contact her. I felt I created enough attraction for her to chase me a little bit. She contacted me about a week and a half later and asked "if I have any plans Saturday night" .. I said, "Hmm, maybe, what have you in mind" .. we organised a day at the beach, little bit of a picnic, that sort of thing. We spoke about watching a movie together over at my place after. I asked her to prepare the picnic stuff (as I've been organising everything else the past 5 months) and maybe this spooked her (reality check of "planning").
I get the feeling she definitely knew if we went ahead with the "date" we would end up having sex, it was almost "understood"
Trouble is she got cold feet. She txt'd she was feeling guilty about her current boyfriend and didn't want to cheat on him with me and said she wanted to figure out what to do with him first. I know not to cut her current BF down or make comments that seemed like I thought badly of him, so I just said "ok" ... and that was it.
She then txt'd back saying "well what do you think, wouldn't you do the same"
I txt'd ... you already know I think you're the most amazing woman I've ever met, we connect so well, if we are together again I have no trouble letting go of the girls I am currently seeing, I'm just waiting for you to be ready"
(BTW: I've already told her many times and she definitely knows I think she's the one for me and the most amazing woman I've met that I connect so well with. I think she somewhat feels the same about me but maybe to a lesser degree. I know I probably shouldn't have told her how I feel, but sometimes when you're in the moment you can't help but tell them how wonderful and special you think they are. I honestly believe my genuine apprecation of her without holding back my feelings is what makes her feel so special and why she keeps coming back for more)
Then she txt'd back
"Well tell me when you meet someone special so I can stop thinking about you"
I then just called her on the phone and spoke in depth about what was happening. Basically she says she has all these feelings for me and thinks I'm kind of the guy for her too. But she's in a relationship with this guy who is not all of what she wants, but an ok guy none the less and doesn't want to hurt his feelings by cheating on him and getting with me"
So I just said, well we'll just let it be and see what happens.
My Question now is
WHAT SHOULD I DO NOW ??
It's so frustrating not being able to speed this up.
Should I keep contacting her or just go absent and wait for her to be ready and contact me again ??
She really is "the one" woman for me and the only one I have such intense feelings for.