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  1. #1
    BuahahaXD is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Accept the invitation from my ex?

    Hi,

    I have a problem with my ex. I will call her Alice. She dumped me (after 3,5 years) almost 3 months ago. I was needy and desperate and made almost all the possible mistakes. Alice started meeting another guy 3 days after leaving me and she still is in this relationship. After a breakup we still lived together for around 1 month. We were getting along pretty well, we were talking about university and other neutral subjects. Sometimes I talked to her about the breakup and my feelings for her but I was pushy, needy and desperate and this turned her off completely. She didnít tell me about the new guy. She was telling me that maybe she should go on a date with somebody else and see if she still loves me. I told her I donít want this but if she thinks she really needs that, maybe she should do it. I told her that if she goes on a date she mustnít tell me and she has to hide it from me. She didnít. A few days later she came with him to our room, left her handbag and they left. I had to go somewhere and returned 30 minutes later. She was in our room with thus guy and she was resting her head on his shoulder. They didnít hear me coming. After that they left and later she told me on the phone that she made the final decision (about us), that she did what I wanted her to do (meeting smb else, I told her a few times that I didnít want her to do that and if she does she should do it without me knowing). I thought that it was her first meeting with this guy but it wasnít, they have been dating for around 2 weeks. I found out about it later, reading her facebook messages. I confessed to this right after she came back home. At first she was pissed but later she didnít care.

    Before new yearís I cut off all contact. I was working on myself and got some results. A month later me and my ex met on a party held by our mutual friend. At first she didnít even look at me, she was having fun with others. She went out smoking cigarettes (she never liked smoking and she knew I hated it). I talked to her a bit about some neutral subjects and after that she became a bit more friendly. However she still was quite mean and angry towards me from time to time. When I told I liked the song that was on, she would change it. When I started telling a story to her and 2 other people, she and her friend Jenny left the room. The funny thing is that Jenny dumped his boyfriend (after 5 years) very soon after talking to Alice about our breakup. Alice and Jenny now live in the same flat, they party a lot and show to everyone how happy they are.

    A few days after the party at our friendís place Alice and Jenny invited me to a costume party at Aliceís place. Jennyís ex was also invited. 15 people were invited. Alice is coming with her new boyfriend. I donít know if I should accept this invitation. I donít know how to behave with her boyfriend around. Another thing I think of is initiating a meeting with her. A month without any contact passed and I made some improvements. I think if I invite her out or start texting she will very likely ignore it (she has a boyfriend and Jenny will help Alice forget about me). The costume party she invited me to will take place on 22 February. The no contact was held between 29 Dec and 31 Jan (party at our friendís).

    Please tell me what to do. Accept the invitation and not contact her until the party? Reinitiate contact or suggest a meeting and probably be ignored?

  2. #2
    JT2012 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Accept the invitation from my ex?

    Ok. So I hope you are still working on you and your game. From what I read there are still AFC moves you did. Telling her what she can and can't do is beta. An alpha wouldn't. Be upset she had him over. Actually an alpha might be boiling inside. Might be furious some chump has his girl but he would never show it. He knows that this dude is nothing more than an orbiter that got lucky. It doesn't last. Now about this party. I'll tell u what I did. I had the same situation happen to me. I brought a chick with me. My ex brought her bf. They ignore me at the party and I not once approached them to talk. I ignored them. I drank. Socialized with everyone. Laughed. Had a good time. The girl I was with insisted she take a pic of me and her. When we took the pic, she kissed my cheek. My ex walked by me at that exact moment. It was epic. She left right after. Said bye to everyone but me. Then complained about it to her friend which naturally told me everything. It was great. I was the man of the hour. She was benched on the sideline with her poor excuse for a man. It worked. She is being a total jerk to you. Getting angry at you for little things. Why would you reward her with your kindness? Ignore her. When she has been a good girl then she can be rewarded with the presence of you, a gentleman. It's frame control and she is currently using it against you. Take that control back. She wants to have her cake and eat it too. Show her tough love.

  3. #3
    BuahahaXD is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Accept the invitation from my ex?

    Thanks for help mate. This AFC stuff happened 2 months ago, I have joined the game since then. I read lots of stuff, watched numerous videos on PUA stuff and started using some of them (body language, inner game etc.). Im still fighting Approach Anxiety and I havent really practiced any routines.

    For this reason I won't bring any girl to this party. I will focus on having fun with everyone else. Do you think I should ignore her BF completely? As far as I know he is not a real threat (maybe not AFC, but definetely not a PUA

    Do you think I should contact her before the party? I really don't know how to game her when she has a BF.


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